WTCHH - Episode 3

Ashlee [00:00:04]:
Hey, everyone. Welcome back to when the call hits home. My name is Ashley Gethner. I'm a licensed clinical social worker.

Jennifer [00:00:10]:
I'm Jennifer Woosley, a licensed professional clinical counselor, and welcome. Yeah.

Ashlee [00:00:15]:
We are excited. So we have some exciting news today. It is our first guest interview. So we have Josh with us, and we're gonna kinda hand it over to him to just introduce himself for us a little bit before we dive into our questions and really get to know him.

Josh [00:00:30]:
Hi. My name is Josh Homuth. I am a son of paramedic firefighter ex paramedic firefighter. He's retired. And I also was a navy veteran too. So

Jennifer [00:00:45]:
Awesome. Well, thank you for sharing that, and thank you for your service.

Ashlee [00:00:50]:
Yeah.

Jennifer [00:00:51]:
So our first question we just wanted to get started and ask is what was it like growing up with a firefighter as a parent? So what was that experience like for you, Josh?

Josh [00:01:00]:
I I loved having a firefighter as a parent. I thought it was cool. I really looked up to him. He he was like a hero kinda. I always wanted to be around the firehouse, the fire trucks. Yeah. It's it's it was an experience for sure.

Jennifer [00:01:19]:
Oh, that's wonderful. Wonderful. So wonderful.

Josh [00:01:22]:
It was a family atmosphere very much.

Jennifer [00:01:25]:
Okay. I like that.

Ashlee [00:01:27]:
So they were welcoming at the firehouse then? They

Josh [00:01:29]:
Oh, for sure.

Ashlee [00:01:30]:
For sure. That is awesome. I love that. And I love that you said that he was your hero. I think, you know, for me, that's definitely something that I always say when I first start talking about my dad. I'm like, well, it's kinda cool. It's kind of my hero lived with me. So Oh, yeah.

Ashlee [00:01:45]:
I love that. How do you think your parents' job or your dad's job in this case influenced your childhood and kind of like your perspective on life now?

Josh [00:01:54]:
So he so my dad, like, he would always stress safety. And growing up, I was always stressing safety and stuff. And I felt I felt more at at a young age, more of a responsible person compared to other childhood friends that I've had in the neighborhood growing up. And I, actually, in fact, one of my best friends, his fire his dad was a cop, and they were good friends. And he he really influenced me to have a good work ethic, organize, try out any skill you can. I I mean, I looked up to him, and I always wanted to kinda follow in his footsteps.

Jennifer [00:02:49]:
That's wonderful. When did you feel like that safety piece? Like, when did you kinda notice? Like, I'm gonna pay attention to, like, smoke detectors or, you know, I'm gonna pay attention, the 4th July lighting fireworks. Yeah.

Josh [00:03:04]:
Well, 4th well, now that you say 4th July, that was a big big safety thing. I mean Oh,

Jennifer [00:03:09]:
of course.

Ashlee [00:03:10]:
Of course.

Josh [00:03:10]:
It was sparklers.

Jennifer [00:03:13]:
You have a smart

Ashlee [00:03:14]:
dad. Yeah.

Josh [00:03:15]:
But but the the funny part like, first time I really noticed it was my mom having candles in the house. Like, she wasn't even she said he's like, I I had so many fires with candles burning, people leaving them burning. And there was a huge red flag. I was like, oh, we can't even have candles. Even today, he's still stickler on that and see

Ashlee [00:03:43]:
if there's

Josh [00:03:43]:
any concern.

Jennifer [00:03:44]:
Especially when you make those kind of calls. Yeah.

Josh [00:03:46]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:03:47]:
What were some of the positive aspects? You know, I definitely think you've kinda mentioned that some, in terms of some things that your dad taught you and him being such an incredible hero for you. But what were some positive aspects of having a firefighting dad?

Josh [00:04:03]:
Positives, he he would always tell you what to do without telling you what to do.

Jennifer [00:04:10]:
Kinda Okay. Okay.

Josh [00:04:12]:
He he was just it felt like the rules and the safety concerns that he did have helped me in a positive way of being more safety cautious, not a risk factor. Yeah. The like I said before, the good the camaraderie of the firehouse. Mhmm. And, I mean, he had duties. Like, he had to cook. He had to get along with other people, and this is when he started at Elgin because the at hunt in Huntley, he didn't have it was a volunteer basis.

Jennifer [00:04:56]:
Okay.

Josh [00:04:57]:
And we grew started growing up here in the eighties nineties. And then he got full time in Elgin, and that's when it was 24 hours on, 48 hours off. So he had to stay at the firehouse

Ashlee [00:05:10]:
Gotcha.

Josh [00:05:10]:
With people that he didn't really know, and he had to learn to get along with them Mhmm. For the 24 hours in, like, cooking, cleaning, bathrooms, all that sort of thing.

Ashlee [00:05:24]:
Yeah. Yeah. I was gonna say I know that fire does have a really they are really particular. Right? Like, they are very clean. They have to do things in certain ways. Do you feel like that was a positive for you? Like, do you feel like you kind of got some of that from him?

Josh [00:05:38]:
Yeah. I mean, I couldn't leave the house without my bed made Oh, no. Garbages. You know? I didn't have to take it out every day, but, like, when it was full, it's, you know, take it out.

Jennifer [00:05:52]:
Can your dad throw down in the kitchen? Like, can he cook?

Josh [00:05:55]:
Yeah. Well, the you know, at the firehouse state, it was funny because when they grocery shop, you know, they would just be buying all these meats and then they grill out and and sides and stuff. So that, he he could do well. And breakfast too, he was a killer at breakfast. That's another memory that I actually took from him because that's what I my passion was doing the breakfast.

Ashlee [00:06:23]:
Okay. Nice. Oh, I love that. I was giggling a little bit because I'm like, my dad's gonna listen to this and be like, so my daughter did not pick up on those cleaning skills when she was a child.

Josh [00:06:34]:
You know?

Jennifer [00:06:36]:
I was gonna ask of that transition to make your bed in the navy pretty easily.

Josh [00:06:41]:
Yeah. And and that's that's where it was. Because right when I went to the navy, it was the same stuff.

Jennifer [00:06:47]:
You didn't have a huge culture shock?

Josh [00:06:49]:
No. It was you know, right away, I did my laundry. I didn't have to cook, but we did grow out and stuff with my buddies. Yeah. But, like, on the ship, I wasn't a cook, so I didn't cook. But everything else, I pretty much did. Yeah. It's it's Okay.

Josh [00:07:11]:
Strange.

Ashlee [00:07:11]:
What a great point. That was awesome, Jennifer, to that train you know, that was amazing. Such a good point there. Were there any, like, challenges or fears growing up with a firefighter as a parent for you?

Josh [00:07:23]:
Just fears of my dad not coming home or

Ashlee [00:07:27]:
Yeah.

Josh [00:07:28]:
You know, being hurt, being injured, you know, or, god forbid, dead from something. There was a lot of at the time in Elgin, you know, it there was a lot of gang activities Oh. Things like that Okay. That he would see too as a paramedic, and then he would also see the fires going in 10 story buildings.

Jennifer [00:07:57]:
What else over there? And

Ashlee [00:07:59]:
this is a little bit of a challenging question. So if you don't know it, totally okay. Do you remember that first time, like, around what age you were when you first had that, like, anxiety or fear, like, for your dad?

Josh [00:08:10]:
Probably when he's probably about 5th grade. 5th.

Jennifer [00:08:14]:
Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It's all fair. And that's definitely some different things to respond to. Like you said, a 10 story building or responding to somebody with paramedic needs. You know? Yeah. Yeah.

Josh [00:08:26]:
Yeah. And for challenges, just the unknown, I guess. You know? Mhmm. If he because sometimes he's 24 hours on, but then sometimes some somebody can't show or doesn't show, then then he does the double. And just the unknown of him in you know, when he first started, he was the bottom of the barrel, so he'd have to do nights Yeah. A lot. So we've crossed paths, and the thing that we had in common was basketball.

Ashlee [00:09:00]:
So Okay.

Josh [00:09:01]:
We would find time to do basketball, pick play pickup games, and things like that at a local park over here on Huntley. So

Jennifer [00:09:10]:
Yeah. That's wonderful. That kinda kinda leads us a little bit into our next question. You know, you were saying he has a 24 on, 40 off. And did you kinda you said he was in the volunteer fire department first. Is that when you were younger? Like, have you been alive through all his career? Okay. So it wasn't something like he

Ashlee [00:09:32]:
had been

Jennifer [00:09:32]:
a firefighter and then had you. And So

Josh [00:09:35]:
a little bit of background, he he worked, I don't know, like, 10 years or something for the cable company,

Ashlee [00:09:43]:
and then it switched.

Jennifer [00:09:45]:
So, like, a second career.

Josh [00:09:46]:
Yeah. Wow. So, like, when I was pretty much when they were when I was about 2, that's when he kinda switched careers.

Jennifer [00:09:57]:
So, Josh, you really grew up in the butterhouse then if you're 2 years old. Gotcha.

Josh [00:10:04]:
I I I mean, that's all I knew.

Jennifer [00:10:06]:
Yeah. Yeah. Well, so with that 24 on, 48 off, and then, like you said, people get sick or, you know, don't show up for work, and you gotta pull a double and all those kind of things. How did that impact, like, your schedule and the family's schedule? And and how did you guys work through that or maneuver through that scheduling, like, if he's on nights? And

Josh [00:10:31]:
So dinner would be hard. But but, you know, by that time, it was, like, high school well, middle school to high school, it was our dinners were just sporadic.

Jennifer [00:10:45]:
Okay.

Ashlee [00:10:45]:
There

Josh [00:10:45]:
were times, and we all had sports too. We were all

Jennifer [00:10:49]:
Oh, yeah. Sports family. Playing basketball, that's a full time job in high school too. Mhmm.

Josh [00:10:55]:
So it yeah. It just that's the main part of the or some of the challenges for growing up with a dad in the fire department was the, the dinners and just sometimes not coming home at in time.

Jennifer [00:11:14]:
Right. Like, oh, I think I'll get off at this time, but like you said, if there's a call or something like that Yeah.

Ashlee [00:11:20]:
That shift work is really hard, I think, for a lot of first responders.

Jennifer [00:11:24]:
Yeah. Especially, I think the families are impacted by that quite a bit. But, also, you know, when you start this at 2, it is kinda maybe a little bit of the expectation. Josh, I don't know. Like, did you feel like, oh, man. Where's data? Or was it just like, that's what it is?

Josh [00:11:41]:
Yeah. I was just it is what it is, and he's providing. And the main main part that I just thought about, he's out there saving people and helping people. So

Jennifer [00:11:54]:
Yeah. Absolutely. Pretty selfless perspective at a young age.

Josh [00:11:59]:
And he was fearless, and I forgot to mention that. He was a fearless dad, so he nothing really got to him, and he would just do it and and coach at the same time.

Jennifer [00:12:10]:
Oh, wow. So was he, I mean, you talked about enjoying basketball. Like, was he able to make games and things?

Josh [00:12:19]:
Oh, yeah. He he pretty much wouldn't miss a game. They have these days with they're called Kelly days, which is basically basically like a personal day he can take off. Okay. You get so many a year or so many a fiscal year.

Ashlee [00:12:35]:
Gotcha. That's nice to have.

Jennifer [00:12:37]:
Well, it sounds like you guys really prioritize basketball as a family.

Josh [00:12:42]:
Yeah. Basketball for me and my Okay. Few brothers would well, my other brother didn't really play in high school. Yeah. My littlest brother. But my middle brother, he he played football and basketball.

Ashlee [00:12:58]:
Okay. I think sports are such a great way to bond. So that's awesome that you had that with him and that you know, you you might still do, so that's amazing that you do. That's one thing that I know for myself as well. That was a way for me and my dad to connect. And I think that's just incredible that you, you know, that sports brings really brings people together.

Josh [00:13:16]:
And I think

Ashlee [00:13:17]:
Jennifer and I will talk a little bit later too about how that is such a a part of building resiliency and with your children. And so I really love the sports example. I have to give a shout out to that because I Well Jennifer knows me so well. She knows that's, like, my heart and soul. I'm like, yes. I love sports.

Jennifer [00:13:33]:
I mean, I think if you can make this a Bears podcast, she would, but I appreciate you, like, making this about first responders and kids.

Ashlee [00:13:42]:
Yeah. 1st responders could really do some damage, you guys. Because

Josh [00:13:48]:
the the sports and then I I do that with my own kids too because Wow. And and you build, that's how I kinda build rapport with other people too. Like, because I work at a school, so I talking about sports and my dad or what I went through helps me along with the others. So

Ashlee [00:14:09]:
It really breaks down barriers.

Josh [00:14:11]:
Yeah.

Ashlee [00:14:12]:
It really does. It's a great way to connect. So, you did already mention that you grew up in the fire station. So I think it's only appropriate for us to ask you. Do you have a funny story or maybe one of your best memories of hanging out with them there?

Josh [00:14:28]:
Like, I can't really think of a funny story just grilling out Yeah. And saying jokes and stuff and, you know, in a firehouse, it's dirty jokes usually.

Ashlee [00:14:40]:
No. It's just what I have to say.

Josh [00:14:42]:
So I had I've never heard that from

Jennifer [00:14:46]:
any first responders that are inappropriate ever. Like, that's not a thing.

Josh [00:14:51]:
Yeah. So and sometimes, like, if I brought girlfriends, to the fire station, I tend to get embarrassed. They they they embarrassed me. So

Jennifer [00:15:03]:
Sounds like a real family atmosphere. Yeah. Will you indulge me? I told Ashley this story earlier, and and, Josh, I literally just met you. And, Ashley, we will cut this if it's too bad.

Ashlee [00:15:17]:
We're not well, we're not cutting it.

Jennifer [00:15:18]:
Well, I wanna get

Ashlee [00:15:19]:
Josh, I

Jennifer [00:15:20]:
wanna get your thoughts on this story. So I told Ashley, I was like, I have a firefighter story. So a long time ago I don't know if you've ever heard of the police and fire games, if that was something they okay. Sports family, of course. Yeah. So, my dad participated in police and fire games. And so we were went to one of them in a different city, and we got to go see a firehouse. Like, local people have shown us the firehouse.

Jennifer [00:15:45]:
And in their gym was a poster of Backdraft, like, movie poster of Backdraft.

Josh [00:15:52]:
Yeah.

Jennifer [00:15:53]:
And another guy who's a firefighter commented and told this story. This is not my story. I heard this story. That when that movie came out and was released, there was a firefighter that would take possibly multiple girls to this movie and would take popcorn and put it in his eyes to appear that he was crying to get the attention of

Ashlee [00:16:20]:
the date to see the movie. But

Jennifer [00:16:24]:
that was my like, I thought that story was pretty funny and pretty smart fire guy. Like, just, you know, like

Josh [00:16:31]:
It's funny that that you say backdraft because that's the only r rated movie I could watch.

Jennifer [00:16:37]:
That's a funny story right there, Josh.

Ashlee [00:16:39]:
Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. That's amazing. That's

Jennifer [00:16:42]:
So your dad will approve that movie like he was

Josh [00:16:45]:
a fan? Okay. Yes. For sure. And Cindy Crawford was in it.

Jennifer [00:16:51]:
I'm sure there was some stories at the firehouse about that, but we'll keep it moving. We'll keep it moving. So I think you kind of have mentioned this already in some of the stuff that you've talked about with your dad and the work ethic and his commitment. And, you know, it sounds like some really great expectations that he had in the house. Like, you know, we take the trash out and make our beds. A lot of, like, wonderful responsibility for ourselves. But just kinda adding on to that as well, like, what values or lessons do you feel like you learned from, your dad's dedication to being a firefighter?

Josh [00:17:28]:
Just to always work hard. Don't don't take anything for granted. And you're always gonna have people you don't wanna work with, and you just choose to to handle it in a in a good way. And Mhmm. And, you know, don't just leave jobs, you know, after job because you don't need somebody. You gotta work through things.

Jennifer [00:17:57]:
You know, that's such a interesting dynamic that I just, again, please know I'm just so naive to about, you know, what's it like being a firefighter or, you know, growing up by a parent who is a firefighter. And I wouldn't even think about that. Like, the dynamics of somebody maybe you have to spend 24 hours, but it's not your favorite person. But what a great lesson in life. Right? Like, this is how you endure. Because sometimes I think we think, like, we only surround ourselves with people we like. And, I mean, I think that's great if we have that opportunity, but there's some real skill in navigating, you know, being with somebody that's maybe not our favorite and how to manage it and and, you know, not get an assault charge or something like that. So

Josh [00:18:42]:
And that's and that kinda trickled over to the navy as well because Okay. I I'm sleeping on a ship with

Jennifer [00:18:49]:
Yeah.

Josh [00:18:50]:
300 plus people.

Jennifer [00:18:51]:
Can't imagine.

Josh [00:18:52]:
Mine was a a small ship, and there was, like, over over 300 people. Wow. So it was like any of the people that didn't want to do laundry and stuff like that. And I was fortunate to know all these skills prior to going in on top of not working after high school and going in when I was 21.

Jennifer [00:19:15]:
So Wow. Yeah. So you didn't go in right at 18?

Josh [00:19:19]:
No. I I thought about it at first.

Ashlee [00:19:22]:
Mhmm.

Josh [00:19:22]:
Then I decided just to work, and then it just I felt myself going down a hole that I didn't wanna be in. So I went to navy and, you know, tried firefighting through them. Mhmm. And I it it was I met some awesome people. So

Jennifer [00:19:43]:
Yeah. That's wonderful. And I think it's incredible that you have the insight to say maybe, like, well, where I'm at, this path I'm on, it's not necessarily what I wanna be on. And I have some power and some choice, and let me yeah. Yeah. And I have to serve. That's awesome.

Ashlee [00:19:56]:
Well, I feel like this goes yeah. Absolutely. I I think that this goes right into our next question, which is awesome as well of just, you know, did your dad's job influence your career choices or, you know, gain your interest, which you kinda answered a little bit. But, yeah, if you wanna talk a little bit a little bit more about that and if it did influence your choices with all your careers.

Josh [00:20:19]:
It did. I I, you know, I went into the Navy without having a a technical job and just trying to strike out and trying to get firefighting. But when he got there, everybody really gets trained, But I went above and beyond, so I did advanced fire school and also doing maintenance on the ship. So I had that, and he influenced me. And my mom throughout the years saw that, you know, what my dad went through with the firehouse, and she kinda pushed me away from the fire department. Mhmm. So I show up as a, you know, son going on 2021. I was like, well, I'm gonna join the navy and do it.

Josh [00:21:10]:
And that that that didn't go good either, but just because I was putting myself in more harm's way.

Jennifer [00:21:18]:
Yeah. Right? Well, a a mom's response about protecting her kids probably a little bit different, isn't it?

Josh [00:21:25]:
But she found out that it shaped me into a better person.

Jennifer [00:21:30]:
Yeah.

Josh [00:21:31]:
So she

Jennifer [00:21:33]:
Well, so in terms of that, you know, kind of shaping in that experience and, obviously, again, your service to our country. But is there some ties between dad's service to the community as a firefighter and, again, parallels with your service in the service, in the navy, is there some connections there? I think you've kinda named a little bit of that, but I guess to maybe go a little bit deeper.

Josh [00:22:00]:
And this is why America, you know, you United States is so great is because we don't only help ourselves. We help everybody. So, like, just like the firemen and policemen, they they help everybody. And, you know, when we go over seas, we get orders. Like, I didn't go on land very much, but I was doing hacks. I was doing Wow. Helping different communities.

Jennifer [00:22:31]:
Yeah. Well and people in severe need. I mean, if the navy is responding to their need, that's a pretty extreme need. Yeah.

Josh [00:22:40]:
And people now that people that nowadays don't really understand why we do this, but it's because we're a great resource. We we're good. We're, like Mhmm. We're good at what we do. So

Jennifer [00:22:54]:
Right. Right. Yeah. And it sounds like, again, you know, since age 2, growing up in that service and kind of knowing that there's this kind of bigger calling sometimes to our life than just just serving ourselves. So I think that that's powerful. Especially, you know, you said this earlier, like, recognizing, man, it's a dad's not here, you know, for dinner, but also, like, that perspective of but I can recognize that dad's saving lives. I mean, I think that's a pretty big thing for a kid to acknowledge really young. I just wanna give you kinda some kudos to that.

Ashlee [00:23:31]:
That's really incredible. Yeah. Absolutely.

Josh [00:23:34]:
Absolutely.

Ashlee [00:23:35]:
Being a child of a firefighter has that sort of kind of prepared you for different challenges in your life. I mean, I feel like for you, you have done so much so much incredible things. So I don't know. You know? I think some of it may have, but also you're just extremely resilient and have done awesome stuff. But do you feel like there was anything that did kind of prepare you for those challenges that you have faced?

Josh [00:23:57]:
Just I mean, sports even helped. I mean, big big then, it was like I mean, I I when I say back then, I'm not talking. I feel like I'm 60 or something. But, no, it's, like, in the nineties when, you know, sports really prepared you, they really got on you really got on you to do incredible things. My dad with the firehouse, the work ethic helps me with today doing my own yard stuff or Mhmm. Construction because he does construction on the side because he's retired now. So he teaches me, like, that sort of thing. So, yeah, it's prepared me a a lot.

Josh [00:24:43]:
And and there is stuff on my bucket list, though. Yeah. I mean, I've done a lot, but there is and I travel traveled a lot. Yeah. Uh-huh. But there is places that I I still wanna go. Like, I haven't been to Europe or with the navy, and I'd love to do

Jennifer [00:25:04]:
Europe. Yeah. So Well, that's awesome. I think we should just lean in and make this the sports podcast. So, like, who's your team? Like, obviously, basketball nineties. I'm a Jordan shirt guy. Okay. Did you watch The Last Dance?

Josh [00:25:21]:
Yeah. I did watch The Last Dance.

Jennifer [00:25:24]:
Thoughts, feelings?

Josh [00:25:26]:
Oh, I liked I loved it.

Ashlee [00:25:28]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Josh [00:25:29]:
Yeah.

Ashlee [00:25:30]:
I mean, we are a Bulls fan, so it's safe to say we are a Bulls fan.

Josh [00:25:34]:
Bulls fans, Bears.

Jennifer [00:25:35]:
Yeah. Woof.

Josh [00:25:38]:
Blackhawk Blackhawks.

Ashlee [00:25:39]:
This is my guy right here.

Jennifer [00:25:41]:
I can't imagine because, I mean, I'm I'm originally from Louisville, and I can't imagine growing up because, I mean, Jordan's like a massive thing nationally. I can't imagine, like, that being in your backyard, like, you know, like, being that close to, the action.

Josh [00:26:02]:
Yeah. And, I mean, there's stories of me. I was go I was going to see Jordan in the late eighties.

Ashlee [00:26:12]:
Oh my god.

Josh [00:26:14]:
My dad's fireman friend had season tickets.

Ashlee [00:26:17]:
Oh.

Josh [00:26:17]:
So I would go at least 2 or 3 games a year.

Ashlee [00:26:22]:
Stop.

Josh [00:26:23]:
Yeah. And That's incredible. And my dad's other fireman friend had bear season tickets. Saying, you know So me, me, and Josh at our

Ashlee [00:26:31]:
next new podcast called the breakdown of Chicago sports because I feel like we could really make this happen. I mean, I sports because I feel like we could really make this happen. I mean, we're yes. Yeah. We can go back.

Josh [00:26:45]:
All my trips to Chicago, my parents love Chicago. That's another podcast I could even do.

Ashlee [00:26:51]:
I love this. No, I just I mean, thank you so much for sharing everything that you did today. It's been super helpful and I feel like I've learned a ton. And then as I'm sitting here, what I really love is that my brain is is just so much like, wow, this is very similar to being like a child, like because my dad was a police officer and Jennifer's was as well. So I see so many similarities and so many differences, though, too,

Jennifer [00:27:15]:
which is which is also just very cool.

Ashlee [00:27:17]:
And the whole reason why we wanted to do this podcast is because we're like, we want everyone you know, there's so many connections we can have, and then there's so many ways we can learn from each other. And

Josh [00:27:27]:
after your

Ashlee [00:27:27]:
story has been, I mean, super helpful.

Jennifer [00:27:30]:
Well, I think that, you know, kind of broad label of first responders, and yet it's broken into, you know, separate kind of buckets. And then within that, what are the families of people, you know, Leo, firefighters, like, that there's similar experiences, and then there's different experiences as well. Like, I mean, I you know, 24 hours, away from my dad, like, that wasn't a thing. You know? Like, he inevitably even if you work nights or days, like, we would see them in that day. And I definitely know, if there was somebody that he, didn't get along with, He wasn't trying to make them his beat partner. Like, he got some separation.

Ashlee [00:28:13]:
That's good.

Jennifer [00:28:14]:
For sure. So, like, again, that like, I mean, your dad probably had 2 families. You know? Like, the house the firehouse family and then the family of the kiddos. And so so

Josh [00:28:25]:
My best friend that lived across street, his dad was a cop, so he'd take me everywhere. He was a cop in Cary, so he would take me places. And I'd get the, you know, police invite.

Ashlee [00:28:40]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Josh [00:28:41]:
That was a neat environment, and they'd he'd take me to where the police bar and pub is. And so I had that. Where

Jennifer [00:28:50]:
there was probably more dirty jokes. Yes. No.

Ashlee [00:28:53]:
Not a barn ball. You are all not true. So true.

Jennifer [00:28:57]:
That's cool too that you have that

Ashlee [00:29:02]:
Well, Josh, is there anything else that you wanna share or anything that comes to mind? I don't you know, I that was our questions. We're just so thankful. And if there's anything else I do wanna

Josh [00:29:12]:
No. I I just appreciate you doing this and having me on. It's been great, and thanks for making me feel comfortable. I've I feel like I've known you guys.

Ashlee [00:29:24]:
Oh, good.

Josh [00:29:25]:
So it's, it's good thing that you're doing this. It's yeah. I I have nothing really more to add.

Jennifer [00:29:33]:
Well, we are just so thankful for your time. The most important valuable thing we have is our time, and so you giving us some of that this evening is wonderful. And, again, our first guest, and

Ashlee [00:29:43]:
Yeah.

Jennifer [00:29:43]:
We just appreciate your ability to answer these questions for us and just really enlighten us about your experience.

Ashlee [00:29:49]:
Yes. Absolutely. And then again, thank you for your service as well. I mean, jeez. We could not have had a better guest for

Jennifer [00:29:55]:
I agree.

Ashlee [00:29:56]:
I agree. What I feel.

Jennifer [00:29:58]:
Right. So we just wrapped with Josh. And was that just not so kind of him to give us some of his time and get to answer all her crazy questions.

Ashlee [00:30:09]:
I mean, talk about his willingness to be vulnerable with us and share his personal life. I think that was so amazing. Okay. I mean, he did a great job.

Jennifer [00:30:17]:
He did, and I really appreciate all he shared. You know, the last podcast we were talking about resiliency, and we just kinda wanna build on that. And I think Josh did a great job of talking about some of his experiences. And I think I think you named this first about the sports piece.

Ashlee [00:30:35]:
Yeah. So the sports piece really hit home for me in that interview. But also as a therapist, just thinking about resiliency in the way we we talk about how do we help our children build resiliency. And one of those big ways we can do that is connection. Mhmm. And so when he was like, I play basketball or we play basketball, you know, I I instantly thought, wow. That that's the same for me and my dad. I connect with my dad big time on sports even to this day.

Ashlee [00:31:01]:
And so I think that connection connection and then his encouragement to play as we were kids. I mean, man, I remember him being real tough on us during our softball days, but what did that teach me? It taught me not to give up. You know? Like, it taught me that even in in bad games to to keep You know? Like, it taught me that even in in bad games to to keep going and to keep trying and to practice and get better. And so building connection, whichever that may be, and I know we'll talk about this a little bit more first for somebody. I think it's super beneficial in building resiliency in your children.

Jennifer [00:31:32]:
Absolutely. And I probably should've Googled this research. I will say in, you know, training and resiliency, the research says that, you know, if a child has one connection with an adult that's consistent, believes in them, that they have something to connect to, that spills the child's resiliency. And I think we definitely get messages about, you know, kids are so resilient, and that is absolutely a 100% true. With that being said, it's still a skill and something that we really want to build and especially, as parents and with our kids. And I I think you're right that sports is a great place where that can happen and foster, and I played sports. It was a big connection. And I think Josh really mentioned this.

Jennifer [00:32:16]:
Like, there's a lot to be learned just about life in sports. You know? You win some, you lose some, all that. But I also think just whatever that connection is for your family. Like I said, we definitely played sports. And, yeah, I don't know if you guys you played softball. We played pickle in the backyard. You know, that was a big one in our family. But also too, like, we would go canoeing every or, you know, we kinda have those traditions as well that I think is a nice way to connect and, like, whatever that is.

Jennifer [00:32:49]:
And sometimes it's about what interests our kids too, and, like, that's something we get to learn. I hope that I didn't ask her permission to share this, but I don't think he'd mind too much. But my brother ended up playing lacrosse, and where we're from, like, lacrosse wasn't a thing when my brother started playing, which was, like, I think, like, in middle school, and he would have to, like he was the only team in town, and we would have to go to tournaments. And so, you know, that's a sport that he was interested in. My dad, my mom had no clue about lacrosse, but, like, I think encouraged that through him. So I think it's also could be really fun to maybe let your kids sometimes, like, show them the interest in building on that together too as a connector.

Ashlee [00:33:34]:
I think that's a great point. And it's and it doesn't have to be sports. Right? Like, we talked about how it can be any connection that that you have. Right? Maybe music, playing in nature in general. I think we both challenge our first responders who are parents right now to find that connection with your child, whether that be the child kinda guiding you to it or you knowing already some of the passions that you do share in common. And that is such a key way to building resiliency.

Jennifer [00:34:03]:
Yeah. Especially, again, in our kiddos, which I think is, you know, one of the most important things that we can do for our kids is to build something like that that would help them throughout their life. And, again, just to, again, thank Josh so much. But I think he really shared that about, you know, learning so early and how that helped him throughout his full career and life. And, I mean, I I know I talk about this with clients a lot that being a parent and being a kid is just really dress rehearsal for turning 18 and being an adult, and and it's all the practice. And as a parent, maybe I need to hear that myself today. Yeah. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:34:44]:
Yeah. That's very true.

Ashlee [00:34:46]:
So true. Well, again, thank you, Jennifer. I think, you know, this we're gonna keep building. We're just gonna keep building from here and continuing to drop a little bit of these helpful tools to help build resiliency within ourselves, within our children.

Jennifer [00:35:01]:
Yeah. And our families for sure. And thank you again for listening to when the call hits home.

Ashlee [00:35:07]:
Yeah. My favorite ending, right, is when the call hits home, Jennifer and I are gonna be here for you. So we'll catch you guys next episode. Thank you.

Jennifer [00:35:15]:
Thank you. Thank you, Josh.

Ashlee [00:35:17]:
Yes. Thank you, Josh. Bye.