122. The Key to Communicating With G-d

 Welcome to the Connected For Real podcast. I'm Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business. And my mission is to bring God's presence into your life, into your marriage and into your business. Let's get started. 

 And we are live Welcome everyone to the connected for real podcast. I'm Rebetzin Bat-Chen Grossman. I'm a marriage coach for women in business And today we are talking about communication And God and with me today is none other than my father And I'm so excited about this conversation. So Rabbi Chanoch Gez, go ahead, introduce yourself and tell us all about you.

Shalom, everybody. I am Rabbi Gez, Chanoch Gez. I'm the father of this nice lady. Near me. I'm amazed how how she really believe in Hashem Yitbarach.  And she always said that it come from home. I hope that we did something good  to this issue. And we are very happy that she influenced many other people to believe in real in God. 

You know, I can begin with, with a nice story that someone that was like in his 35, 40, so the Chafetz Chaim came to him and say, no, why you are not married? So he says, everybody try to make me shidduch, but they don't give me more than three years. I want five years.  That they will take care of me.

For the first five years of Zu, you know, in Europe it was, it was, uh, normal that if someone one day to have a good Talmid Chacham. So you know, he promised few years in advance that he will take care of the, of the boy in the family.  So Chafetz Chaim we ask him, so what do you want? He said, I want at least five years.

So the Chafetz Chaim said, who said that you will live more than three years? So he said, what, Rabbi, you curse me?  Rabbi said, no, no, I don't curse you. But the question, who said that you will live more? He said, Rabbi, I believe that I will live until 120. He said, very good, okay. So, he say, so why you worry about this?

He say, no, no, no, maybe after I will have kids and maybe after, someone has to pay for this. So, he say, who said that you will have kids? So, he say, I believe that God will give me kids. So, Chafetz Chaim told him, you believe so much in God and you, you have a problem about this two years gap?  You have to understand that Hashem is provided.

He provides everything to everyone  according to what he thinks that these are the right things. So if someone gives you a good Shidduch for three years, I don't understand what, where are you, where are you going with this? You believe in God in everything? Just in this you don't believe? This is very bad.

You have to believe in God absolutely without any doubt for all the, all the things and for all the time.  Yes. So I think it's a good it's a good story just to begin about the Emunah B'Hashem, about the faith in God. And you know, I will tell you another story about Chacham Sassi. Chacham Sassi was living in Herzliya.

He was a big tzaddik and someone come to get the bracha from him. So he said, Rabbi, I really need your help because I don't have this and this and that. So the rabbi told him, Chacham Sassi told him, you know, One moment, let me understand something. You believe in God? You say, yes, I believe in God. Do you believe that God give you all what you need?

You say, yeah, I believe that God give me all what I need. So you say, why you come to me? Go to God. Well, if you want to talk to God, you want to ask something from Hashem. Why you have to come to tzaddik? Why do you have to come to, to rabbi? Go talk to God. And I just heard last day last week that in the old time, you know, if in the Europe, you know, for example, if someone someone have a problem, you know, his horse was was sick.

They went to school. They went to the synagogue. They opened the ark and they say, God. Our Earth. He's like, he's like sick. We have, you have to help us. We, we, if not you, you know how we'll have, parnasa'll have sustinance  and that's exactly the message. The message is you believe in God, so talk to God and God will provide whatever you need.

You have to believe absolutely in God. You don't just. Talk it. You just, just tell to the, to the title. You know, I believe in God. No. You believe in God. Talk to him, talk to him, and make sure that you, you do the best.  Pay attention to your bakashot and  your teffilot yeah. Let's just say that in English, your prayers and your requests.

So that people who are listening can put together the sentence now.  Yes. Okay. So wait.  Yeah. Okay. One second. So now let's get practical. How do you talk to God?  Exactly as I talk to you. You talk to me. I talk to you. You have to feel, P'shiviti Hashem l'nigdi tamid. You have to understand that God is here around you.

It's not just a song. God is here. God is there. God is everywhere. God is here. So just talk to him. You don't have even to open the ark for this. You just talk to God. You know, Hashem is here. Hashem hear us. Whatever we do now, Hashem is here and He knows what we're doing. We do things, Hashem  will pay attention for us.

We ask Hashem whatever you need and we have to talk to Hashem. As Rabbi Nachman says, Rabbi Nachman says, you have to talk to God now. Like, he's in front of you like a friend, and you talk to him, you just talk to him because that's how you talk to God. You know, the problem is that we get so far away from Hashem, from God, that we think that he's somewhere there, you know, in, in abstract.

But no, he's here around me. I believe that he's here.  God, you hear me now? Probably you give us power to talk. In the morning I say, Baruch Hashem pukei achivrim, mechim yitzhari gaver. I really mean for everything, matir asurim. I believe that Hashem Barach  does exactly what I I bless him for this. 

Hashem gave me the power to open my eyes today. Hashem opened my mouth. And whatever I say now, I believe that Hashem also give me to say. And, you know, in the,  in the 13,  13 main things of theism,  one of them is  so where I have a friend that say, I don't know why I talk to God if you know what I think I can just think about it.

I don't even have to talk open my mouth. I just, I just talk to him in my mind. I say, God, you know what I, what I need. You know what, what, what you can pro provide me, and I really maybe need it now I have a problem with my kid. I have something that I need  to finish in my business. I get to do.

I, I have to be, I believe it, not, I have to believe. I believe that if  this is one of the, this is the number seven, I think from the Kareem, from the.   He knows the thoughts,  of people Exactly. Hashem knows even the thoughts of the people. He doesn't need that you will verbalize it. But we still, for us, we need to verbalize it because, this is what make it, make it like a prayer.

We have to move our lips and we have to do chituch. We have to cut our words like this. Hashem is Barach. We see that we're serious. And when we're talking to Him, we really, Want to emphasize our belief that he is behind everything. And we have a, we have a phrase, The Ten Od Mil Vadod, that Hashem Barach is the only one who provides everything and is here.

So if it's so,  we actually, this is the end of the conversation. I mean, I don't close the, the, the camera now, but this is the end of the conversation. If you believe that Hashem hear, Hashem hear you, Hashem hear with E E E R, E E E A R, and Hashem is hearing you, like hearing you, yeah?  So, it's hear and hear.

He also hears. Exactly, it's hear and hear you. So, if it's so, and you don't, you know how I think, so this is good, good beginning. Thank you. Now, the rest is just to continue to live with emunah, with faith. The Hashem is here and He hears me and whatever I need, He provides me. Even if I don't need it, He provides me.

You know, sometimes you, some people don't really need to wake up in the morning today because they don't have something important to do, but still they wake up. Because Hashem waked him up, and He said, maybe you have to do something else, that maybe I didn't send you to this olam, to this world, just to lay on your bed, you know, probably if I send you, you have a mission, you have a mission, so wake up, do it. 

Yeah, so wake up and do it. How do we know our mission? Oh, this is, this is the secret. This is the secret that nobody can answer.  Some people know to tell you, you have to understand your mission is to help other people, or your mission is to sit and learn. And everyone has to find out. Until you find out, you die.

I mean, it's like when you find out what is your real mission, so you know that you are in the, you're going to do it, and when you finish, have a nice day, goodbye. Because if you know what is the mission, and that's the reason, by the way, that we do Olam Chasid Ibaneh. When you do chasid, so you make people to rely on you.

So in the moment that you think that you believe that your mission is to help other people, and you do so, So when you help other people and you do so,  it's part of your mission. You cannot miss it. You cannot miss the opportunity to do it. So Hashem will give you all the power, all the force, to do chesed with other people.

And that's what we say, Olam chesed ibaneh. Okay, so heed is good deeds and it the world is, is built on good deeds because we are dependent on each other. Is that what you just said? Yeah. If you are the provider of the chessed, so it means that you are  to help person. So  in this world and you will continue to need you if you continue to do chessed, if you don't do chessed so.

Maybe you finish your mission. That's the takeaway from today is be useful. People be useful.  Definitely. Definitely. You have to definitely you have to do has said it can be called useful. It can be a helper, and it can be a someone with significant  importance to other people. That, you know, everybody is important to other people.

One is like, because because he's a, he's provider substance and one is because he provided psychologically and many, many, many, many missions you have, you see here now, in the world.  So many people  find that they have to do something else above of what they used to do before, and they try to come and provide it to other people, and you know, nobody asked them this.

They just understand that.  It's come from inside that you want to feel that you do something because you are a messenger from Hashem to help other people. Okay.  I hope it's clear. Yes. So we are messengers. We're here in order to serve. We are vessels and we are living this world in order to be of service.

God is using us in order to run the world, basically, right? Right. That's the reason Hashem creates the human being because He doesn't want to make the world completed. He wants that the human being will help  because like this, human being has significant part in this world.  If Hashem will give us all the, you know, all the, all the, all what we need.

Before asking, before even having the conversation. So this will be the end of the world, because Hashem doesn't want it to be, continue and to be better. So the point is, Hashem create the basic and you have to continue and to help to continue to create the world. That's what we say in Tehillim.  In Tehillim, chet, I think,  chet or tet.

Ma enosh ki tizkerenu benadam ki tifkedenu vateh chaseh omat meleukem Because it's like in Hebrew, so I will try to explain it. Ma enosh ki tizkerenu benadam ki tifkedenu After all, what is a human being? Nothing is, is, what, what is a human being? A human being is, is no No more than, let's say, 70, 80, 90 years living, doing things in this world.

But who is he? Nothing. But v'tchassahu me'at me'elokim, because Hashem wants us to do something that He, in a special way, He didn't do it in this world because He keep it like missing, because He wanted  These small things that still we have to do in the world, we have to do it. And this is give us significant job in this world.

And that's the reason that we have to, Patek Hasser u Mehat Meluchim, we have to, we have to believe that Hashem give us the power to change the world, to do it better. Unfortunately, people take what we have. What Hashem provides us and He doesn't always use it for good, but  the idea is like to use it for good. 

Yeah, so this is the basically the idea of co creation where God put you here and left you something to do so that you can create with Him and  perfect it together. You know, basically, yeah, exactly. Exactly. And you have to believe that whatever you can do, other people cannot do. Meaning that if the same, the same way that the faces off a human being is different from different other people, the same way is also the mission.

Everyone has a mission in this world, and this mission has to come out from him. He's the only one who can provide it. Other people cannot provide the same level. We, we know that you know, in the, in rabbi is like very interesting. You know, the, some rabbi says Maik is like, is like you know, to, to help people.

In a,  some people say that Maik is like to help other people to learn to run.  So everyone tried to find out. What is his purpose in this world? But the point is that you have to understand that if you are not here, so the world is missing something. That's the reason, by the way, that in the end of the life, after we bury the person, we say, Yitgadal bit chadash shemeh rabah.

Why? Because when a person is alive, he is doing something that G d wants him to do. He is here present in this world because he has a mission. In the moment that someone is just passed away and died, in this moment, We don't have this face in this world, meaning it's like, we don't have this someone who had the mission, and therefore,  we pray to Hashem that Hashem will provide us whatever He missed, whatever we miss now because we don't have this face or this person, in different way.

And that's what we say, It gadal mit kadash emer haba, meaning it's like God will be higher in different way, By different faces, by different generation, by different other people, that maybe you will give them the, the, the same purpose that this this, unfortunately, This  is so beautiful. So in the business world, this is called your USP, your unique selling proposition.

You have to find that you bring to the table and no one else can do. And it's going to help you sell exactly what it is that you do, because no one else can do it like you. One of the things that happened to me is, you know, there's so many coaches out there. Who needs me? Like,  why do I matter if everyone else is doing the same thing?

And what makes you realize, That you actually have a specific job with a specific unique selling proposition is no one else can do it the way you do it No one else can say it the way you say it. So Very powerful Thank you Exactly. This is exactly what I say now that you have unique In your personality, you have your unique in your ability, and you have to understand that it's not your power.

It's power from Hashem. Hashem. When he put you in this world, he put you with the mission and also with the power to do it means like nobody give a mission to someone that is not capable to do it. So Hashem give us eyes, Hashem give us ears, Hashem give us hand, Hashem give us life. Hashem To do certain things, and we have to use it in the right way. 

I love that. And you know, I just heard recently in a class I was in, she said, we look around and we say, but I'm missing this or I don't have that. How can I do my mission? And she says, it's like saying, I sit in front of the computer all day doing my job as an, you know, tech person and I don't have the car that I need in order to travel.

Why would you need a car? But the guy who needs to go places and sell and, you know, travel for his work car comes as part of the job because he needs it, right? So every person is going to get the tools he needs in order to do the work he needs to do. Can you imagine if the dentist opened up his tool case, his tool box, whatever it is, And suddenly saw IT stuff, you know, like there's computer or phone and some mouse and whatever.

It's like, what do I do with this? This isn't what I need, right? So every person gets the tools he needs in order to do the job he is here to do, which is really powerful and helps us with that comparison problem because A lot of times we think it needs to be like everyone else, or we need whatever they have in order to be the person we need to be, and that's not true. 

Right,  right. This is reminding me a story, a Hasidic story, that the Magi Midumna say, Magi Midumna was living in about 200 years ago, and he say, he say that someone had to take a horse with a agala,  With the chariot to,  to the dancing. Dancing was the, the market. So it took him for three days and then he told him, you'll be with me with the chariot all the time.

You carry my stuff and everything. So suddenly the, the guy,  the driver stop in his house and he put a big pot of food in the chariot.  And the owner told you, what are you doing? He said, I bring him my food. He said, no, you don't, you don't get it.

They see you. If you're working for me, I provide you all, whatever you need, you will sleep in the same in the same hotel that I sleep. You will eat the same food that I eat because I have to provide you whatever you need. To do what I need to, what I need you to do. And this is exactly the message from Hashem.

If Hashem, give you tools that you don't use it. It's very sad. If Hashem  give you a mission without tools. It's not even exist because Hashem knows God. When I say Hashem, Hashem is God. When God gives you a mission, He sends you to this world with all the box of tools that you need.  If you need to talk to people, so your way of talking is like, that was with Moshe Rabbeinu.

Moshe Rabbeinu told him, How can I talk to the people if I'm Kvad Peh or Kvad Hashem, if I don't have this ability? Hashem told him, What are you talking about? It's me, Sam Peh, or me, Sam Peh Lashon. Lada who, who give a per, who give a person a way to talk. They don't. You think it's like me. So whatever you need, you'll have.

And we said that Bannu gave us the Torah with all his defect of, of talking, and it was in purpose because em want him to talk a hundred percent , pure Torah and not the other things. So, you know, that's a message, a message that you do what Hashem tell you to do. Hashem provide you all what you need to do it, and good luck, good luck with your life.

And if you need something, just talk to Him.  Yes, so, so this brings us to, you know, a lot of people know how to talk. They know how to ask. We've been trained to turn to God and say,  But we don't have a clue about how to listen. We were never taught how to listen to the answers, how to find what God actually wants.

So how do you do that?  Okay, that's very interesting. You know, now you ask the other side of the of the queue, because until now we talk how we talk to God. Now how we listen. Very interesting question because we don't hear what Hashem tell us. That's what we think, but it's not true. It's not true at all.

First, Chazal saying that bat kol, in the old time it was bat kol, and we had the Nevi'im, that they used to come and say to the people, whatever Hashem say.  Today, we don't have either Nevi'im and either bat kol. Bat kol is like a voice from God. That tell you what to do. And if, if someone will come today and say, Hashem told me, in my voice, I heard Hashem, so they will put him in a, in a institute.

So it's not, it's not about this. But We can use different different tool. In different tool, Chazal is saying, bad call does not exist today, we don't hear it. But if you get good advice from someone, that maybe will talk to you, so pay attention. Because maybe Hashem send him to you, to tell you, hey, that's what you have to do.

Now, don't hear to the bad advices, but, the voice, the voice that we say bad. Call the voice sometime come with your friend. Your friend talk to you, your father tell you something. Your mother tell you something. Sometime your kids tell you something. Look what happened with the,  you have told him, Abba, you, you, you, you have to go back to, to your, to him because if not, you know, you are worse than power.

Oh, this is existing here. 

Anyway, she say, you have to go back to your ma to our to, to your wife. And that's what he did. He didn't say, Hey, you are a baby who talk to you, you why you are putting yourself in this situation.  Ham was above of this because Abraham says. One moment, if a little girl says something like this, maybe I have to hear.

And that's what it's written, that Ve'elech ish mi b'et levi, ve'ikach isha b'et levi. So he understood the message from Hashem come from other people around you. And you have to pay attention. It's not something  that, you know, just I heard something. You Hashem Baruch come in different way.  But Hashem definitely answered your question.

For example, if you ask to be rich, and Hashem doesn't make you rich this year, so probably the answer was no for this year. Maybe you continue to ask, and maybe for the next year you will be rich. Or maybe it will be whatever you ask me if you want to be smart and you want to be talmid chacham, whatever you ask, whatever you want, you talk to  Hashem, the answer is sometime no, the answer is sometime not yet, the answer is sometime okay, give it to you.

And the next day, suddenly, everything is okay.  Right. So  this is fascinating. I, I always say that there's only three questions, three answers that God gives. There is yes,  not now and I have something better for you  There's never no  because We have to realize that if god said no if he closed the door and said not this is not the right door It's not because it's a no But it's because there's something better.

There's something that God knows that we don't know. So, this is what I really like.  We also ask in the tefillah, in tefillah of Yom Kippur, Rosh Hashanah, we say, malay misharot libenu letovah. Because sometimes you ask something and it's not for good. It's not for your own good. We see that many people that sometimes they have, they win something or they gain something and after they use it for the wrong way or they lose it and then they become even more poor than what they were before.

So if you are not, for example, if you are not  able to do it, so Hashem doesn't want to give it to you. This is, this is a big issue, I think, that we  have to understand that we talk to God, we ask Hashem, we also have a lot of answers, and we have to pay attention to what is the answer. Yes, so let me just put it together in English for people who are following and are trying really hard.

a  Bat Kol is a voice coming from God, you know, a voice from above, and the prophets were the ones who were able to catch that. And there was actually a school for prophets. To become a prophet, you had to learn to raise your level of knowledge. attentiveness to be able to catch these frequencies, right?

So it wasn't like, you know, yes, there were the people who just happened to be prophets naturally. But for the most part, people really trained themselves to meditate and listen to music and get to a place where their mind and their consciousness , were at a level where they can perceive these, these, these frequencies.

messages. Nowadays we don't have that. And so the way that you receive messages could be through people through messengers, right? The message comes with a messenger and sometimes it comes from the weirdest places. I hear a lot of women tell me my husband said this that the other And they think it's a negative thing.

And I say, wait, can we just listen to what he's saying for a minute? Cause maybe it's what you need to hear, right?  That's the exact answer that you needed to hear right now. And you just didn't want to hear it from him because it didn't feel right. You know, but. A lot of times you can learn a lot from children, because today the prophecy comes through children and through people who are  unwell mentally.

Would I, would that, is that accurate? You know, because if they say it, we can just laugh it off and not take it seriously. Or we have the power to choose to listen and be attentive. So, you know, we really, listening out for the answers through the messengers. And the other way, which is the way that I teach is to listen through reality.

You know, if you knock on the door and the door opens, that was the answer  because God will only do what is the right thing right now. He won't make things he doesn't want.  Yeah, but again, again, before, before everything, before we try to even ask Hashem Barach, first we have to understand that Hashem Barach, God, provides us all what we need.

We have to understand that We, we are, we are lucky that Hashem is with us and He provides us whatever you need. You don't miss anything. If you go around and you look around you, you don't miss anything. For example, exactly in the day that you were born, your mother became a, your mother became a mother  and she will take care of you.

Even if you didn't ask anything, you're a baby, you didn't say anything, you didn't even say ima yet. And what happened? Hashem take care of you by this messenger that's called mother or father. And  this is exactly  the message. The message of kabel et avicha v'atimecha is in the right side.

of the Luchot HaBrit, of the Torah, because we have to understand that, that parents taking care of a baby as a messenger from Hashem is Barach. We have three partners in a human being, and this is exactly the message. The message is as in the moment that you come to world, God take care that someone will take care of you.

And this is a big message because if, if then he took care of, of all my need. So I'm, why worry now when you are in 16, 17, 18, what, what will be your sustenance? Believe that Hashem will provide it to you. Hashem love is you.  Hashem loves all of Israel, Baruch Hashem. And He will provide you whatever you need.

And this is a, this is a huge emunah. That supposed to be simple as we begin with the story. If you believe that Hashem will give you life and kids and everything. So why you don't believe that Hashem can give you also sustenance or what you need. It can come from different places. But you just you just have to understand that Hashem first.

Provide all what you need. You want to ask above of this? Excellent, so ask! Talk to him. Yodei Hashem achshevot b'nei adam. Also, even without talking, Hashem knows what you need. Hashem knows what you need, and if you didn't get it yet, as you say, yeah, you didn't get it yet, but you will, you will, if it's really good for you.

  Hey, before we continue the episode, I want to ask you something. Are you ready to get answers from God directly? Feel more in love with your husband and more supported than ever? Run the business of your dreams without having to sacrifice any other part of your life? That is exactly what my one on one private coaching is for and I want to invite you, just you and me, For a free deep dive discovery call.

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  So here's the question. If God is already providing everything that you need,  then why do we even have to bother asking and actually asking?  It means that  I think that I miss it, but it's not meaning that I miss it. Maybe I don't miss it, but I think that I miss it, so I ask  to give it to me. It can be that I'm not missing it at all. 

It's just feeling, it's just feeling, or someone, or maybe I look at my friend, or I look at my neighbor, and I think, oh, he has a new car, maybe I want also a new car. But Hashem doesn't want me to have a new car, because if He wants me to have a new car, so I will have a new car. I will just decide to buy a new car. 

And this will be my value. That I want it. The problem is that we want sometimes that not something that we really want.  And we ask Hashem that it's not good for us. That's what we say before.  So this brings us back to the beginning of the conversation, and this is getting interesting people.  We said that God leaves a little bit of left in order for us to fill it and be co creators and do our mission in the world.

And. When we live our life, we feel lack, and that lack is not necessarily a reflection that God hasn't given us what we need. It's the lack that is supposed to motivate us to turn to God and have a conversation with Him. The connection is going to be stronger when you feel a lack and turn to God. Right because that's what the lack is coming to do So what you're saying is the lack isn't here to show you god is missing or there's something wrong with the calculation Or god isn't doing his job properly.

That's not what it's here to do. What it's here to do is to show you That you have to put in the effort that you have to become The vessel to receive the thing that you're lacking. So the lack is here to push us into that lack that we were talking about before. There's a lack so that you can become what you're meant to become here in this world. 

Is that accurate? We just want to add something that, you know, sometimes kids say, I want this or I need this. And the answer is, whatever you need, you have. The question is, if you want more,  you can ask. But whatever you need, you have. Hashem provided to you, whatever you need, you have already. Already, it means that already you have whatever you need.

You have mother, you have father, they take care of you. You have food, you have whatever you need. You have food, you have whatever you need.  You need, you have, but whatever you want, so continue to pray.  Okay. So let's talk about a person who has everything they need, you know, they have whatever, and you know, like you're saying, if you need it, you have it.

So if you don't have it, it must mean that you don't need it,  but you still want it. You still want it, right?  Yes, of course you want it because, okay. Okay. So if there's things, you know,  Yeah.  No, Rebbi Nachman says  that if you didn't get it from Hashem because you didn't ask enough.  So definitely you can continue to pray. 

It doesn't mean that you will get it, but definitely you didn't, you didn't pray enough for this.  Right. So, so I'm having a little bit of a hard time here and the hard time is coming from  is it okay to want and  Why do we have wands if everything we have we need and everything we need we have? 

So what are the wands?  Okay, I will answer this. I like the question because this is exactly the point. The point is, Hashem create a,  Will because Hashem wants to make this world better. So we have a will. It doesn't mean that I need it. It means that I want it. I want it. Sometime I want it and Hashem actually give us the thought to want it because Hashem want us that we will want something to make the world better. 

If you do it for someone else,  so it will be even chesed and it will be a lot higher level. But still even if you want it for yourself, this will that you have to this desire that you want more, it means that you are in a level that you're  willing to give something to have it. 

And it means, for example, let's say someone wants to work in computer. So the, if you want, and this is his willing, so he will go and learn this. And after when he will learn it and he knows how to solve problem in computer. So, He will know how to do it, and even it can be a good good parnose, good substance.

But if he does it for someone else,  so it will be also chesed. You understand? Meaning it's like the willing is good because you want the world to be better. If you know something and you are you're able to have it and to do it even more to other people and to make the world better.  So this is a good purpose. 

Okay, so the will is coming from God and it's here to  allow us to go above and beyond and  want something that is more than the default or the basics. So I'm thinking of King David who everything was fine, things were default, but he wanted God to have a home and this was  his idea and the prophet came and said, bingo, you got it.

You're the first one who thought about this. You get the credit. So I think when we are willing to want something  that, you know, that we want, we're willing to declare it and desire it and then go after it, what we're really doing is we're.  Improving on the basics. That's very, that's very good way to say.

I want to build on this and to tell you even, even more. I heard  from a very big rabbi, something very interesting says that one time, someone was orphaned and his father died from a certain disease.  This make of this boy to have a willing to be a doctor and to solve this problem. This boy became to become a really important doctor, and he really save a lot of lives because he  He had a missing father that, you know, Hashem make him to, you know, unfortunately, this time of the war, many, many kids became orphaned for in one minute, in one night.

And you know, it's very sad. But we don't know what is the purpose. You see many, many, many, many successful people that their story is very interesting and they say I was orphaned and this is what give me a motivation to do certain things. So, you know, I don't wish to anyone to be orphaned and that Hashem will give him a motivation in this way but definitely Hashem give motivation to People in very different ways and when, when you have the motivation and you have the willing, so this willing come to your mind because Hashem want you to, to have it.

And if it's good willing and you will take care of the, of this willing and you, you go in the right way, you can make the world better.  And that's what we say before that you can help God to make this world better.  Okay, so the Lach is here to motivate us to make the world better by going above and beyond the basic needs and really building on it. 

I love that. I think that's very cool.  Yeah, that's what Hashem, I think, provides us to understand. Hashem, Hashem, when He created the world He creates a very nice world. You see, you know, that one one of the things that I heard from my son that he says God could make everything in black and white, and it could be that you go out and you see  the world black and white, but Hashem wanted to be more interesting,  More, you know, more  ent. 

Very nice. So we make color and you have leaves. That's, you know, now it's like a, a fall. So we what we need  and that, that's what we have also to do. We have to try to get higher level  above of what we have. And this is the willing that make the world better.  I love that. Okay. So, you know, you can live in default land and just be like, okay, what I need, I have what I have.

I need, I don't need anything else. But then you're the things that you're feeling lack in  are here to motivate you to turn to God and to go above and beyond.  And actually become  in that is needed in order to fill those gaps. So it's, it's very exciting. I think, because it gives us the,  you know, it makes it legitimate to want. 

You know, a lot of people are scared to want because they've been told, Why do you want so much? What's wrong with you? And in reality, that want is something that's really here to serve. Exactly, exactly.  And we have to tell to Hashem, If I want something, it's because you put me a will in my mind and I want it.

So you have to help me to get it. So now it's your mission, Hashem. Talk to Hashem like you, like you talk to a friend. It's your mission, because you put me in my mind to, to, you know, to have a will for being this or that or why. So just help me now to get it. I need a tool, so I want the tool. And you can provide it to me. 

Okay, thank you.  It's like the egg and the egg and the end, but the but if you believe that God knows our our thinking and also he put the thing in our mind so he also has to provide our willing  to come out as he will do. And, you know, it's only missing it a lot. We have to pray to Hashem and to talk to Him and to ask Him, Please Hashem, help us to do our mission and to do it with your tools that you give us. 

Okay, that's really beautiful. What advice do you have for someone who's really Stuck. They want to, let's say, join a coaching program that costs a lot of money, or they wanna go do something that's expensive and they don't have the money, but they really want it. What is someone supposed to do in that situation? 

I heard something when,  if you have the willing, if you have in mind that you need something, so you'll find out how  to manage, and hashem will help you. How to manage? Sometime, sometime you don't even know where, where it comes. Meaning it's like now you don't have it, but maybe tomorrow you will have.

But if you have a good willing, if you have a strong willing and you tell to Hashem, you put the willing in my mind, so help me to get it, help me to get there. So we have to continue to talk to Hashem and we have to understand  who help us, who put it in my mind and he will help us to do it. So I think that in your question, for example, if I need something, it means that suddenly I need something and I have a will to do it.

So. Now I ask Hashem to provide me the way to, to get it. So it, it's, it's, it's continued to give you a force to give you a strength to, to continue to pray to Hashem and to tell him, okay, you give me a willing, you give me a want something, I want something. Give me now a the, the ability to do it if I need more money, so send me more money.

If I need more power, so get, get me more power. If I need more support, get me the support. If I need the understanding from my husband or my wife that I really need it, so maybe put in their mind or in his mind that he will understand that it's really something that I need now  and and he will help you.

Sometimes it's like just it's just time to, you know, Pray more that the other person will understand the need and suddenly you have a solution,  right? Yes, this is  this is so fun because  teach the calm method This is the method that I created right to create flow. It starts with connecting to yourself you have to know what you want and When you get in touch with what you want Then step two is ask for abundance.

You have to turn to God and say, this is what I want. Now, if this matches up with your will, and if this is in alignment,  show me, guide me, help me, and then step three is listen for the answer. Once you asked God to show you how to get there, it's up to him to show you. And it could come through messengers.

It could come through reality.  Taking action and seeing results.  And whatever it is that happens, it's going to show you what God wants. At this point, you're already up in the air flying because you're like, Oh my gosh, it's an amazing experience. But there's one more step and it's called master a higher level of consciousness.

What we just did was we went half circle towards, you know, forward. We have to bring it back to ourselves.  And we have to be able to celebrate what just happened to be able to say We have to be able to come back and say, wow, I see evidence of why  this is working.  Let's talk a little bit about that.  Yeah, I like the method.

I like this way. I just want to  remind you that first you have everything you need.  If this is the attitude from the beginning, that if Hashem put you in this situation, that's what Hashem wants you to do. So first, you have all what you need, and Hashem put you, God put you in this situation, because that's how Hashem works.

He put you in a situation. Now, from here, you can build whatever you want. You can say, okay, what is your willing, what do you want to do? And this is, by my belief, what That it doesn't come from nothing. That you want something  if, if you miss something and you want it, it's not because you miss it, because you need, you need it because all what you need, you have, it's because ashamed put you in mind that you want to make the world better.

You want to make your family better. You work, you want to do your your relationship. Better. You want to, to do something better. So you wake up in the morning and Hashem suddenly put you in my, in your mind that you want to do something better now, how it happened. So begin to ask, begin to ask to open your eyes to, to know where, what is the source to, to do it and what are the tools that they need?

And God willing, and I pray here with all of you, that  God will provide us with all what we need.  And and we'll have what you need and what we want.  Like this, the world will be better. And if you do chesed with this, So, if you do something good with this to someone else,  it even better, make it better, and make that Hashem want you to stay in this world longer time. 

I love that. So, here is something that this brings all together.  People have a hard time wanting because they think that by wanting, they're not being grateful for what they have.  Now, if I want more money, it means I'm not grateful for the money I have. If I want a bigger house, does that mean that I'm not grateful for the house I have?

If I want more kids, then does that mean that I'm not grateful for the kids I have. And what you're saying is everything you have, you need, and everything you need, you have, this is already given, and you are completely allowed to have both  feelings simultaneously because they don't contradict.  You're willing, your want is going to build on what you already have. 

Yes, and the purpose, the purpose is very important, the purpose. Let's say that I want money. So the question is why I want money. I want to buy a bigger house. First, I have a house, I have what I need. And if I want bigger house, it's maybe because I need, or I think that I need bigger house. So let's begin from here.

And now Hashem put me in my mind that I need to make it a bigger house. So now I have to ask Hashem  to help me to get there.  And this is exactly the message. First is the purpose. When I want something, what's the purpose? Meaning it's like, are you really want it for something good or for something something real?

Or you just want it because your neighbor had it or because your friend had it? So if you want it for a good purpose, God willing, He will hear your prayer and He will provide it to you. And Hashem has His way to provide everything. You don't tell to Hashem how to provide you. Hashem suddenly put in mind of a, your father or your mother.

You know what? I'll give him a, I'll give him a present. Or if if you have a friend that he doesn't, he doesn't want something, we don't need, I give him a story. I have a story of a friend of mine that he doesn't have a lot of money  and he has two, two small kids. And one of the kids told to Abba, Abba, I really want bicycle. 

And Abba told him, you have one  Abba in Shammai, you want bicycle,  pray to Hashem.  So first, this is a good education, but also it works. You know, the boy without thinking twice, he went to the corner and he prayed to Hashem that he need bicycle and he want bicycle. You will not believe what happened after two days.

A friend of the parents came with a bicycle and they say, look, we bought it to our son and he said that it's too small for him and it's not the right color, etc, etc. So he doesn't want it. Here is a bicycle. Maybe you want it. So the boy was very happy. Well, and the parents were even more happy because they don't have to pay for this and they actually give good education for the kid And he pray for a share to a shame and now we get the bicycle  Yeah, I think this is a very good point also in marriage a lot of women say my husband doesn't give me or my husband won't let me buy and Your husband is not the source of so much So anything, right?

He is your husband. Yes. But the source of money, the source of, you know, abundance, God, so stop being so dependent on my husband. Won't give me a friend to God. And there was one client of mine that said, I really want a prayer book and I can't, you know, he won't buy it for me. And I just really want it. And I keep asking him and he won't give it to me.

I said, go ask for one, you know, go ask the right source. Yes. Turn up. God can give it to you. That's what I'm saying. The mighty power. Same thing. The neighbor was going through her stuff, decluttering, and said, Do you need any prayer books? Because we're giving all these away. She didn't only get one, she got a whole box. 

Right? So, you just have to allow God to do His work. Stop trying to control it and tell Him how to run the world. Let Him do His job. He knows what He's doing.  Right. Right. Right. We don't have to teach God how to provide it to us. He knows. He knows how to do it. If you want to do it, if you think that this is the right time, so it will happen.

It will happen. And we have to believe in this. And we have to believe that when we talk to Hashem, we talk seriously to God, and we don't just pray because we pray. We pray, and we mean what we say.  Say a little more about that. What does that mean, to mean what you say?  It means first, you know, most of the time, especially religious people, they think that they are religious and they believe, they think that they believe in God. 

You ask them how many words in the tefillah you pay attention to what you say, it will be very, very, very little percentage. If you want really to talk to God, So first, you have to remember that I say, Shibit Yashem L'Nikdit Amid, that you have to understand, like God is standing in front of you. When, when you understand that someone sits in front of you, so you're a lot more serious than you just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

And this is what what many times I say to students, you stop blah, blah, blah in the Tefillah, especially in America, that people don't understand what they're saying. And you know, sometimes 30 years, they just blah, blah, blah, the filah.  And it's very sad. I tell you this too. It's very sad. I talk many times about, with my students about this.

Stop blah, blah, blah it because if you will blah, blah, blah it now, you and you will be 50 and you blah, blah, blah it.  You know, maybe, maybe one day you will say, why I blah, blah, blah it?  Maybe I have to understand what he's saying, or maybe I have to stop doing it. And unfortunately, that's the reason that  many kids of the derech,  because they don't really take seriously what they do.

They put filin, they pray, but they didn't understand anything that what they say. They just do it as a ritual, because this is what everybody around them do. What happened when not everybody around you doing it, so you just have to there. That's it.  So you have to mean what you say and say what you mean.

I'm thinking, you know, if we actually thought of God as, as someone who was right in front of us,  If you go into a meeting, like a business meeting and say, you know, just memorize the text and just like say it really quickly to get through it and the other person on the other side is like, and you want me to invest in this? 

I don't even know half the words you said,  you know, it doesn't make any sense. So if we take it seriously, then yeah, it's a big wake up call for all of us. I'm thinking. First  to stop and think, you know, take a pause. Yeah, I agree. I agree. When you say, 

I don't want to go all over the,  but whatever you ask from God, you have to really mean it. And if you don't have your mind, hundred percent of this. So you actually didn't pray, you just blah, blah, lied, unfortunately. Anyway, this is like a different topic by itself, that how we pray to Hashem. But if you understand that God is standing with you, near you, in front of you, so definitely you will change your attitude for good.

And then you can ask whatever you want or whatever you need and whatever and ever. Because this is like, this is would be the, the, the, You know, the smallest problem, what I need, or what I have, or what I want.  The question first, if you understand that God Provide you all what you need. And if God, if you understand that God meant that now you will be in this situation.

Now, right now, right now, God wants us to talk now about Emunah. Now, right now, God wants us to be in the middle of conversation about something that can help maybe other people to focus on what they're supposed to be focused and not about other things. So, right now. If I believe that now, right now, what happened now in our meeting is because Hashem wanted it to happen and Hashem gave us the power and the tools to have it.

So this is a very good beginning to continue to the next prayer.  Okay, this is very good. This has been wonderful. Is there anything else that you would like to add before we end?  Yeah, if we're talking about prayer, I think that everybody, everybody pray.  You know, Matir Hasurim, and everybody pray for the Shpuhim.

And everybody pray for the Nitzachon. And everybody pray for the hostage in Gaza. And everybody pray for the soldier that they will come back in Shalom. So we all have to pray.  With intention that shame will hear our prayer and we give us all what we need in this war, and they save our life and save the life of the soldier and the life of dos. 

Amen.  Please God.  Okay. This was wonderful. This is something that is a real treat for me to be interviewing my own father and my own podcast. This is extremely exciting. So thank you for joining me and Thank you everyone for listening and for watching  Make sure you come back next week for another episode and don't forget to be connected for real.

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