132. Feel Confident in Your Clothing

Chana Rachel Gaffin is a graduate of Shenkar College of Engineering and Design with a degree in fashion. She designs colorful modest activewear: Chanabana Activewear, and also teaches art lessons. Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman is a marriage coach for women in business. Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman is a marriage coach for women in business. Join their interesting conversation modesty and feeling good in your clothing. 

 Welcome to the Connected For Real podcast. I'm Rebbetzin Bat-Chen Grossman, a marriage coach for women in business. And my mission is to bring God's presence into your life, into your marriage and into your business. Let's get started. 

 And we are live Welcome everyone to the connected for real podcast. I'm revitin, but hen grossman and today we are talking about clothing and marriage and specifically modest active wear and i'm super excited to have with me chana, who is the owner of chanavana   Hannah, introduce yourself and let us know a little bit about you and the background and how you got into this.

And then we can, you know, have a conversation and really get into it.  Okay. So hi, thank you so much for having me on the show. I'm Hannah, Rachel, Hannah, Rachel Gaffen, and I am the designer of Chanabana active wear.  I was originally born in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. I came to Israel when I was around three, grew up in a very Americanized little bubble. By the name of Beit Shemesh  and I kind of went through my own journey of ups and downs within, within Judaism.

I had times where I wasn't as modest, but I still loved running and I would just wake up every morning at the time I was living in Australia and I would just go for my morning run in my beautiful, colorful active wear in these types of colors and just like neons and purples and everything. And  I just love that experience.

It just infused me for excitement for the day. And I felt like that was such an integral part of my life that when I started becoming more observant, I was totally stuck because I couldn't wear all my beautiful, beautiful, beautiful active wear. And like, I didn't have anything that was modest. That was, you know, in the same vibe.

So I created the mind.   How'd you end up in Australia if you were in Israel? 

In Israel, we have something called Sherot Laumi, and like, also, the army, it's basically national service. After you finish your high school, you do something for Israel, and then there's a thing called Tziyul Achei Atzava, it's like a trip after after your services, and initially I was going to go to New Zealand, but something just I don't know, it just happened to be in the end Australia, and I went, so I flew to Australia.

And I absolutely fell in love with Australia.  Yes, that is a very beautiful place to be.  Yeah. That's very cool.  My sister went and I sort of lived vicariously through her. She had a blog and she used to send us videos about how, you know, how everything is and all sorts of things. So my parents also went a couple of times.

I've never been. But, you know, life is long. I still have time. Not that I'm planning on leaving Israel anytime soon, cause I'm very comfortable here and very happy, but I also really love traveling. So who knows? But yeah, Australia is one of those places that's on the list.  Yeah, I feel like my Neshama is alive in two places.

I feel like it's in Israel and in Australia, out of all the other countries. It's just one of those relaxing places. People are nice and the scenery is just, it's a different, it's a different universe. You actually feel like it's a different universe. So strongly recommend.  Yeah, I mean, you know, it's also gigantic.

So you say Australia, it's like saying, you know, like  everywhere there, there are, I'm sure there are really beautiful places and I'm sure there are some places where you're like, eh, it's not my, you know, not my thing, but like you and you have to end up exactly, where you feel the most alive and it looks like you did.

So that's really fun. Okay, cool. So you came back from Australia. How long were you in Australia? I was going back and forth for around seven years.  So basically I flew for three months initially, and then the three months turned into a year. I was like, that's it. I love this place. And then I flew back to Israel and I was like, wait, I'm not done with Australia.

So I kind of went back and forth and  I every summer I would just go there. I was working in Australia and I would just go there to basically pay for my college degree. So it was really great.  That's super fun. Cool. So then you did college here in Israel and you studied fashion. Yeah. So when I, when I was like coming back to my final year of fashion school, after my vacation in Australia I was super psyched to Start my final collection  and I had this really beautiful inspiration actually from the Great Barrier Reef in Australia for those of you who don't know it's actually the largest organism in the world.

It's like you have all these beautiful thousands of fish underwater. They're all iridescent and colorful and they're so beautiful.  And like in Shankar, like the final year of fashion school is supposed to be like the biggest climax of your life. They bring in all these people in the industry and they just like, it's, it's a very big boomerang for your career.

If you do, if you know the right people and do the right things. And I was ready to just come up with this collection of evening gowns. And like everyone that knew me from fashion school knew that like, I was like, The most like skimpy dresses and like, you know, revealing bathing suits type of person and I was like, okay I'm gonna come back now and design this extravagant collection of like these beautiful dresses of underwater prints and everything and I started designing and I just Something was stuck.

Something was really stuck. I didn't manage design because I kind of felt like  my neshama was like wanting to explore tzniyut. It was wanting to get closer to yadut, to Judaism, to modesty. And I kind of felt a very big block because as a designer in my years of designing, I never really designed anything modest.

It was all very like the complete polar opposite.  So instead of graduating with a final collection, there was an alternative to writing a paper for, you know, for the university. So I wrote a paper all about the history of modesty  and modesty in fashion. And I graduated. And then what I ended up doing with the inspiration, instead of making an evening wear collection, I ended up just launching my brand of modest active wear with the same beautiful colors that I loved just instead of for the evening for, you know, women who want to feel beautiful and still stay modest. 

I love it.  Yeah, so it all started just like on the street. I just sewed for myself a skirt, like I had an entire wardrobe I couldn't wear anymore. Beautiful stuff that like I spent a lot on and I was super invested in, but I couldn't wear it. And back then all of the girls were wearing like jean skirts and their husband's t shirts for running.

And like I said to myself,  running is not supposed to be one of those schvitzy like things where you feel yuck. Like if you are a runner, I don't know. Do you do any type of running?  Not so much. I'm more of a swimmer. Oh, okay. Well, also, if you're going swimming, you're going swimming, sometimes it's on like, you know, vacation with your husband, you want to feel, you want to feel sexy, you want to feel beautiful and attractive.

And also when you're running, you want to feel good about yourself, especially like, I don't know if you're a businesswoman, and people see you on the street, they don't want to see you just all like schvitz, you want to look nice, you want to look like, you know, good, feel good about yourself. So I was like, I'm going to turn that back into the experience where religious women can have the same thing.

And it all started with like, you know, an outfit for myself and then, it expanded, it turned into running sets and then also swim sets. And and yeah, today it's a fully fledged, really unfolding  that's amazing. That's really amazing.  There was once an advertisement  that would pop up on YouTube of like, this is not a pajama.

And, you know, and this is not pajamas and this is not pajamas. And they're basically saying like your t shirt that   like you had in high school is not supposed to be pajamas. And they were trying to sell that like you should really buy.  Something that makes you feel excited about being in your house and going to sleep and getting ready and whatever.

I feel like the same thing with exercise clothes, with swimwear, you know, like we could totally just throw something on and move on and not care, but there's something really powerful about yes.  Taking the time  and really  giving it  the respect it needs. Because it's what you're wearing.

Yeah in our house, we have something called fancy pajamas. It's like,  It's like, I once got one for myself. I flew to Miami, and I was like, I saw this beautiful pajama set,  and I got it for myself, and, I was like wearing it  when I brought it home, I was like, yeah, look at my new pajamas.

My new pajama set. My husband's like, What? You got fancy pajamas? Like, I also want fancy pajamas, and so I am for his, like, hot And then I'm getting also like a nice pair of like, you know, 100 percent cotton, like a pajama set, you know, with the collar and, and, and, you know, and we have like pajama, we have, we have professional fancy pajamas now.

And it turns the sleeping experience into completely different. It's like, instead of just doing like a makeshift, it's like, you get into your fancy pajamas and you feel like it's almost like a ceremony of like a deep sleep. Like I have my pajamas on, man. Like, you know, let's go sleep.  Right. Cool. Yeah.

Yeah. I think it gives you permission to transition. You know, there's like things that  I guess they call it rituals, right? It's like things that your brain starts to calculate. Oh, look at that. You know, we're starting to move towards  this activity now. So you're prepping your brain  completely. And there's also this book, it's called the one thing, and it speaks about how everybody has like one thing that if they do, you know, Their whole rest of their day is going to flow.

And I feel a lot of women that I, that, that have my active where they say the second they put on their active wear, it's like they exercise and after they exercise. They're more energized and after they're more energized, they just show up to all their meetings with more plays, with more, you know, like more presentness.

And I think that , it really can boil down to the small act of like what you put on in the morning, what clothes you wear.  Yes. So let's get into how your clothing affects your marriage, because I know that I, and I also love your story about business into marriage and all of that. So do you want to tell us a little bit about that ?

So I launched my business when I was around 26 years old,  I was fully invested in the business and I was like full on every day, all day till the middle of the night, just business, business, business. And while I was doing that, you know, I did just come back into being like more Orthodox. So like I was new in the dating scene and like, you know, coming from a secular world back into Judaism at 26 and starting to date, you don't have That many people  who understand both sides of the spectrum.

So I knew I wanted a guy who was very who like knows also about the world, but also about Judaism. So my dating journey started and my dating journey continued around. Yeah. Let's say I started dating actually around 25, my dating journey continued for seven years. It was very long and lonely journey.

And  it was hard. It was actually like the hardest seven years of my life, where you go from one day to another day. And you know, like you get emotionally invested and that doesn't go through. And anyway, eventually at the age of 32, it worked out for me and Hashem sent me my man. And it was really, really special and really great.

It was just, I was sharing with you that. While I was dating, I kind of felt like my whole energy, it was very hard for me to balance my energy between running a business and dating. And like, I was feeling very accomplished with myself. Like I got to go on TV. I got these like really, really great big milestones.

And  every single time when someone kind of graduated me, I was just like, I really just wish that I was married and starting my family. Like for me, That's where I really wanted to be and I decided at the age of 30 that I'm stopping the brand I'm taking a break and I'm investing my entire emotional energy Just to finding my husband and that's what I did.

 I put my business on the side And I just really focused on dating. And that's when I met my husband   and thank God, today, today we're actually back together at it. And I have my husband as a partner, he helps me and we run the business quite like together, you know and I've kind of, it feels kind of like I'm relaunching because it's like, everything is new.

The website is new. He really helps me, break down. Everything I need to know about just everything about the products about the way we sell and it's just it's a really big bracha And it's kind of  almost like a second shot at really running it properly  with the person with my person  Right.

That's really beautiful. I love that you were feeling the imbalance and you knew what you needed to do.  And then now you're, you're back into business. So it's not like you had to, you know, stop it forever, but more like I need to recenter. Give me a minute, you know, and then now I'm feeling aligned now.

It feels good. And so there's like a really nice Shift of energy, but not really giving up any part of you which is really important  Yeah, definitely at a certain points actually in that break someone was like, you know, if I give you a hundred and fifty thousand dollars Would you sell me your business? 

What? No. , this is my baby. I'm not done. I'm not done with it yet.  I didn't see it sore yet. I'm not done with this.  Right.  That's really cool. And now it's actually really taken off because of the tights that you have. Tell us about those leggings that have a special pocket on the side.

Yeah, so I have a new pair of leggings. It's called the Holster Ready Leggings. Ever since this war broke out  on October the 7th, There are so many women who have been applying, been applying for a gun license. Actually, there have been over 180, 000 applications for a gun license since the war. The number is rising constantly. 

And the majority of these actually are women  because, you know, if their husbands are in Miluim or like in, in their duties in the army, the ladies are the ones that need they need, they need guns. They need, you know, protection. Anyway, so ever since the war broke out, all these ladies, like, they just, like, shift their way over to me after shul and they're like, Chana Rachel I really don't know what to do.

I have a gun over here and they show me their gun and their gun is so obvious  because most of the ladies just put their gun either on their waist or they put it like, you know, a normal legging pockets, which stick out right out of the bulge of the hips. And they're super unflattering.

And they say, we need a solution for our guns. So there was one woman by the name of Ilana, just from my gym and came to me. She was like, we're making this happen. So she came over, she told me what she was looking for. You know, she wants to be concealed. She wants to be comfortable. She doesn't want something all over, you know, like on the back, it's a little bit uncomfortable and she wants it to be balanced.

So we designed the perfect leggings together and And we created it. And it's just a wonderful pair of leggings. So you could put your gun. Either straight in the pocket or on the holster on the pocket on one side and then the other side of the leggings also has Another pocket you could put in your phone you put in your keys It's completely balanced So it doesn't hurt any side of your back and also when you have a gun right on your back It really wears you down in the back.

So it's just a lot more comfortable  I'm wearing them right now, actually, because it's freezing cold outside and like they're nice, long, cozy, and it's just it's a wonderful product. And I just didn't realize how much it would take off and  just how many religious women  carry guns. Yes.   I would say that.

You know, having all the men just completely drain out of the town in one day made everyone realize how, we're the ones holding the down the fort, you know, like there's basically women and children here and we're all in a gated neighborhood. Like there is nothing that we can do to protect ourselves and that big aha. 

 Was a big wake up for everyone. And so I definitely, you know, and a lot of religious women are, are applying. I think just because.  makes sense. They have a lot of Children. They have this inner need to protect.  And it makes it makes total sense. It actually came up.  We were driving somewhere really like, you know,  far off.

We went to a farm to go Strengthen them cause  one of the guys who owns the farm was killed in the war. And so we went to, see it and try to help out with what we can, whatever. It was a really great field trip, I have to say. And one of the things was in the car, we were talking about it because one of the ladies already has her gun.

The other one is thinking of getting her gun.  And then she said, yeah, you know, I was, I was hearing about these leggings, you know, Hanabana has  this new thing. And I was like, actually, I'm having her on my podcast this week. So it worked out really fun for me to, you know, feel special.

But I think it's one of those really great. inventions because where else are you gonna put it? And then when we got to the farm, the lady in the farm says she keeps hers in her boot because  it just fits and it doesn't bother her. So I was like, Oh, there's another invention right there. 

I wonder what it'd be like to have a gun in my boot. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Well, she seemed to not really mind. It was just sitting there in her shoe. I was like, cool. And you couldn't tell it wasn't bothering her. She seemed to be very comfortable. So that was really interesting.  Yeah. I think  what really catches me by,  By like, moments of like, I want a gun is when I'm sitting in traffic.

I just, I live right outside of Jerusalem and every time I go by the checkpoint, there's traffic. And, as you probably heard over the past few months, there have been  quite a few what do you call it? Pigouin? Just scenarios right at those, at those scenes. And,  they, they call it like a sitting duck when you're just sitting there in traffic.

And I was just talking to my friend about this yesterday. She says to me, when she gets to that checkpoint, she doesn't know what's more safe to sit, to just, she doesn't know what to do to either sit in traffic and like, you know, be at that place where you're vulnerable or to just drive straight through an Arab village, which is the other option. 

And  I was  thinking about it. It's true. You really, you know, it's a really good question. But like when I was sitting in traffic the other day, I was filled with the type of  fear of like anything can happen and I don't have any protection on me. And if I only had my leggings on with a gun on me right now, I would feel so much more protected, you know, like we're living in this reality where normally like you see this on, on TV shows and Lucifer, like, of like all this horror that's happening.

And now it's like, it's in real life. It's not, it's like in the movies, but it's in real life. And I think that, you know, these desperate times just call for different measures, you know, for, for us, religious women to go apply for these guns and  to kind of take it in our own hands and, and really take charge of our security for ourselves.

  Hey, before we continue the episode, I want to ask you something. Are you ready to get answers from God directly? Feel more in love with your husband and more supported than ever? Run the business of your dreams without having to sacrifice any other part of your life? That is exactly what my one on one private coaching is for and I want to invite you, just you and me, For a free deep dive discovery call.

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  Yeah. And I, I love that you were able to come up with a design that, you know, feels good, looks good, and also does it make it obvious that you're wearing a gun? Cause a lot of women, as. You know, as strong minded as you are, and as like as much as you want to have one, you're like, but  I don't necessarily want to be wearing it, you know, as like, hey, look at me, everyone, right?

 It doesn't feel as comfortable. So there's, there's a really big value in what you're doing and sort of creating a way for it to be modest, you know, in a way. This is, I guess, the only word I could come up with.  Yeah,  it's funny. I was thinking about it, how like, does this match the concept of my brand?

Because my brand really is supposed to be modest active wear, but I kind of sell these leggings as a piece, which alone, they're not so modest, but I think it's really, what you wear on top of them that makes it modest. But also it's very important to point out that like I'm wearing these leggings right now and it's really not only for guns like it has like a really nice high waist and  a fabric waist as well.

So like also if you're pregnant you can also wear it then as well. But the high waist it's very body contouring so it just like Brings everything in and it just makes you feel, it's like, it's almost like a  Mechatev, like Spanx, just like, it's not so, so, so tight. Just makes you all put together. And speaking of what you wanted to speak about before, like when you feel put together, you show up better and you show up more collected and just more confident.

And yeah, it's like a pair of leggings that gives you confidence.  I love it. I love it. The pair of leggings that gives you confidence. I think all of your brand is all about feeling confident in your own skin. Like, you know, if you're a runner and you start becoming religious and you're like,  what am I going to do now?

You know, how am I supposed to cover up and run and feel good about myself and being able to come up with a solution that makes you feel. Good in your own skin is really, really important. Yeah, definitely.  A lot of the women  that buy from me, they, they tell me, they say,  like  your products are not cheap.

And yet I choose them because I looked at all the other brands out there and  your designs are  The most beautiful, like the most flattering. And like, you know, when someone, when someone else that tries it on, like they, they feel it, I had this women who is two weeks after a C section the other week at the Jerusalem Marathon Expo, she came and she was like, this is the first time that I actually felt like a human being ever since the birth. 

And that was  the biggest compliment to me. Cause, I remember what it was like being after a C section. Like I didn't feel like a woman. I felt like a whale. Are you kidding me? Like also with the whole pumping milk, you feel like a cow. And then you end. Feel like nothing fits you anymore and your legs are bloated and your body is like, what?

I don't even recognize myself anymore. And then slowly it took me probably four or five months until I started like feeling good about myself again. But still like to be able to feel like a woman and to feel good about yourself and to put on something that would get you even more excited to exercise and exercise also makes you feel better about yourself, movement and flow.

And when you're outdoors, fresh air, like it's just.  An experience that is invaluable. It's an item that is invaluable to feel the best that you can feel.  Yes. So let's talk about marriage and how that is affected because, you know, I think it's really important to tie it all together.  What do you think  about feeling good in your clothes, feeling confident, you know, feeling put together and then how that affects your marriage. It's a really good question. I'll just like kind of walk you through my own, I guess what it was like for me. So when I just got married,  wanted to look the best all the time.

Like my husband would come home from work and I'd make sure that my clothing is on perfectly and that my makeup is on and my wig is in place and I'd get all like put together. And then slowly, you know, after Shana Rishona, it's like, you don't really care as much, you know, you're busy, like, especially after you have a kid, it's like, you know,  If you're just out of bed and functioning properly and you pumped enough milk for your baby and, you managed to put food in your body, that's great, you know?

And then,  your husband comes home and, like, you're not always as put together. So it's just, like, a part of life. And then, I guess, once your baby is a little bit older, Maybe then, like, you know, you start getting back to yourself. I had many years being single. So like, I know what clothes I like.  I like feeling put together.

It's very important for me. So I may not look like, you know, a hundred percent all the time. But  when we do go out on date night and I do put on, you know, like my, my best clothing and I get myself done up, I feel so beautiful and, I show up more and I'm  more emotionally available, more confident.

And it completely makes a difference. And, you know, there are many times when I put my makeup on and like I put on, I feel really  great about myself,  not for him, but more like for me, you know, like whenever I have like, you know, a big event, I'll get dressed up and I don't know, like, it's like you get dressed up and you want to get out there.

You want to go. Be seen interact. I don't know. It's it gives you like the right step. What's the expression in English? It gives you the right step forward  the bet your best foot forward. So if you have a way of doing that  Why not? I love that. I love that. And so last year i'm just thinking back to my experience last year.

I Swam across the kenneret  with a group of women and I did the 2k because it was my first time and it was really beautiful and really intense. Just because there were so many women. I think there was like 400 or 500 women who all did it together. So it was an experience. It was definitely cool.

And some women were Trying to be modest, but it really slowed them down because of the type of modest wear that they were wearing and, there were a little bit  of talks about, is it really serving you in such a swim when you're, you know, women only and whatever, but  I think overall  it really changes the way you feel about yourself when you feel really good in what you're wearing and. I don't want it to come from a place of like, Oh, I have to, so I'll just do it. And it's like, fine. I checked off the box. I'm like, you feel the energy and what I'm saying, right? There's like this like ickiness about being modest.

And that's not the energy we want for ourselves. It's not the energy we want to, you know, give over to our kids and to the people around us. And it's really important. And that's why I, I really felt compelled to bring you on to the podcast. It's really important for me, for women to know that there is a way to make it feel really good and to not just check the box, but to feel amazing about it. 

Yeah, it's so important for women to know. I really value what you're doing, I think in 2024 more than ever. Women need to know that they can look their best in sneeze,  modest bathing suits and running, and they can, you know, get out and just like you, just like you perform better on a date when you're dressed up, you can perform better in your running and in your swimming when you're in Chanabana,  you know, like it's, it  affects everything.

It's a huge impact.  Yeah, I love it.  You that you swam two kilometers. Oh my gosh, you're so you're like a real swimmer. It  was, oh my gosh, it was such a story. So first of all, I learned to swim when I was a kid. And they threw me into the pool and said, swim. And I have like traumas from it. I did not like my swimming instructor when I was like, whatever, five, six years old. And then I, you know, fine. So I knew how to swim. I knew how to save myself, but I didn't actually enjoy it. I didn't swim. When we would go to the pool, I would just play in the water. I wouldn't swim. It wasn't a thing I did. And I didn't like when the water got in my eyes. And I didn't like it getting in my ears.

I like getting my nose. I was like, I was really not. taught properly, you know, to make it fun. I was sort of taught enough to survive. And as an adult, I started doing water exercise. You know, like aerobics in the water. And that was really fun for me. Cause you didn't have to put your head in the water.

You're just in the water and you're moving and you're, you know, the body, the water is holding you. So your body isn't as heavy. And especially during pregnancies, cause my last four pregnancies were all in the summer. So, you know, like July, August. So the entire summer I would exercise through the pregnancy in the water and I didn't feel the weight and it made it so much better.

And, and it was, it was just like a life changer. Like once I found what works for me, like being in the water feels really good. I turned to the instructor and said, why don't we teach Women who don't know how to swim or don't swim as well.  Like let's do a class for adults, you know, for adult women. And I want to be in it.

So I organized it because I wanted it. And I learned in like maybe five sessions, really good swimming techniques and how to put your head in the water, how to blow bubbles and how to, you know, make it feel not as, uncomfortable and the hands and the feet and whatever, like the body movements, all the things that I was able to perfect and just take to the next level.

And just being able to do that one time, gave me the confidence to start swimming. And a long time later, suddenly the instructor told me, That she just did this. She just swam across the Kinneret and I have to come with her next year. And I was like, no way I'm not doing it. That's crazy.

I've never swam before. Like I can't even do a full lap in a big pool. Like I'm too tired, blah, blah, blah. I had all these stories about it. And she's like, no, I'm telling you, you're doing it with me next year. And, along the year, she kept reminding me, like, we're doing this together. I was like, yeah, no, no. 

But then. She said, you know, I think that you can do it if you start practicing right after Passover because the swim is in the end of May and  I was like really, you know, just two and a half months of practice I can swim two kilometers like even if I never swim laps and I never do anything So she's like, yeah, you just have to practice twice a week and you'll do it  and I trusted her And I went with her, she took me to the pool first time.

She's like, okay, start swimming. And I did like 10 laps and I almost collapsed. And I was like, Oh my gosh, that was terrible. I could never do this. Blah, blah, blah. You know, and you have all these stories in your head. And with time,  I was able to do more and more laps and I got used to, you know,  the energy. 

Ups and downs that you have throughout the, throughout the, the experience. I'm sure you have that also in running, like in the beginning, you're like, yes. And then you get tired and then you get energy again. So it was the same thing with swimming.  And then one day I was like, Oh my gosh, I think I did it.

I did 80 laps. Like that's two kilometers. And she's like, you did it. That's it. Now you just have to be ready for it. And it was an amazing experience. I just felt really accomplished when I was out. I felt very,  very proud.  That was a very cool experience.  Wow. Sounds magical. I remember when I used to go swimming in Beit Shemesh where they had a pool I used to do also 80 laps and I remember describing to a friend the sensation of like, right after the 80 laps, it's like your brain is in a different place and especially if you go into the sauna right after, you feel like you're, you're high on like drugs, just better.

It's all natural. And it's just. That's an experience. And I'm guessing even like doing that in the Kinneret, Kinneret is such a magical  place, just like, you know, in Israel, in the most beautiful place of Israel. It's such a really relaxing, just.  body of water. So I'm sure it even made it more special for you knowing that it's there. 

And you know what? I think was the coolest thing was that I really visualized ahead of time what I want it to be like. And I said to myself, I want to look at the view and I want to be present. Like, I don't want to rush through it and feel like I just need to get to the other side. Because I'm in the canary.

I want to really enjoy it. You know, when you're in the pool doing laps, what are you looking at the big posters on the side? Like there's not really much to see, right? But when you're in the canary, you're like, every time I picked up my head, I saw the, you know, the mountain range and I saw the most beautiful views and it gave me so much strength.

And so part of my visualization was that I was going like at the last stop, because, you know, they have these. So at the last rest stop, I was going to stop, I was going to get onto the rest stop and like really legit stop and enjoy and take deep breaths and really be there.  And, and then after I was done with that, I swam the last little bit to get to the finish line and I didn't care how long it took me.

I was just happy to be done and to have had the experience that I wanted, you know, not like a rushed experience, but more like, you know, An intentional conscious experience of, of really being present with it. So that was really fun.  So so just like you, I also have my own podcast and I recently brought this lady, yeah, Al Cohen

on to the show. And she's a professional running inspector. And she was sharing with me how back in the day they had these groups of ultra runners in Mexico who would just run, they would run barefoot and they would run for like ultra marathon today. It's considered like 50 kilometers in a marathon.

It's really long runs. And she said that  at the front of these packs,  who was at the front of the pack? It was the grandmother. The grandmother was always at the front of the pack, not because she ran the fastest, because she was the most persistent. And she ran at her own pace, but she ran such long distances.

And I think it's so relevant also like for motherhood, because in motherhood, like, you know, Especially when you get married and  you get pregnant, not everyone has the easiest pregnancy and like very often there are also lots of miscarriages like one in four is like a miscarriage, you know, so you get pregnant but  you can't be too excited because first you have to wait for like four months and to make sure that it's not a miscarriage and then after that you have to wait, not get too excited because maybe it's like a Like, you know, like a high risk pregnancy and then you need to go on bed rest.

This is all like, you know, I've had like these experiences, but like  every stage and then you have the baby and then the baby is sleepless nights and then it's really wonderful, but then you can get engorged. Like there's always  up and down, up and down, up and down that like wherever you are, whether you're pregnant, whether you're before pregnancy and you want to get pregnant, whether you like wherever, however many kids you have, I kind of feel like it's such an invitation to just be present where you are. 

Try to enjoy where you are because  there's always going to be something to worry about.  Like if you can just ride the wave of  enjoying where you are, being present where you are and  just looking around to see a beautiful picture of your son with a cuckoo on his head or just like, I don't know, just like enjoy, just enjoy how you feel in the outfit or like just enjoy the small pleasures.

I kind of feel like it's really the only way to go about being a mother.  Right.  Yep. I, I love it that, you know, there's  There's this thing,   when I was in high school, we were almost graduating and our principal came and told us that you can either stress about what's the next step, what's coming and, wait, you know, wait for it, wait for it, wait for it.

Right. It's like, I just can't wait to get married. I just can't wait to have a baby. I just can't wait for this baby to sleep through the night. I just can't wait for this baby to go to, you know, first grade. I can't wait for this baby to graduate. And I can't wait for this baby to get married. And I can't wait for this baby to have a baby because you know.

And like, where were you the whole time, just waiting for the next thing, right? And she says, just the same, you could be excited about the now, and be like, right now, I am so excited about this, you know? And it left, a really big impression on me As a teenager that I can choose, I could choose where I put my focus.

I could choose where I put my energy and I could choose to be present at any moment. Like you're saying, you know, enjoying your clothes. It's like, you'd think that's such a little thing, but it really adds to the experience. Right. Enjoying the people you're around, enjoying, you know, whatever you're doing, just being in the moment  is really very powerful.

So, yeah, thank you for sharing that. Were just going to wrap up and ask you where can people find you? Sure. So you can find me online at chanabana

com C H A N A B A N A  and also on Instagram Chanabana and You can call me.  If you're in the gush and Efrat, you're more than welcome to come and come to the studio. I have a whole bunch of beautiful designs here as well.  And that's where I am. That's really cool. Very cool. Yeah. I've checked out your website and it's actually really good.

So everybody go check out her website and give her some love. Cause she is really, really awesome doing amazing work. And I'm really grateful that you were able to come and be with us today on this podcast.  Thank you and thanks for having me and yeah, maybe keep on doing the great work that we're doing.  Yes. Thanks so much everyone for listening and don't forget to be connected for real. 

 And that's it! Thank you for listening to the very end. I would love if you can leave a review and subscribe to the podcast. Those are things that tell the algorithm this is a good podcast and make sure to suggest it to others. Wouldn't it be amazing if more people became more connected for real?  And now take a moment and think of someone who might benefit from this episode. 

Can you share it with them?  I am Robinson Bat chen Grossman from  connectedforreal. com. Thank you so much for listening and don't forget you can be connected for real.