102. Bypass Your Overthinking Brain

Welcome to the Connected For Real podcast. I'm Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business. And my mission is to bring God's presence into your life, into your marriage and into your business. Let's get started

and we are live! Welcome everyone to the Connected For Real podcast. I'm Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman and today I am going to talk about how to bypass the overthinking brain. Now, not only that, I want to talk about what's going on behind the scenes and how you can get to a place where you can know exactly what to do next so you can find yourself overthinking and then know how to get out of it.

Okay, so let's get into it. I have been meeting with a lot of women lately because I have a handful of private coaching spots available as you have been hearing lately. And obviously, if you would like to take one, grab your deep Dive discovery call. It's free. It's 60 minutes. We go deep into what is actually holding you back.

We find the three main things, and then we create a roadmap so that you can know exactly what to do. And we can be extremely focused. Okay, so if you're ready to get out of this overthinking brain and to really delve into your life without being held back, this is the best thing for you. So now that we've said that.

I've been meeting with a lot of people, and I'm hearing a lot of overthinking. Everybody is overthinking, and it's natural. It's normal. It's what happens, and it's your brain's way of keeping you safe. So I want to talk about it because overthinking looks like being stuck in a loop being stuck in a rerun.

Right? Like almost watching the thing over and over again. Having all these stories and traumas and scars and lots of baggage. And I'm just finding that the lack of awareness is what's making us feel so helpless. It almost makes you feel like there's something wrong with you. Why am I not able to do this thing?

Right. Here's how it's showing up with the women that I'm meeting with. I hear things like I tried selling and I failed and I learned my lesson. I'm never selling again, or I'm not good with selling. Right. My husband loves me and wants the best for me, but I just can't get over this or that. And it's hovering between us.

That's a gigantic story. Happens all the time. Everybody thinks they're the only one by the way. Yeah. You're not the only one. This is normal. It's part of life and it's here to help us. So we're going to get into that. But first I want to give you a couple more examples because they're just so fascinating.

All I can see is how much of a failure I am when it comes to the house, the mess, the scattered brain. I just want to be good and I can't figure it out. And again, It's so common. It's so common. And by the way, I have been there. I am not a very organized person as you guys know, or let's say I used to be not a very organized person.

I can't believe now if I tell you how organized I am, you'd be Shocked. Even just with these podcast episodes, I am scripting them. I am recording them. I am ahead of the game. I have podcasts waiting to drop. It's such a good feeling to be organized. And it took a journey for me to get here.

So if you haven't been listening to the previous episodes, we just hit a hundred episodes. And in that hundreds episode, I talk about how I reached where I am. A lot of it is I had to go through the process that I take my people through. So go listen to that if you haven't yet. There's something wrong with me.

I'm broken, right? Things like that. Oh, so often. And I need so much money to get to my goal. I can't even see where it's going to come from. I can't see it happening. I'm stuck in a financial loop. These are all normal. They're all normal. And they're exhausting. They're draining. And they're keeping us really, really stuck.

Why are they keeping us stuck? Because here's what's happening. You want to go forward, but there's something holding you back. And so you keep having this resistance. And you think, if I just pull harder, if I just push Further if I just get over this thing, I will make it and in reality, what's happening is you're being held back almost like with a wire or string or a bouncy thing and it's like, no, that's not safe.

We got to keep you here. And that pull and push is happening. And it's so Frustrating because you don't know why it's happening. You get to this helpless point of like, Oh, I've tried so many times. I guess it's not happening. I guess it's not for me. Something I heard somebody say recently, as I guess, God doesn't want this for me because if he would have wanted it, then it would have already happened.

That is called false acceptance. Right? People are like, Oh, I need to learn to accept God's will. And here you are, basically in a reality that you're stuck in your own pull and push thing. And you're blaming it on God being like, I guess that God doesn't want me to. Well, guess what? God does want you to.

The first step you need to do is rewire your brain is bypass the overthinking it's figure out what needs to happen up here. To let go of that pullback, by the way, you know what happens when you stop, you know, where you, when you deal with what's happening back here, pulling you back is you now no longer have to work as hard to push forward.

You just start moving forward by default. Like you finally get to move without having to feel the resistance. So let's talk about what is going on behind the scenes. Okay. Your brain is here to protect you. It's here to keep you alive. It's here to keep you safe. Okay, and thank you brain, because without you, I probably would not be here.

Okay, so let's not make this a good or bad thing. It just is. This is the job of the brain, specifically the subconscious. The subconscious is everything that is behind the scenes. It's almost like in charge of default activity, and it collects information. And then spits back rules, beliefs, things that need to happen when this happens, then that happens type of thing, okay?

So, if you're really into like programming and things like that, this is really fun for you because your subconscious is basically step one, collecting information. Usually, we start as babies and very soon we learn that this is good, this is bad, this is what This does and this is what this means and we start to collect a lot of beliefs a lot of information a lot of stories And some of them are fine and some of them are not and you know, a lot of it is neutral It doesn't mean much but a lot of it is actually going to affect us subconsciously in a very Deep way, long term, and let me just give you a little secret of how the subconscious collects all this information.

It collects words and images. Those are like the two main things that the subconscious understands and can read. So the words that you're saying, the words that are being said, and the images that you're watching. And the images that are being shown. Okay. So it's fascinating to learn about the subconscious and how it works.

And when you understand that. You know, it's collecting these things and then it's spitting them back out with solidified rules, solidified beliefs. Basically, when this happens, that's called the trigger, right? When the trigger happens, here's the rule that needs to fall in, you know, go into effect in order to keep you safe, in order to protect you, in order to keep you nice and cozy and in the known, because is a trigger.

Unknown is not safe, right? We don't know what's out there. We know what's in here. So as much as, you know, comfort zone is called comfort zone. It's most of the time not comfortable at all. And you're wondering, why do I keep going to this discomfort to this thing that makes me feel like garbage? When I want to be there in the place that makes me feel amazing.

I want to succeed. I want to be at peace. I want to just shine. I want to have all these great things. And why am I feeling so held back? And why am I being pulled down into the mud every single time I get this close to finally making it? That's what's happening. Is as soon as your brain detects unknown unsafe, scary territory, the first thing it will do is pull you back.

And that pullback is that resistance that you feel. It's those thoughts that pop up. It's the stories that start to go haywire and the overthinking starts. And the overthinking is here to protect you. If you can go into a loop and rerun the same video over and over again in your head and just watch how you failed last time and how miserable you were and how you can't try again, and there's no way, then you're keeping yourself safe.

Your brain is busy with nothing, right? You're basically paralyzed and you're safe. This is the best way to keep you alive, but it's not the best way to get things done. It's not the best way to see momentum and movement and success and results. Those are all outside of comfort zone. So how do you bypass that overthinking brain?

How do you bypass all those triggers and all of that noise that is being thrown at you when You want to do the things you want to do. And that's the big question. So your brain is collecting things like success is dangerous. Men are selfish. Food is complicated. Money is dirty. These are all beliefs. Okay.

These are all things that your brain collected information about and created a solidified belief that says. This is it. This is what we know now about money. This is what we know now about food. This is what we know about men. This is what we know about friends. You know, they always disappoint me. This is what we know about family.

Oh, blah, blah, blah. Right? It creates beliefs about things, and then it's wonderful because it doesn't have to think too much. Don't forget. The brain is built to be lazy. It wants to take as many shortcuts as possible. So it doesn't have to think too much. It creates systems and then just leans on those systems for.

Default for living for reactivity, right? So reacting is a lot easier than being proactive because it's lazy because you don't have to think too much because it's just so easy Okay, so anytime a situation Gets to a place where your brain has to react. It's not gonna think about this specific situation It's just going to project what it knows about this type of situation And everything that is built behind the scenes to create that belief.

Okay? So far so good. You guys with me? Take a deep breath. This is all good. Now. Your brain is not good or bad. Like we said It's not like we're trying to fight the subconscious and do something against ourselves and like I just need to push harder It's actually the opposite. It's how do I? Reprogram these beliefs.

How do I go back into the subconscious and really tweak? The things that I know Or the things that I think I know to be more helpful in success, to be more helpful in getting results, to be more work with me and not against me type of way. So, this is a great question, and I just want you to notice, by the way, that fear, and shame, and guilt, and most of the low consciousness emotions are here to protect, they're here to keep you paralyzed, they're here to help the subconscious.

Do its job. So a lot of times when I am sitting down with all of my feelings, I'll imagine that I have a big table and everybody is sitting nicely and I'm the one running the show and I give the mic to each emotion. I'm like fear. What do you have to say about this? And fear will get up and be like, you guys don't understand.

This is so so dangerous. We have so much evidence that this is not going to be good. And I just want you to realize that we're going into danger zone and blah, blah, blah. And here's all the things I can tell you about the past experiences and how it's going to really go wrong because it's taking past and projecting it onto the future.

And then I say, thank you so much. You're here to protect me, and I'm really grateful that you're here. Is there anything else you want to tell us? And fear will go on and say, well, here are the points I want you to notice. And boom, boom, boom. And did you think about this, and did you think about that, right?

And like, I let it say its thing, and then I thank it. And then it feels complete and like, okay, I said what I have to say. Everybody is going to be respectful and we have to hear all the voices. So then I'm like, okay, shame, what's going on with you? You know, and shame is like, don't you know how shameful it is to, to be a failure?

How could you, how could you even try to succeed and then not succeed? And then have to deal with the shame involved of having to feel this way. Like, I just want you to not. Get there, right? And you're like, thank you so much. You really, you know, this is amazing. And I go through all of my emotions and it's so beautiful because, you know, I end up with emotions like hope and trust and belief, and they all speak up and say.

Thank you so much for bringing up all these past experiences, but I think that we can also, you know, notice how this situation is different and the evidence that has been shown in the last couple of weeks that I'm actually on the right track and here is this, that, the other. So I suddenly have a little bit more view of what's going on, but this is just the behind the scenes of how I deal with.

Some of these emotions, but I just wanted you to become aware of how these very low consciousness emotions, they're here to protect us. They're here to help us. And they're not bad. They're just not helpful right now. Right? Like it's not serving me to be afraid. It's not serving me to feel guilty about. You know, wanting to succeed or to feel shame about my failures in the past, it's going to be a lot more helpful if I can lean into other things like the trust in God, the trust in myself, the trust in the process hope and, you know, all these other great things.

So that aside, let's go back to how do we bypass all of this? How do we bypass the entire drama that is happening behind the scenes. That is keeping you so stuck that is pulling you back all the time So number one I said this before i'm going to say this again We need to reprogram the subconscious And this sounds complicated.

It's actually simpler than you think, because when you break it down, the subconscious is really built of words and images, right? And so. If you want to think of how do I reprogram the images? Well, first of all, you have to stop watching certain things. Like, please, you know? If you're consuming images that give you certain beliefs about how you're supposed to look, or how you're supposed to feel, or how you're supposed to react, then of course, your brain is going to think that's normal.

If it's not normal, then please do yourself a favor and cleanse those out of your life. Best thing you can do for yourself. That's just on a very basic level. The next thing is, vision boards are great because you can see with your eyes the images that you want to get to, you want to feel. I have an image, I have a picture on my desk of a girl going like, And I wrote on it, you know, I'm doing it.

I am doing it. And it sounds ridiculous, but like, it actually feels really good. Every time I walk by and I see her, I'm like, Yeah, I am. I am. Like, I'm clapping for myself. I'm excited about it because I didn't believe I can do it. And here I am. I'm doing it. Right? So she's like having this very cute. Image to remind me of this feeling that I want to be feeling all the time. Another great way is if you want to go somewhere, put a picture there, you know, put a picture of where you want to be. If you want a new house or if you want a new thing, just see it all the time. See it, put it in front of you.

It's so fun. It's so fun because all you need to see it. I once did a vision board about time and my time management. I was always late. I was always going over time. I was always just. Completely not attached to time. I'm still not perfect. You can ask my husband. I'm, I am, you know, he needs to tell me.

We're leaving in five minutes. Okay. It's three minutes now. It's two minutes. Are you ready? Don't you need to go to the bathroom before we go? Like, he really And he is very, very patient with me, and he has a better sense of time than I do. And I burn food a lot. I burn cookies a lot, or I used to, because I just didn't have the sense of time.

But with time and, you know, with the help of this vision board, I created an entire vision board of how, you know, I actually found a picture of The clock from Beauty and the Beast, and the other guy, the the, the one holding the candles, and they're like, clapping for me, cause I got time right, you know, cause like, I got it.

I put timers now, I have reminders, I lean onto the systems in order to help me, because why do I need to feel broken if I'm actually just normal? Like this is who I am. I'm not built to be like all computer like and aware of time. I'm built to be very fluid and very spontaneous and This is what I am, right?

So it's been really fun. Just having this whole poster of different images of time and how I am in flow and how I am keeping track and how I start on time and I end on time. And my zooms are actually really nice and tight. I love it now. I used to not be able to do these podcasts and things because I'd be like, Oh my gosh, I totally went overtime or now I have to edit like, what do we do?

And now I know, I know exactly what to do. I know exactly when we start and when we end, there's something that I reprogrammed by helping me see. How important it was for me, okay? So the vision boards are a great idea. If you ever have a chance to do a vision board in a group, I highly recommend it.

  Hey! Before we continue the episode, I want to ask you something. Are you ready to get answers from God directly? Feel more in love with your husband and more supported than ever? Run the business of your dreams without having to sacrifice any other part of your life? That is exactly what my one on one private coaching is for and I want to invite you, just you and me, for a free deep dive discovery call.

This is a 60 minute free call where I ask you lots of questions and we extract the three main things that are holding you back. I then put together a personalized plan for you where I create a roadmap of recommendations with practical steps. The call is free and so valuable in itself. So go book yours today.

Now back to the show.

 Another way of using images to your advantage is guided imagery or meditation or the imagined images. Because here's the thing about your subconscious. It doesn't know the difference between real and imagined. It doesn't. So the images that you imagine are going to be just as powerful as the images that you see with your eyes.

And so if you can imagine being successful, if you can imagine reaching the goal, if you can imagine writing that check, if you can imagine moving in or walking into a whatever. If you can see it with your mind's eye, you will reprogram the images that were there before, right? You can actually have new information override the old information.

just by creating it. This is so powerful. And this is something that I use with my clients. Almost every single session, we do a meditation because I want you to be able to see what we did, what we spoke about, what came up. I want you to let it really seep into every cell of your body. I love the experiential part of the guided meditations because You actually get so much information that in my opinion is the best way to bypass the overthinking brain And I actually recently had somebody in the middle of a discovery call.

I said, there's just too much too much overthinking Let's just get into a meditation. It's super random. I just felt like it needed to happen So I went with the flow, you know me very flowy and I put her into a meditation I said, okay, you know take a deep breath Relax Feel yourself on the chair. You're safe.

And we started doing something and I see her keep like, you know, peeking. And like opening her eyes to make sure that I'm still there. To make sure that everything's okay. To make sure that there's nobody coming in. And the answers that she gave me for what do you see? And what was the package? And what was in the package?

Were all very up here in her head. It was all things that she was thinking up consciously, like the things she thinks she's supposed to see, or the things that she expects to see, or the things that she thinks I expect her to see, okay? And I said to her, wait, stop. You're in your head. Get out of your head.

And let yourself see whatever comes up. And she took a deep breath and I really, really forced her to send her back into her heart and go deep into this place that is completely not in your head, completely not there. Just not right. And

I'm just doing it now, putting my hand on my heart and taking a deep breath. It was such a beautiful moment when she actually was able to get back. Into herself, and then she saw the most magnificent things that gave us the most amazing answers about where she was, what she needs to do, what's going on behind the scenes, and she did not even expect it.

She didn't know that was what was going on because she thought so much about what was supposed to be going on. And. The answers that came up from that were just so powerful. And you can't, you can't do that with the brain. You can't do that by thinking it through. You have to be able to experience it. So I am so into this and I could talk about it all day.

I probably will make an episode just about this. Okay, so stay tuned. It's probably going to be next week and is probably going to be called the subconscious versus the super conscious. Because this is something that I'm fascinated by. And I love talking about, okay, how do you change the words? How do you help yourself reprogram the subconscious collected words?

So number one, mantras are great. Just repeating words you want to say. Now people are like, Oh, this is so well, you know, fluffy. This is so woo woo, whatever. Actually, you do this all the time, except with the wrong words. You're like, I can't do this. I don't know how I can't do it. I'm a total failure. I'm such a slob. I can't get my act together. We say this all the time. We do this all the time, except the mantras are not. They're not serving you, they're not actually helping you, they're not getting you anywhere near where you want to be. If anything, they are the exact problem that is being created here.

You are creating beliefs that are proving to your brain that yes, we can't do it. We cannot do it. We're total slobs. We can't get it together. I am just incapable. So, are you surprised? That your brain is holding you back because it's just working with what you give it, right? And so yes those thoughts and those words that you're using they come out naturally and they just sort of happen. We hear things we repeat things we come up with them ourselves, whatever it is Those are mantras too.

So don't tell me you don't do mantras. You just happen to do the wrong type. Okay? Take a deep breath, become intentional about what you say. I can be on time. When something is important to me, I remember. I organize things ahead of time. I think things through. I'm intentional, right? Whatever the thing is that you want to say about yourself.

Start saying it and say it in the present because it's happening right now. It's not one day. I'll be organized one day. I'll be, you know, put together. No, it's I am organized. And your brain is going to be like, yeah, right? No, you're a knot. And you'll be like, yes, I am. Watch this. I just picked up the clothes from the floor and I put it into the basket.

And you're like, yeah, big deal. Everybody does that. Well, I didn't do that yesterday and I did it today, which means that I am organized, right? And prove to yourself over and over again. I am organized. I am organized. I am. Do you see this? I mean, I have an entire year planned of podcasts with guests and we're not even in the beginning of February.

Like today I'm recording on February 1st, but this will probably drop next week. I have so much already done, so much already planned, so many people already on the roster. And when people ask me, can I be on your podcast? I have to really look because there's not that many spots left. I am so organized, but if you would talk to me like seven years ago, I'd be like, no way.

I mean, just the fact that I have notes and I'm telling you what I want to say in an organized fashion, and I'm not just spewing whatever comes into my mind, that's mind blowing. Okay. I don't have word for word notes. I just put some. Pointers down that I want to address and I'm happy I did because it keeps me on track and that's a very organized thing to do so You know, you get a little bit of the behind the scenes of my life too.

This is fun. Okay. The last thing I want to tell you is journaling. Journaling is a great way to use words to reprogram the brain. Why? Because the first thing you do in journaling is you just allow yourself to be aware of what's going on. You let it all out. You think on paper. You brain dump all the beliefs.

All the things you're actually thinking, all the things that you're actually believing, it's all going in the journal. And then you go back and you're like, what from here do I want to keep? What do I want to highlight? What is true? And what can I let go of? Right?

I have a whole training on journaling in my sessions and trainings section in my program. Journaling is one of the best ways to allow yourself to hear what's actually going on behind the scenes. Because when you start thinking. About what you actually, what is, what's actually going on? Oh, I'm doing this, that, the other.

And then your brain picks up that you're onto something, and it will distract you. And it will, you know, take you on tangents. And you won't be able to finish the sentence. And you'll be very confused at why you can't work this through in your head. The reason is because your brain has caught on. It's like, we don't want you doing this.

This is dangerous. Let's just keep the programming as is and not mess with it. Okay, so when you try to think it through, it doesn't work. It, a lot of times, will get sabotaged by your subconscious. What writing it down does is, It just overrides or bypasses the thinking and allows it to just come out on paper.

Like, I'm just writing down what I'm thinking, it's fine, I'm allowed to. But then I can then have it on paper and like, once it's on paper, it's pinned down. It's not going anywhere. It can't change or shift or do this magical thing that it does when it's in my head. I didn't mean that, you know. It's like you say like, oh, men are such whatevers.

And then somebody repeats that to you. Like, I didn't say that. I didn't mean that. I just meant that men are, you know, annoying. It's like, stop it. You know, once it's written down, it's written down and you can really look at and be like, that's what I believe. Of course I'm not connecting. Of course I'm not successfully dating or getting married or whatever.

Right? With a belief like that about men, I, you know definitely going to hold you back. Right? And this is about money, too. If I believe this about money, money is dirty. Money is disgusting. Money makes people bad. All this stuff that we hear and learn about money, it just holds you back from making money.

Why would you want to have a relationship with money? Why would you want money in your house or in your life if it's so gross? Right. And so subconsciously, we're sabotaging ourselves all the time with these beliefs. And if I could put it down on paper, and I could pin it down, and I can really start to think on purpose, it is going to be a game changer.

Okay. So if you want to use words to your advantage, write the words down, write the words down. And I actually did this. There was like a group that was working together to reprogram the subconscious locally. And it was really cute. The homework the first week was just write down what you want to think on purpose.

And I just write it down three times and be done. That's it. I just have a journal full of like, I am organized. I am, you know, capable of being on time. Whatever it was. I don't remember the exact details, but it was well formatted. And after we wrote it down for a week, The next thing was to

say it. And I think we had to record ourselves in audio to the WhatsApp group. And the week after we had to actually record ourselves on video and see ourselves saying it. And by the fourth week, we had to leave each other messages of how true it is, like, find all the evidence. You know, I've been working on this for the last month, and here's all the evidence of how I am this, that, the other.

It was so fascinating. It was so powerful. It was extremely life changing. And That was, it was part of the vision board, by the way. Like the, it started with a vision board. We created the statement and then we had to do the homework. It was a month long support group. What's up group thing. And it was cute.

It was really cute. I have to say it was one of my favorite things that I did. That, you know, in that season. So in conclusion, let's wrap it all up and see what we talked about and how you can get the most out of this conversation and also what you can start thinking about. Okay. So number one, an uncoached brain is completely different than a coach brain.

And my coach, Steph Crowder says this, and it's totally true. If you have who to go to and coach through a situation, you will more likely have clarity than if you're trying to do it yourself. And this brings me to the next point that I wrote down, which is our blind spots.

These are all in our blind spots. You're not going to see that. This is the reason that you're being held back It's gonna be very hard for you to catch that. This is what's happening Why because your subconscious is under the ground. It's very hidden. It's Hard to see and it's also very strategically placed there so that you don't start messing with the programming and try to like, you know mess it up or get it wrong, right?

Just like if you had a program and somebody went into the databases and like started to touch the things behind the scenes that actually changed things in the whole program. Like that's a little dangerous if they don't know what they're doing. So if you don't have the right guidance, if you don't have the right People who know what they're doing and can help you with this.

It may be a very scary thing for your brain to let you do it yourself. And that's why it doesn't let you do it yourself. It's, it's hidden and it's keeping itself very safe. Now one of the things I see with people who try to do it on their own is that they hit a wall. And feel failure and then they just prove to themselves that there you go.

I can't there's, you know, there is something wrong with me. I obviously can't get this right because I couldn't do it with all the advice I heard on that podcast. You know, like obviously you're not going to be able to do it all just because you heard about what's, what I just said on a podcast, right?

Or even if you hear many, many podcasts, or if you learn a lot of books, it's great. But at the end of the day, you need somebody to reflect it with you, to process it with you, to hold you so that you can feel safe enough to go in there and reprogram, right? It will be a lot more difficult to do the reprogramming part on your own.

The bypassing, yes, you can do on your own. You can learn to bypass the overthinking and you can learn to question the overthinking. Why am I overthinking? What is trying to keep me safe? What's going on? That those are tools and skills that you can actually get really good at. And then you can know what to do next that you could do on your own, but the reprogramming definitely takes support.

And I highly recommend that you get the support again. I am here for you. I would love to work with you. I just need you to schedule a discovery call so I know you exist and we can actually meet and talk about how. This will look for you because I'm very intentional about how unique every person is and how specific Every process is to every person so I don't just you know, give you like a these are all the things you need It's like very specific to you and your needs and that's why I take a full hour. Yesterday I met with someone who

In the first 20 minutes was like, this is what I want. And this is so amazing. And as a salesperson, you'd think like, Oh, she's ready. She wants what she wants. She knows what she wants. She can communicate it. Oh, this is great. And then 20 minutes in and she starts. Settling down and telling me all the reasons why she can't have it. And that's what, that's what the gold is. Like, that's where it actually matters. Because, you know, just the technicalities of how to do something. Like, how to open a podcast. I can tell you that. It's easy, right? It's technical. You can look it up online.

Like, step one, step two, step three. Here's a checklist. That's not what it's all about. It's why haven't you done it yet? Why aren't you there? And the answer is because all these reasons. So the first 20 minutes you would think like, Woohoo! Everything's great! And then when you settle and you actually trust each other and meet each other and get to a point where it's like safe enough to say, but then it feels so different and you can actually get so much deeper.

And as you know, I cannot do superficial. I only do depth. I just don't know how. Superficial is very hard for me. So. Again, you know, I give you 60 minutes. It's my gift to you. First of all, because it's the way that I love to serve and second of all, because once we can solidify a plan, I think it's much easier to know what to do next.

Right? Like, you don't just start working with someone without having a plan. I don't know. I just personally don't. Another piece of advice, you know, this is a saying that Debbie Sasson used to always say when we were, when I was being coached by her. Think on purpose. You know, just stop yourself in your tracks and say, Something's going on, I'm overthinking, what do I want to think?

And just think it. Allow yourself to think I can do it. You know, this is possible It's so hard in the beginning and then you get used to it and it's really fun. Okay, so definitely Give it a try and this is the big one if you can't afford a coach Cuz I know I was there. I was very stuck if you heard the podcast about you know, my story We were so poor And I was so ready, but we couldn't afford it.

I'm not going to tell you to, you know, put yourself in danger in order to have a coach. It doesn't work like that, right? God has a time and a place for everything and everything is orchestrated perfectly. So if you can't afford a coach journal journal, it's the closest way to get that effect of an external Feedback, external reflection, and it is so helpful.

So helpful. First of all, you can write down all of your downloads, all of your ideas, all of the ways that you're working through things, and then also just write what's happening, because then you'll be able to pick up on the subtle. Beliefs behind the scenes and then be able to question them and work through them a great way.

A great book that I highly recommend is hold that thought. By Hannah Mason. She talks about the thoughts that are in our head and how they affect us and Everything that's going on behind the scenes. I love the name hold that thought. I think it's just genius. There's a lot more I could say about this, but I think overall if you can't afford a coach. Listen to as many coaches as you can find the ones that really resonate and do everything they say. Listen to all their podcasts, consume all their freebies, do everything you can to get into their world and have a relationship with them.

And one day when it's the right time and you do have the money. Then you'll know what to do with it. It won't be so farfetched. It will just be like, Oh, I already know who I would work with. I already have a plan. I already know what I'm going to do. All I need to do is just get on with, you know, this. So definitely recommend the strategy.

It worked for me and it works for a lot of my people. By the way, I just want to say within this, I can't afford a coach. I have payment plans. You can start working for with me for as little as 200 a month on a payment plan, and then you will see results and you will see mind blowing experiences and just, uncovering things that you reimagine what life could look like, and then make that happen is so beautiful.

It is such a beautiful process. What else I was going to tell you is that I just graduated one of my clients she worked with me for three months. And when I told her what we did in the last three months, like I really reviewed it with her and I said, do you remember where you started?

Let me read to you some of the things that you told me when we did our discovery call and look at where you are now. She said, priceless. Priceless. I can't even put a price on that. It's priceless. You changed my life. And that, to me, is the best compliment. It's just such a beautiful experience to be part of.

To watch someone so quickly transform so drastically. And it's amazing. Okay. If you love this episode, and you want more, make sure you stay here, subscribe, and, you know, hit whatever buttons you need to hit in order to stay with me, because I have, I think, eight or nine topics that are coming up that are really All related and great, just absolutely amazing topics.

I won't tell you them all, but I did tell you a little bit about next week. I also have all my guests that are dropping every Monday. So make sure that you listen to those because they're fascinating and I love every single one of them. I can't even pick my favorite one because they're just. Gold everywhere and I want you to remember that you too can be connected for real so go out there and do it I love you.

Have a great day  And that's it! Thank you for listening to the very end. I would love if you can leave a review and subscribe to the podcast. Those are things that tell the algorithm this is a good podcast and make sure to suggest it to others. Wouldn't it be amazing if more people became more connected for real? And now take a moment and think of someone who might benefit from this episode.

Can you share it with them? I am Robinson Bat chen Grossman from connectedforreal. com. Thank you so much for listening and don't forget you can be connected for real.