When The Call Hits Home | Episode 13: A Deep Dive into Community, Technology, and Life as a First Responder’s Child

Jennifer [00:00:07]:
Hi. I'm Jennifer Woosley Sailor. I'm a licensed professional clinical counselor and the kid of a cop. And this is the podcast when the call hits home. Hey, everyone. It's Ashlee Gethner. I'm a licensed clinical social worker, and I'm also a child of a police officer.

Jennifer [00:00:23]:
Hi. Welcome back to when the call hits home. I'm Jennifer Woosley Sailor, licensed professional clinical counselor, and I'll actually be holding down the fort today by myself. My wonderful co host is off today, and she is very much missed. Ashlee, you're the best, but it's just me today. Excited to introduce our guest. It's Halloween, so this will be a little bit of a mystery guest with us today. And so I kinda wanna start by just saying how I met you.

Jennifer [00:00:51]:
Would that be okay if that's how we got started?

Mystery Guest [00:00:54]:
Yeah. It's been a long time.

Jennifer [00:00:56]:
So my parents had my grandmother come and stay with me when I was really little. I was just turned 3 and, living my best life because I was getting spoiled by my grandmother. And then I went and met my parents at the hospital, and they showed me this room with all these little babies, and supposedly one of those was you. And so that's the first time I met you. Do you remember this at all?

Mystery Guest [00:01:21]:
I don't remember. You don't

Jennifer [00:01:22]:
remember that at all. Okay. Well, I'm excited to have

Mystery Guest [00:01:25]:
said it runs your life, though, as a result.

Mystery Guest [00:01:26]:
I bet.

Jennifer [00:01:27]:
It's it's been trying. It's been trying for sure. But I definitely wanna protect your privacy, and so we're not gonna use names and stuff. But our, listeners will get to use some deductive reasoning.

Mystery Guest [00:01:38]:
Yeah. I guess so.

Jennifer [00:01:40]:
Skills. I know time is valuable. You got planes to catch and all that kind of stuff. So I just wanna kinda jump in and ask, was there ever an initial experience that you had that you realized your parent was a first responder? So kind of initial thing that said, hey. My parent does this for a living.

Mystery Guest [00:01:59]:
I don't think there was ever initial, with it. I think it was just always a part of it and identified with it. I mean, I think me and US kids always plan at the, police gym was a big thing. So it's just kinda you always kinda had that probably every because I think every social activity I remember as a kid, which she kinda don't see as much with things as was tied to that. Her FOP was, you know, the social hangout. Softball was all, you know Right. Props. Everything had that tie in.

Mystery Guest [00:02:33]:
So, I don't I don't know if there's just one thing I've hit, and it was just it was everything. It was all our life. And, like, I mean, Christmas, where we had the Christmas, I think, FOP had the Santa Claus thing and the video thing. So everything was tied to that. And, you know, I I think it's a it was a good thing that maybe in the larger size, see, you don't see anymore, and I think we're fortunate of that. I mean, every friend that, you know, outside of school was in a lot of ways, I guess, you know, family and stuff like that was was usually tied to that of some cop that he noticed, some unit, and then you just always go into, you know, the office. You know? It was always there, and then other people's kid there after after playing a police gym. So maybe, they needed to probably maybe better

Mystery Guest [00:03:13]:
health childcare centers. But Right.

Mystery Guest [00:03:17]:
There was always that element of running around.

Jennifer [00:03:20]:
So

Mystery Guest [00:03:21]:
where it could.

Jennifer [00:03:22]:
The FOP bar wasn't a place where children should be the whole time. Is that No.

Mystery Guest [00:03:27]:
There's a pool table.

Mystery Guest [00:03:28]:
I remember we played no. They wouldn't give you quarters

Jennifer [00:03:30]:
to each other. Actually playful. Could you imagine if we were given pool sticks? We'd be sharks.

Mystery Guest [00:03:37]:
Probably in the Olympics now. But, yeah, I remember just rolling the you'd be lucky if they'd let you roll the balls around it, but at the very least, she always had the, like, cue ball to throw from 1 end to the other. Mhmm. That was probably the height of the entertainment. So it was kinda like rights of pass. Not rights of passage for Saturday, but, like, you had a holiday party and Christmas party in the winter, and then you always had some like, the Turner's thing, like the big outdoor thing.

Jennifer [00:04:01]:
Right. The

Mystery Guest [00:04:01]:
snow is just kinda always yep.

Mystery Guest [00:04:04]:
And that was always a thing, and then you always had, I think for me, Martin, more than you, there's always I think you went to a couple, but I went to way more of, like, softball and, like, kind of, date more the big one, but there's always drama left. So there were kinda you took at these, like, community things with it. So I think you kinda missed a little bit of the actual, so that was just part of the community aspect, and then, yeah, always going by the office and stuff like that. And and then knowing that the schedule's kinda different from them compared to other people and, you know, other friends, you kinda realize that as well.

Jennifer [00:04:33]:
Yeah. I appreciate that.

Mystery Guest [00:04:35]:
And I

Jennifer [00:04:35]:
think bringing up that aspect of community, I didn't think about that. Like, I can remember Doug come in and, like, in his uniform at, like, career day at school. Did he ever do that?

Mystery Guest [00:04:45]:
You have that. Yeah. That's that's I mean, there was that I don't even remember. I just, like, pick up often.

Mystery Guest [00:04:50]:
Gotcha.

Mystery Guest [00:04:50]:
Because he was in I mean,

Mystery Guest [00:04:51]:
I guess, when we were really young,

Mystery Guest [00:04:54]:
I remember was the what's the was it what's the viewpoint there that used to have downtown? The Belle Belle East, like, work that beach?

Jennifer [00:05:01]:
The Bellevedere. Mhmm.

Mystery Guest [00:05:02]:
Bellevedere. That's what I thought, but

Mystery Guest [00:05:03]:
that didn't sound right. But, yeah, the Bellevedere, and he used to walk that. And I remember that was, like, probably the last time. I remember him as on the beat as much, but that was uniform. And then, yeah, he'd have different kind of things where and it was always kind of a special thing when he had that. It was had to be, like you know? And then he kinda went to plain coat clothes after that, so it's a little bit different. But, yeah, I mean, even, like, always you know, my dad talked to safety a little, which I I do appreciate, but, I mean, there was always a gun in between the you know, in the car when he was in his his undercover car, like, in between the feet. You knew it was always there out.

Mystery Guest [00:05:38]:
And I think, dad's credit, he was very, like, how to how to use it, be safe, and, like, not touch it.

Jennifer [00:05:44]:
Well, so do you remember that? Like, do you remember any, like, firearm safety kind of stuff?

Mystery Guest [00:05:49]:
I remember dad. I don't know

Mystery Guest [00:05:51]:
how old I was, but probably younger than I should have been, but I guess it's good in the long run. He, I think he showed me how to, like, clear it out in our, like, yard. I mean, I mean, not you know, I never built the ground and kinda showing how it kinda worked in there and, you know, that kinda and probably later on, we'd go, you know, to the family farm and actually shoot, like, a personal, but I think that was kind of a big thing. But even with the firearm piece, I think with that, I mean, this is kind of a tangent. But I remember our neighbors, like, I guess their son had passed away, and they, like, they brought over some, like, rusty. I told us somehow dad would know because of that. And I I think it also shows that neighbor of, like, police do kinda have all the hats, but and, you know, unfairly and probably not for the best of time that they wear so many hats. But, yeah, even that, like, your neighbor is

Mystery Guest [00:06:42]:
going like, oh, here's this.

Jennifer [00:06:43]:
Yeah. No. I don't remember that. Sorry. I do remember the neighbors reaching out with certain things.

Mystery Guest [00:06:50]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:06:50]:
Yeah. So that's a good point. I like that. What are maybe some unique experience that you had that were part of of your parents' job?

Mystery Guest [00:07:00]:
You I think the unique the biggest one that stands out is I don't think a lot of people realize, like, that. Obviously, there's good benefits and pay well. There's, like, you know, it's a decent, but I think the whole, like, what's off duty or, like, the off duty pay, and I'm totally blanking on what it's called. You know? But, like, that is its whole other side in Australia, especially for police. I I guess everyone kinda has it to a room. I think police has a security element. Again, like

Jennifer [00:07:26]:
The off duty

Mystery Guest [00:07:27]:
policing.

Mystery Guest [00:07:28]:
Off duty off duty in policing. That that makes sense. Like, that's a whole thing. And then, like, that is, like, a big thing that, you know, they have to do to kinda make money on the side, and and I think that's a big part of it. And it's, you know, put it again, but also less time you know, you have a stressful job, and you have to do this other thing to kinda make extra money, and that's, you know I mean, not to play with your family and all that, I'm sure as well. But you do it in a way to support your family. But, anyways, so the off duty piece, he always worked football games, and, you know, I'd always get to be on the sideline for games. I guess the biggest one since I was a kid when the, Navy Ram, like, picked me up or whatever that I always was, like, a big I think I had that for, like, years of kind of experience to get to play with a mascot of little kid, and I think that play stands out the most of, like

Mystery Guest [00:08:15]:
That's awesome.

Mystery Guest [00:08:16]:
Being the kid on the it's not like you always get it. You know? Like, you know, it's kinda funny even if your if your dad was a, you know, whatever, big rich, big guy, or color community. He can probably get you, you know, courtside or whatever, but that could get got me behind the, access, which I think was pretty cool at the time. Yeah. But then again, you know, everything you probably do it so much you don't appreciate. Right.

Mystery Guest [00:08:39]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:08:39]:
You know?

Jennifer [00:08:40]:
Right. Well, I appreciate that, and that is a great story and definitely a benefit sometimes is that off duty. But I like how you kinda incorporated it as well as saying, like, well, you know, there's a everything has a cost equation too. You know?

Mystery Guest [00:08:54]:
Yeah. I guess you don't think about it because it's such a part of the job that you don't, and now you're older. You're like, that was like a part time job.

Jennifer [00:09:02]:
And and

Mystery Guest [00:09:03]:
I don't think I mean, there's probably a lot to that from the individual as well as, like, you know, having to have a part time job. We all know even if it was whatever it was, like, that's gonna affect your other money, and now they consider it like that's gonna affect your relationships and just time because you only got so much of that. So especially when you're doing shift work into that. You know? Like, that has to be difficult. You know? And even when you're you know, when when dad was playing clothes and probably a little more investigative role, you gotta think that takes a that's a very important more mental job, but then you still have to do the classic policing job where people think of, like, security at a football game or concert or something like this.

Jennifer [00:09:45]:
So Right. Yeah.

Mystery Guest [00:09:46]:
I think that is a lot of things. We we don't always think about that, but it's just a part of it that's, like, kinda unwritten.

Jennifer [00:09:53]:
Yeah. Exactly. Well and to think about too, like, the executive functioning skills of managing all of that and as well as there's only so many hours in the day. And so, you know, where you might go to be, like, providing for your family, it also takes time away from your family. So it's a lot to manage

Mystery Guest [00:10:11]:
for sure. Exactly. And, you know, that's that's the vacation home for some people, and and they start and then some of them pay more than their other hourly, so you gotta see there's some conflict there as well. So

Mystery Guest [00:10:22]:
Oh, yeah.

Mystery Guest [00:10:22]:
But, yes, it's very taxing, but it's just part of it. And I don't know. I don't know if I have answered how to solve it.

Jennifer [00:10:28]:
Well, I I just appreciate your experience. I mean, that's what we're really here for is just to talk about those experiences for you.

Mystery Guest [00:10:35]:
Oh, I thought we're solving all the problems.

Jennifer [00:10:37]:
That's the next episode. That's the next episode. Are there any ways that you feel your childhood was different than your peers because you were a child of a first responder? So anything that kinda differentiated your experience in childhood?

Mystery Guest [00:10:52]:
I think there was the I mean, I think we talked about earlier just like you did have a little special access. And I guess also other parents would interact differently with how they thought.

Jennifer [00:11:05]:
Mhmm.

Mystery Guest [00:11:05]:
I mean,

Mystery Guest [00:11:06]:
obviously, some people have positive views of police and some have negative views. So that maybe that kinda picked up on, which I'm sure we can talk about that piece. But I I think just yeah. The shift, I guess, you know, we were kind of, like, you know, middle class, so not really there's many people that shift work then from our in a lot of things. That was kinda one thing.

Jennifer [00:11:25]:
Mhmm.

Mystery Guest [00:11:26]:
Also, like yeah. I guess this, now that comes to this is, I guess, also kind of a funny story is, like, when I was down in 4th or 5th grade that, like, it was near, I guess, downtown. So dad would, like, zip up there and, like, watch my play watch me, like, play playground. Uh-huh. And, like, my teachers thought he was, you know, like, like a a predator, possibly. So I had to, like, they had to realize that, you know, because he had an unmarked car too, you know. Like so I think there is that piece with everything.

Jennifer [00:11:56]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:11:57]:
Something that stands out of that that sort of kinda stands out. So he didn't have, like, your typical, like, day of everything where he could, like so he did have the ship work. We also I think he could fluidly be out and about because part of the work, I guess, is kinda being out and around. Right. But that kinda stands out of kinda like a different thing of, like I feel like dad was around and could zip around easier than maybe other parents who worked at an office job.

Jennifer [00:12:24]:
Like a 9 to 5, 8 o'clock in clockwork.

Mystery Guest [00:12:27]:
So we yeah. So we're the different. He also had some freedom too, I guess. So I think that kinda stands out. Okay. Compared to other parents.

Jennifer [00:12:34]:
Did you ever think that there was, like, you know, Ashlee and I have kinda talked a little bit about, like, expectations for us, like, the maybe expectations are a little different for us than maybe other kiddos?

Mystery Guest [00:12:47]:
Like, we wouldn't break any rules. I don't know if I put that all on the police data. I don't know.

Mystery Guest [00:12:53]:
I remember I'll tell this story. So I remember we had to write a persuasive piece for our family. Like it was an elementary school. And I think I wrote on, like, wanting a computer. Like, that was my persuasive piece of, like, why we should invest in a computer. And I had a friend that wrote her persuasive piece was why my parents should give me what I want. And I was thinking I mean, as a child thinking, that is not gonna fly in my house. It is not what you Yeah.

Mystery Guest [00:13:26]:
Well, I know.

Jennifer [00:13:26]:
Yeah. Some expectations of

Mystery Guest [00:13:29]:
Yeah. I mean, I guess I don't know if that all comes from the background or just kinda our parents kinda their perceptions of what important is.

Jennifer [00:13:38]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:13:38]:
But, yeah, I guess that is kind of how it is. But, I mean, that's why you say that. I didn't even know that because maybe if our parents did put into more of that, maybe, you know, we'd be Silicon Valley, magnets instead of since, you know,

Jennifer [00:13:53]:
you'd be play out the computer.

Mystery Guest [00:13:55]:
Yeah. Exactly. That was probably 20 years old, DOS, when Windows was in. That's kinda how the the trend was. But, yeah, I I don't think maybe there's element of that with it, but I don't know. I could attribute that to their Okay. Their backgrounds.

Jennifer [00:14:08]:
Alright. Was there anything about your experience that shaped your own path? And, obviously, you know, whatever you wanna share?

Mystery Guest [00:14:17]:
I think the public service piece is always kinda thing they went in that. Obviously, I think our dad's role in that was probably a bigger his role because and I I think I felt that later more, but I think there's always was a service element that kinda tied into there. And then I guess that's kinda all from dad's piece and then, like, all you know, I guess, dad's kind of lineage to a degree, I guess, mom as well, but I think that's kind of a big piece I get too. So yeah. So my own, like, service stuff, I think that's always kind of a thing that I've always kind of I think that I guess you'd have to say that's way further on dad's side from his service. So yeah. I think just public service, community service from I I don't think it has to be military as well as federal serve you know, Peace Corps and stuff like that.

Jennifer [00:15:07]:
So would you mind sharing a little bit about your service abroad?

Mystery Guest [00:15:12]:
Yeah. I was in the, I was in the Peace Corps a little after college, and then I while there, got back. And then I did the Marine Corps, and I've also done, like, National Guard for the army, and then just also working, you know, adjacent to federal stuff, in government service.

Jennifer [00:15:29]:
So can you tell a little bit about the transition from the Peace Corps into the Marine Corps until military service? Because I I like that story. So share that.

Mystery Guest [00:15:40]:
Okay. Living in the Cameroon for a little bit and, like, realizing that I it was a great experience. I got a lot of it. I felt I got a lot. Still got a lot out, but you do kind of wow. Is there, you know, Afghanistan was going on, everything like that. And it makes you appreciate both, you know, the things you have in America and just kind of even I I mean, to be honest with you, it would would go of, like, being from where we're from and, like, the family that you, you know, you do kinda because I mean, you do meet, like, a wide mix of America there as well.

Jennifer [00:16:11]:
Right. Not

Mystery Guest [00:16:11]:
not just in that past. And you you do kind of appreciate your parents and and the values they give you and stuff like that. And then you do, you know, you learn nurses there because obviously, like, there is a lot of, you know, poverty and problems there. But also, you you kinda realize that, like, they take community a lot more serious. And they do and, like, their relationships, you know, are very they have their own kinda way he deals with things. They actually do kinda take a community inside that we don't always do. But, yeah, just being over there, I I kinda realized that, like, do we do have a lot of things we take granted. So that was kinda my big push there of why I joined at the time.

Jennifer [00:16:47]:
Yeah. Well and I think it's a pretty isolating experience too, like, living in, you know, in another country and kind of, like, you're out by yourself. They don't put you with all Peace Corps volunteers. And in that time of reflection, you know, those are the things that you reflected on. I think that's a really beautiful thing.

Mystery Guest [00:17:06]:
Yeah. Yeah. You do have a lot of time to yourself. You do you know, there is the, like, this person's I mean, there's American. You know, there's even a person of, like, you know, like, English speaker. There was even so, like, you have these kinda weird, relationships. You kinda realize why you're overseas of that of just and then you realize, you know, if I was in America, I'd never talk to this person. Like, you know, you have this other kinda thing.

Mystery Guest [00:17:32]:
But, yeah, I think there was a lot of reflection and growing. And and kinda like I said, there was a professional growth, but there's also, like I said, personal growth as well as they were appreciated and came back with new perspectives. And and some of those perspectives that you thought were new were kind of tied you to the older things Mhmm. Of, like, you know, your your grandparents and, you know, things that you're happy that or your focus on and everything like that.

Jennifer [00:17:59]:
Yeah. You know, and Ashlee and I are doing this and kinda reflecting on our experiences. I can remember being in college and no matter what I was gonna grow up and do, and maybe I'm still figuring that out, what am I gonna be when I grow up. But it was always like it has to be something that matters. Like Yeah. You know, like, to your point, like, in in your way and in your line in service. And I think that there is something to when your parents are first responder, like, the perspective it gives you about what matters sometimes. But I also just wanna shout out, like, your incredible through line today just about community.

Jennifer [00:18:36]:
Like, I kinda had forgotten about those experiences growing up around community with FOP and, you know, LPOA and Christmas events and things like that. And then to talk about that, you know, living overseas and the community that was established there, I just finished this book, and Ashlee and I are gonna talk a little bit more about, you know, social media and things like that when it comes to, you know, parenting. And one of the themes in the book I just recently read was about community and the importance of, like, us coming together for a generation, and it not being so isolated and individualized with our kinda kids maybe lost in their phones.

Mystery Guest [00:19:20]:
I think I mean, I I think that is a big thing. I think COVID's blowing up. I think we do have, like, there probably is a loneliness crisis that we're not gonna even hit, but realize until it's past us. Other than some podcast, I mean, the guy was a political you know, consultant.

Jennifer [00:19:36]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:19:36]:
He kinda says, like, you know, people don't realize the loneliness. I'm just it's you know, there's people out there that like, a cashier, you know, asking them how my day, that might be the only time to hear it. I I think I don't know, that that might be a a topic for a different session. But there there is a piece of that, and I think, you know, you gotta find that in many ways. And I think, you know, that's in the military, I think in the military, probably, that's changed a little bit too. I know I thought I'd have a lot more playing Camaraderie. Camaraderie. And I and I did, but it's just wasn't the way I thought it.

Mystery Guest [00:20:08]:
I thought it'd be more. But there's but you do realize that it's out there. I mean, I'm I have really good friends from that and, you know, from training and everything that you you kinda get really close to people and, you know, obviously, combat, but, like, that obviously has a 2 as well, but just difficult training you get close. And just, you know, there are people that play basketball the more. And then over like, when I was overseas, know, we played just playing basketball a lot. You just kind of get along. You know, you do kinda have that that and I don't think a lot of people in a larger society even really get that more because you have sports. You play it all the time as a kid.

Mystery Guest [00:20:41]:
And then when you get after a certain age, you know, like, you kinda phase out that. And I think maybe there needs to be a push to kinda even have in our mural stuff, even more. So I think because I think there we are dealing with that. And I think COVID I think it was there before COVID, and I think technology

Mystery Guest [00:20:56]:
has Mhmm.

Mystery Guest [00:20:57]:
And it but I think that probably made it worse. And, yeah, I think technology, you know, technology is always gonna be coming. So we just we can't totally be scared and ludites about it, but we also need to kinda know how do we find the positive and and try to go go over the negative. And I think that's gonna be a big thing. Because, I mean, your technology too. Like, even what what we're doing, you know, like

Jennifer [00:21:17]:
Oh, right. This is possible.

Mystery Guest [00:21:19]:
If I had this process when I was overseas with the camera, it's how much I don't know. Probably. But then again, as I say, that experience would probably be completely different. Maybe I wouldn't have integrated as well if I was calling home every night for because I had good Wi Fi. So and then, you know, I I had, like, cell phone that people could call a little bit. It's expensive excuse me. Expensive as it was. But, yeah, I think back in the day, it was just letters if they were you can get there weeks at a time.

Jennifer [00:21:46]:
Right. Yeah. Well and I still have some of our letters from when you were in, Cameroon. So I appreciate that that's how, you know, we connected and stuff like that

Mystery Guest [00:21:56]:
for sure.

Mystery Guest [00:21:57]:
Exactly.

Jennifer [00:21:58]:
Yeah. And I appreciate it. I mean, technology is not going anywhere, but it's just kinda how do we use it with some gutter guards. Right? Like Yeah. How do we get it down the middle and get a strike, but not let it kinda

Mystery Guest [00:22:09]:
Yeah. We're talking about a balances of everything.

Jennifer [00:22:12]:
Yeah. Well, and as humans, we actually are kinda hurt animals. Like, it is good for us to get together in different ways. So

Mystery Guest [00:22:20]:
Yeah.

Jennifer [00:22:21]:
Alright. My last question, because, again, I know you're busy and important. What is a funny experience you had or just a story that you had that related to your parent being a first responder?

Mystery Guest [00:22:34]:
I I think I thought I hit it with the Ram. Funny experience.

Jennifer [00:22:38]:
Well, I have one. Were you in the car on this one? We were driving home, I'm sure, from the police gym because that's again where our childhood was.

Mystery Guest [00:22:47]:
Yeah.

Jennifer [00:22:48]:
And we were in dad again on Mark Carr, but his radio was in it. And it was like something like there was a knife height and it was one street over from Tyler from our street. And he's like, dad kinda gets serious and paying attention. It's like this nice fight. And so we're in the car. I'm in the car. He throws out on the sirens. We pull up, and it was like a kid 2 stories down, like, had fallen off their bicycle.

Jennifer [00:23:16]:
Clearly, there was, like, lost communication where all these police officers show up. And I remember somebody being like, what did you tell them? Because it was just a girl fell off her bike.

Mystery Guest [00:23:27]:
Was that a Swatting? The

Jennifer [00:23:28]:
original one

Mystery Guest [00:23:29]:
of the original Swatting incidents? Yes. I don't remember that. I think You are

Jennifer [00:23:32]:
I will. You probably

Mystery Guest [00:23:33]:
I don't remember that one. I mean, possibly. I think Yeah. Oh, that's the one positive. I going to the, like, the, side. It it it is there there are some perks when you get pulled over. I mean, I I never

Jennifer [00:23:45]:
I don't know what you're talking about.

Mystery Guest [00:23:46]:
I I pulled over one time, and, you know, Woosley's kid was always a good a good thing. So that was kind of a positive experience, to have that. I think even our mom used that, and I think her parents were divorced at the time. So she's still there. There is I don't know. Maybe that maybe they're we might get

Jennifer [00:24:03]:
a Ethan notices?

Mystery Guest [00:24:04]:
Yeah. That might get ethical notices from the car that that

Mystery Guest [00:24:07]:
we shouldn't shouldn't be put

Mystery Guest [00:24:09]:
in jail or have to pay a fine after all these years. But that's a that is a a hidden little perk there with, you know, if you're going 10 miles over, you you you do get pulled over. You usually usually, if you're you get a that but go bad to that being said, it's gonna come back to that person. Your your parents are gonna talk to her and so

Jennifer [00:24:27]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:24:28]:
Now you might not financially feel it as

Jennifer [00:24:30]:
much. Oh. Experience with that. It was just that call that was in our neighborhood, and again, it was just a miscommunication.

Mystery Guest [00:24:51]:
But Well, he responded once. I know. Go ahead. He responded once, but it wasn't that bad. But I know he always had that, like, bright glow band that had, like, police on it. Mhmm. Because like I said, an incident in the past was kind of a safety protection measure.

Jennifer [00:25:08]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:25:09]:
So I remember one time he did kinda run out and do that, and the rest weighed in the car the car running. And they but I I don't think it really I think he was kind of the he wasn't the first one there, and I think the more beat the beat cops took it. But Yeah. Yeah. I don't I think that's really the only thing I can kinda think of off the time I had. But, yeah, there was there was some small ones. But also funny too, you know, which kinda shows the line of, like, you know, they're always on duty, but, you know, like, you'd be in the unmarked car, and someone would speed I guess I guess that's it. Maybe we go to church, and some guy speeds by.

Mystery Guest [00:25:42]:
I mean, not not crazy, but he was going, you know, 15 over. Dad, and I was like, dad, you know, and he's like, I I think we'll I'll let someone else get that one. You know? Like Oh, you

Jennifer [00:25:51]:
were gonna go for them?

Mystery Guest [00:25:53]:
Yeah.

Mystery Guest [00:25:53]:
I was like, well, yeah. I thought that was, you know, you know, the the police are always having to serve, but, you know, he he said, let some other officer take that one because, you know, the paperwork would be kinda big. And, you know, he's a detective. That's not really his, you know, but, he

Jennifer [00:26:08]:
I always love that. I remember us laughing about, you know, feeling, like, super safe when we were little because we had dad as a cop, as a parent, and then realizing, like, when you'd sneak down to the downstairs and he'd just be passed out of sleep, we're like, oh, is he really gonna

Mystery Guest [00:26:26]:
Yeah. That I wonder yeah. I guess that that would be kinda interested for parents or people that didn't have 1st responder kids because there is that thought of, like, an extra level of protection. Yeah. You know, how much of that is just a dad and how much of that is there, like, a

Mystery Guest [00:26:39]:
police officer? But, yeah, that

Mystery Guest [00:26:41]:
that day, you gotta kinda realize that, well, maybe maybe I you know? Like, I remember maybe

Jennifer [00:26:46]:
the level of protection was

Mystery Guest [00:26:47]:
just under there.

Jennifer [00:26:48]:
I know. But, yeah, I think in that level of protection too, Ashlee and I have talked to someone about this. Like, I'll be honest. I didn't really have a lot of, like, fear around dad's safety. You know, I wasn't like, is he gonna come home or things

Mystery Guest [00:27:04]:
like that. I don't know. Because

Mystery Guest [00:27:06]:
I I mean I mean,

Mystery Guest [00:27:08]:
like, dad was obviously involved in a a pretty big event where it could happen. That was kinda before my time. I I don't know if if how you processed that, but that was kinda before older than I remember. But, yeah, I guess you don't don't really think of that because

Jennifer [00:27:22]:
I don't think of that.

Mystery Guest [00:27:23]:
You'd be

Mystery Guest [00:27:24]:
you'd be anxious all the time maybe, and maybe I just and I I don't think Dad wasn't and I think dad wasn't that anxious about it. Maybe, you know, at least at least perceive it. So, like, I don't know. I I never really picked up on that of that that happening.

Jennifer [00:27:38]:
I didn't either. And I don't know that every first responder kid I mean, pleased with fire. Like, I think we're kinda lucky. I think we might have been a little

Mystery Guest [00:27:47]:
Yeah.

Mystery Guest [00:27:48]:
Had a

Mystery Guest [00:27:48]:
little bit of

Jennifer [00:27:48]:
a bubble around us. I've been a little bit older, but

Mystery Guest [00:27:52]:
Maybe they want that too. And maybe that's good in a way too because Right. You wouldn't wanna be there. But yeah. Yeah. It's definitely a profession you don't think of. You know? Because obviously military, you know, it's it's funny too because, like, there's only a obviously, anyone, but, you know, they're statistically pretty low and and obviously certain specialties MOSs of that. But Mhmm.

Mystery Guest [00:28:14]:
It might be a little bit higher, but and it's, you know, it's just so large statistically. But, yeah, you don't you don't really consider the it'd be interesting to see what the statistics are. And there's probably even more statistics with that of when and where to I know, actually, I think a lot of from my understanding again, this is I don't know. But I think state troopers actually are pretty dangerous because of all the pullovers and

Jennifer [00:28:35]:
It's a very dangerous job.

Mystery Guest [00:28:36]:
Yeah. And

Mystery Guest [00:28:37]:
and, you know, just on top of while cars are coming 70 miles an hour and you're standing Right. You know, add the 2 that you don't really know that person. So there's, like, a a danger there when you where we consider maybe percepts usually, like, New York City cop or whatever has the most dangerous one. Really, it's it's fine. Not actually like that if you look at the statistics. So

Jennifer [00:28:56]:
Right.

Mystery Guest [00:28:57]:
It is kind of an interesting thought of it, though. But, yeah, I never really kinda had that

Jennifer [00:29:01]:
I didn't either. And I don't know that I've had the gratitude of that until, you know, now. Like, Dash and I kinda starting this, and then you and I talking a little bit more because I don't think that we were necessarily, like, naive or that our parents had us in a bubble by any means. But I definitely don't think that there was anxieties around, you know, safety and things like that. No. No. Or his personal safety.

Mystery Guest [00:29:25]:
No. It is. And and, like, it it I guess it it is a job, though a mix of a lot of things. It's there is a point where, you know, I guess even they treat it as a job, and you don't realize that. So you pick up on that. Yeah. Because imagine if they thought about that every day, you know, they probably wouldn't be able to be good at their job if you kinda walk every step and they're I mean, I think we've kinda seen that you don't want people like that because Yeah. Of all the incidents and issues.

Mystery Guest [00:29:53]:
You don't want people that aren't able to, like, be calm in a situation, and being anxious is not gonna make you calm in a situation.

Jennifer [00:30:00]:
So Yeah. I heard that. Well, those are all, like, the questions because, again, I know you're super busy. Is there anything else that you wanted to share with our when the call hits home listeners?

Mystery Guest [00:30:11]:
Really. I think interesting to you. I really don't think I've ever really thought about this stuff that much or or that, like, deeply because you know what you know, and that's Yeah. You know you know your experience, and that's kinda how you you get into it. You don't realize it. It's it's different. So Yeah. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:30:28]:
Well, I appreciate it. And I appreciate you taking some time to reflect. And, again, I know, you know, you got a plan to catch here. Important. And this is different for our podcast. You know, usually, people are asking to be on and promoting something, and we are not even telling people your name. So all I can really do is thank you for your time and for your service.

Mystery Guest [00:30:48]:
And maybe the 100th, a 100, 200 episode, we'll we'll leak that. That'll be a fan deep dish.

Jennifer [00:30:53]:
Oh, yeah. This is a

Mystery Guest [00:30:54]:
Easter egg.

Mystery Guest [00:30:55]:
Yeah. Exactly. That'll be the big reveal.

Jennifer [00:30:59]:
Yeah. Well, I hope to see you, at the family reunion. And, again, thank you for your time. And that just wraps another episode. Thank you again for listening and I missed I missed you, Ashlee, and you're so good at this tagline, but I'm gonna give it a try. Just remember, guys, when the call hits home, Ashlee and I are here for you. Thanks.