#75 "Must Know Steps Parents Need to Support Neurodivergent Teens Entering High School?"

In this episode of Parenting Teens Advice Redefined, host Cheryl Pankurst dives deep into the essential steps parents can take to prepare their neurodivergent teens for the transition from grade 8 to grade 9. As this critical time approaches, Cheryl emphasizes the importance of understanding Individual Education Plans (IEPs), involving your teen in transition meetings, and establishing effective communication with high school staff.

Listeners will learn practical strategies to empower their teens, including familiarizing them with the new school environment, encouraging participation in extracurricular activities, and fostering open communication. This episode is packed with valuable insights to help parents navigate this significant transition with confidence and support their teens in building self-advocacy skills.

 #ParentingTeens #Neurodiversity #HighSchoolTransition #IEP #ParentSupport #TeenEmpowerment #ParentingAdvice #Education #SelfAdvocacy #ParentingTips

Cheryl
00:01 - 00:40
Hey everyone, welcome back to Parenting Teens Advice Redefined. I am your host, Cheryl Pankurs, and today we are diving into a topic that is critical for so many families, especially at this time of year. Today we are preparing your neurodivergent teen for the transition from grade 8 to grade 9. and it's typically around February, March. These meetings in grade eight are happening to transition into grade nine. This is a legal requirement, so make sure you are having this meeting. High school, I don't have to tell you, is a big step, and making sure that your teen is set up for success starts long before that first day in September.

Cheryl
00:40 - 01:15
The transition meeting in grade eight is one of the most important moments in this process. But let's talk about what you can do to ensure that your team is ready and confident and that you're ready and confident too. Your team, first of all, needs to know and understand their IEP. One of the most empowering things you can do for your child is to make sure they not only know they have an Individual Education Plan, IEP, but that they've actually read it and they understand what's in it. Sit down together. Go over the accommodations that have worked or haven't worked for them.

Cheryl
01:15 - 01:57
The accommodations like extra time, or breaks, or photocopied notes, noise cancelling headphones, or whatever applies to them. They will be able to tell you, yes, I use this all the time, or no, this wasn't something that I felt comfortable with. Praise them when they use these tools and reflect on how they made their learning experience better. In the comfort of home, talk about what didn't work and brainstorm new strategies that might be more effective for high school. This is a biggie. Bring your kid to the transition meeting. When I sat down in meetings from taking our grade eights into my grade nine classes, I absolutely refused to sit down at the meeting without the kid.

Cheryl
01:57 - 02:39
This is a game changer. If you haven't included your kids in an IEP meeting before, now would be the perfect time to start. Conversation is high school. It's time for you to learn way more about your own education and take some control. Transition meetings should be positive experiences. When your teen is in the room, they get to hear about their strengths and the areas where they need some support. Being involved removes any stigma or shame. These meetings shouldn't feel like something that happens to them or behind their back, but with them. Your teen is the star player on their education team, and attending these meetings helps build their self-advocacy skills.

Cheryl
02:39 - 03:13
Establishing communication with high school. It's essential to figure out what the best way is to stay in touch with the teachers and the support staff before the school year starts. Will you check in weekly or bi-weekly with emails, a phone call? This is something to establish ahead of time so that you're not scrambling if something goes off the rails or you haven't heard or they've missed a test and now you're scrambling trying to keep up and catch up. When will the teachers have access to the IEP? Sometimes there's delays in this. Sometimes there's a month of September to October where teachers don't actually have IEPs in their hands.

Cheryl
03:13 - 03:50
You can totally be proactive and send a copy of the IEP to the teachers ahead of time so they're aware and make sure your team knows who has it and what it says. And if you want to empower them even more, make sure they have their own copy. The more your teen is exposed to this information, the more confident they're going to feel about it. And multiple visits and familiarization of the school. One meeting and one school tour is not enough. Your teen needs as much exposure to their new environment as possible. especially with some of our diagnoses where transitions are really, really hard.

Cheryl
03:50 - 04:24
Anything new is a real difficult struggle. Request multiple visits to the high school so they can familiarize themselves with the space. Get the timetable ahead of time and walk them through the day as it will actually happen. Have a senior student or an EA walk with them through the school. the cafeteria, the lockers, the gym, the change room, and the student support area. They need to know who their go-to person is when they're in trouble. If they're lost, if they're getting picked on, if they're just having a bad day, they need to know their go-to person or their go-to safe space.

Cheryl
04:25 - 05:02
The more familiar these spaces are, the less anxiety they'll feel on the first day. We always want to encourage our kids to get involved in extracurricular activities or social supports, and high school isn't just about academics. It's also about finding a sense of belonging. Our kids who are neurodivergent may absolutely freeze at the thought of just hearing the announcement, if you want to join the basketball team, go to room 202, and they freeze. They would love to do that, but they are frozen. They have no idea what to do, and they're stuck. If you check the school websites in advance, explore the clubs, the sports, and the extracurricular activities.

Cheryl
05:02 - 05:39
Talk about what they might be interested in. Review the rules and the expectations ahead of time. Watch YouTube videos, clips about how these activities help them visualize what it actually looks like. Ask about senior students looking for volunteer hours. Maybe your team can have a buddy for the first few days or for however long it takes. Be proactive problem solving and open communication. No transition is perfect. There might be bumps along the way. The key is to be proactive and involve your team in the problem solving. If anything feels off track, reach out to teachers immediately.

Cheryl
05:40 - 06:21
Always include your team in these discussions, whether it's an email or a meeting or a phone call. This not only empowers them, but eliminates that he said, she said, the misunderstandings that can happen later when you get home. In closing, preparing your neurodivergent teen for high school isn't a one-time conversation. It is an ongoing process. And Lord knows you're probably just as nervous, if not more nervous than they are. So even going over all of these strategies will help you feel more comfortable. And then you'll be able to get a sense from them, what part is really making them uncomfortable and what part do you think they're okay with?

Cheryl
06:22 - 06:55
By giving them the knowledge and the tools and the confidence to navigate this transition, you are setting them up for success. Remember, this is their journey, and our role as parents is to support them, guide them, and help them build the skills they need to thrive. If you found this episode helpful, please share it with other parents who might need this information. If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. I'd love to hear from you. A big part of what I do is the voice in between. So there's that gap sometimes between the parents and the schools.

Cheryl
06:55 - 07:32
Sometimes parents are new to having assessments done and there's a new IEP and there's a 30-page assessment and you don't even know where to start. I can absolutely help you with that and bridge that gap so that you feel like you have a voice in the school and you feel like your kid has a voice in the school as well. Thank you for listening to Parenting Queen's Advice Redefined. Until next time, take care and keep showing up for your teens. Thank you for being here. Thank you for listening to another episode. I hope you loved this one as much as I did.

Cheryl
07:32 - 08:11
And I just wanted to share something with you because, you know, parenting teens is not just about managing these challenges that we talked about on all the episodes. It's also about evolving alongside them. And I'm Cheryl, and not only the host of this podcast, but I'm also the creator of Insight to Impact, coaching and consulting. And I help you moms of teens reconnect with your true selves so you can lead with purpose, you can parent with clarity, you can create stronger, more meaningful relationships with your kids. Because here's the truth. The transformation starts with you.

Cheryl
08:11 - 08:45
Together, we will break free from the stress and overwhelm. We will rediscover your power. We will create the life and the family dynamic you always dreamed of. If you're ready to start this journey, let's do it. You might just not recognize your life in the next 90 days. It all starts with a call. There's no pitch. There's no pressure, just a call to see if I can help. We'll talk about your goals. We'll talk about what's making you feel stuck and what might be getting in your way. And everything you need to connect with me is in the show notes.

Cheryl
08:45 - 08:58
Again, I'm Cheryl. Thank you so much for joining me here on Parenting Teens, advice redefined for today's complex world and the creator of Insight to Impact Coaching and Consulting. Have a great day.