Episode 18: Juggling First Responder Life and Family

Jennifer [00:00:07]:
Hi. I'm Jennifer Woosley Sailor. I'm a licensed professional clinical counselor and the kid of a cop. And this is the podcast when the call hits home. Hey, everyone. It's Ashley Gethner. I'm a licensed clinical social worker, and I'm also a child of a police officer. Welcome back to When the Call Hits Home.

Jennifer [00:00:26]:
I'm Jennifer Weasley Sailor, and I think today might be a really special episode or a definitely a first for me. So I have a special guest to me. So why don't you just tell everybody who you are?

Jim Woosley [00:00:40]:
My name is, Jim Woosley, and I, over the years, had many titles. One of them was, police officer, but one of my proudest titles was a parent and father of Jennifer Woosley.

Jennifer [00:00:55]:
You're gonna get us emotional out of the gate. Okay. Well, so today's episode is with my dad, so I was jealous that Ashley got to interview her dad. And so, you know, we know you're like your son and very busy. Important. It's hard to nail you down to schedule something, but we get to meet today and talk a little bit about your experience as a first responder and your experience as a parent. And I guess I have you to thank for why this podcast exists. So if you weren't a first responder, this wouldn't, And it's, about ready to be Thanksgiving, so the the thankful season.

Jennifer [00:01:28]:
So thank you for that. My first question that you say I have the answer to, but I honestly don't, is what was your trajectory to become a first responder? How did you decide to do this for a living?

Jim Woosley [00:01:42]:
Well, I got, as a young man, I had no idea what I wanted to do. And, I got the opportunity to serve in the military in the early seventies. Vietnam was going on, and, I got drafted or ended up in Vietnam with no idea what I wanted to do with my career or life. I did have at the time, I didn't graduate it, but I did have a few years of college. And most people won't remember this, people younger, but, there was a author named Joseph Wamba who was a police sergeant with the LAPD. And he was a author and and wrote several books, and he had a TV series or 2. And as in Vietnam, I started reading some of his books, and I thought, you know, I'm about police work and being a police officer. And they, in his books, they seem to have a good time.

Jim Woosley [00:02:46]:
I thought it'd be a nice job. I might go and try to do that. So as a Vietnam, I thought that might be a career. And, I come back from Vietnam. I'm still in the army, and I got stationed at Fort Meade, Maryland. And I managed to talk my way in into the MPs there. MP was my primary m o MOS, but coming back to Vietnam, they gave me a little leeway. And, so my last year in the military, I worked as an MP officer at the Fort Meade, Maryland.

Jim Woosley [00:03:19]:
I got out of the the army, and I when I got out, I took places while I was in the army at Fort Meade. And I got out of the army. I didn't like my semester graduating. So I stayed up in Maryland and graduated from University of Maryland. But while I was out there, I I managed to apply and get a job with the Bladensburg, Maryland Police Department. So my first civilian job was the in law enforcement was the Bladensburg, Maryland Police Department, which is a small community about a mile or 2 out just north of Washington DC. Well, that's where I got my start.

Jennifer [00:03:56]:
In becoming a MP and your experience being an officer there, did you think that the book was true of the choir boys? Was that a pretty true story?

Jim Woosley [00:04:07]:
Well, I'm not sure about that, but coming on the local police department several years later, I'm almost telling stories because the statute of limitations might not be up. Right. But, we did have some good times, and and, I I did enjoy my my time as a police officer.

Jennifer [00:04:25]:
Well, I'll I'll jump into the mental health aspect because, you know, Ashley and I wanna well, we do that for a living. But I think back then, you would call that blowing off steam.

Jim Woosley [00:04:37]:
Well, go back to Joseph Wabenbach. He had a book called Choir Boys.

Jennifer [00:04:41]:
Yes. And

Jim Woosley [00:04:43]:
we had some choir practices. It Mhmm. That was the term that they used when they they were going to choir practice when they would get off work and go out and have a maybe alcohol beverage or 2 and tell some more stories and all. And and we were real good at that. We we did that on a semi regular basis.

Jennifer [00:05:03]:
Yeah. I think we might reframe and rebrand that into, like, reprocessing and maybe some time together to kinda talk about your shifts. Like, minus maybe some of the alcohol is probably a good use of your time after a shift.

Jim Woosley [00:05:18]:
Well, yes, I agree with you. It's, I don't suggest that you use the alcohol as maybe as we did as much, but the sessions were were stress relievers. They were we bonded. We felt each other's problems, the stories, and and we laughed over. We had good times. But, it it was a a stress reliever. I'm gonna jump ahead. But later, I worked overseas for several years as a police officer contractor for the for the UN.

Jim Woosley [00:05:51]:
And to do that, you had to go through a little training, and then we you had to do some PT, and you had to do several things. But one thing you had to do, you had to talk to a psychiatrist, and and and we talked. And I've talked to one one time, and I've done this several times. And he said, I know one thing was saying another. We got to talk about the military and, the PSD and the military being seemed like a lot worse. And he was talking that, in World War 2, people went to war. And when they came back, I'm sorry. PTSDS.

Jim Woosley [00:06:32]:
Sorry. But when they came back, they got on ships. And they all came back together, and it it took them 2 weeks, 3 weeks, a month, couple months maybe. But in that time, they did that kind of. They sit around. They talk. They told each other problems, and they told of the the stress they've been in. And they related to each other, and they were kind of self counseling, he said.

Jim Woosley [00:06:58]:
Starting with Vietnam. I was in Vietnam. I was there a year, and I got on a plane, and 12 hours later, I was home. So we didn't we didn't get to do that. And the the wars since then have not done that, and I don't know if it's, there's more PTSD today. We just know more about it. But, the World War 2 and early veterans, I'm sure they suffered it, but but they've countrated themselves, I believe.

Jennifer [00:07:28]:
Yeah. Well, I definitely think that there's something in camaraderie and being able to share and talk about your experience. And maybe the alcohol made the stories funnier when you met. You know? They made for better stories.

Jim Woosley [00:07:41]:
Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Just like alcohol time. Stories get better as we go on.

Jennifer [00:07:45]:
So how long were you a police officer before you became a parent?

Jim Woosley [00:07:50]:
It was 7 years. You ought to know this. You were there. But Yes. I was on 7 years. I made sergeant. And, I had a little ceremony in the district. And, you were there, and you were about 2 weeks old.

Jennifer [00:08:05]:
Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah.

Jim Woosley [00:08:07]:
So I'm sure you remember it well.

Jennifer [00:08:08]:
I do. I do. Did becoming a parent change anything about being I mean, it changes everything about your life. Let's not pretend that because I'm a parent. But in terms of any difference with your career once you became a parent?

Jim Woosley [00:08:23]:
Yeah. You you your priorities changed a little bit. The, choir practices didn't come as regular regular. And I

Jennifer [00:08:30]:
didn't get to go hang out

Jim Woosley [00:08:31]:
there. No. You had you had other responsibilities and you had other things to do. So it I don't know if, being a parent or maybe just mature and getting a little older, but but they went hand in hand. So, yeah, it changed your view and and and the way you your outlook on things.

Jennifer [00:08:48]:
Yeah. I don't know. My brother and I might say that you still went to those because we had quite a few times at the FOP lodge where we were waiting on you.

Jim Woosley [00:08:55]:
Well, you learn how to play pool.

Jennifer [00:08:58]:
Yeah. It's really good at pool. It's nice to those choir practices for sure. Anything else that you wanted to say in regards to that?

Jim Woosley [00:09:06]:
No. No. I don't think so.

Jennifer [00:09:08]:
So, obviously, the priorities change when you become a parent. Was there anything in your experience that you think was maybe made you a different parent because of what you did for a living?

Jim Woosley [00:09:21]:
Yeah. As a police officer or firefighter EMS when you're making making calls, calls for service. And, one of the calls that always bothered me, and I'm sure it bothers all of us, is, Sid's death. So that affects how you look on you on your family and and your kids and all you're always worried about. And that's something that there's nothing to do about it. I mean, you go to bed and that happens. But, that was always a a call that I hated, and it it just didn't seem right.

Jennifer [00:09:57]:
Well, it doesn't. You know, mom tells my mom tells a story. I think I was a newborn, and she had put me in my crib and just having what we would call now postpartum. I think she called it baby blue since how old I am. But she became a little emotional and started weeping and said she heard you run up the stairs and run into the nursery and immediately check me to see if I was breathing before, and it it startled her. Like, wait. What are you doing? But when you make a call like that, I'm sure it's you know, watching your baby breathe is something that you kinda become super aware of. Well, I'll tell the story about you as a parent being a first responder.

Jennifer [00:10:41]:
Well, before I do that, tell us not your whole CV resume, but give us just a little bit. So 7 years in, you became a sergeant, and then tell us a little bit more about what you did in your career and save your your second career a little bit for the end, your overseas work.

Jim Woosley [00:10:59]:
Okay. I I was 7 years old. I had 7 years old when I made sergeant. Those first seven, I I did like most officers do. I spent the first four or so in patrol riding the beat. And I was a district detective for a little while. Then I made sergeant and and moved. I was a district sergeant for about 6 months.

Jim Woosley [00:11:22]:
It's just kind of a policy that we put new sergeants in the radio room. And I went to the 2nd district, which was downtown area. And, primarily down there, most of my time, I I hit the walking beach, which was a a business area in downtown Louisville. And then the 4th and 5th battoons, which was extra battoons. I was there for about 10 years, I guess. And, made sergeant, and I was I was a sergeant then. I went to homicide. I spent 5 years as a homicide sergeant, and I went to robbery.

Jim Woosley [00:11:58]:
I spent 5 years in robbery, which, which time I really enjoyed robbery time. And then after that, I was fortunate enough to make lieutenant. And as a lieutenant for a few years before I retired.

Jennifer [00:12:13]:
Tell me why you like robbery so much. I remember why you told me this

Jim Woosley [00:12:17]:
for a moment. In robbery, it was, basically, who done it, and we're all bad guys. I used to joke that in homicide, there were some, some people deserve to get killed, but nobody deserved to be robbed. You know? So and, there was no domestic killers. They were all kinda who done it. And, and I really enjoyed robbery. You're really looking for bad guys.

Jennifer [00:12:45]:
Well, I'm glad you took us to robbery because that's what I wanted to talk about. So I was probably in high school middle school, high school, and, we were up there probably at the police gym because that's where we spent all FOP or police gym. That's where my childhood was. But I think we were leaving, and somebody was being held, like, getting ready to be interrogated. And the person was a professional or former professional athlete, I think a football player. Do you remember this?

Jim Woosley [00:13:18]:
Maybe.

Jennifer [00:13:19]:
So he was a professional athlete, and he was being interrogated and charged with a robbery. And and maybe there were some concerns about there had been a homicide that he might know some details about. And you told my brother and I, that's what drugs will do to you. You know, he was on top of the world, a professional athlete. Can you imagine, you know, getting to do something you love like that? And here he was in a, you know, in a police headquarters getting ready to be interviewed. And I I mean, I do think that, you know, in terms of the power of what drugs will make you give up. So that was a good lesson as a first responder parent.

Jim Woosley [00:13:59]:
I remember that, and I I think you're exaggerating a little. He I believe it was professional athlete. I think it was a University of Louisville football player. In in Louisville, that is a professional athlete. They we don't get no better than that. But he was a he was a UF football player, and, he would have a, drafted by Atlanta, the Falcons.

Jennifer [00:14:21]:
There we go. So I think

Jim Woosley [00:14:22]:
he wasn't all higher. But he was he was a really nice guy, and he was begging to be called. He he robbed the place, and they called a taxicab to take him home. So being the good the text we were, we're able to figure that out, and we got him. And he he was wanting to get caught, and he then he said that, that, first time he did drugs, he knew it was a drug of choice. And he was he was addicted after one time a year, and then it was a it was a good lesson for young kids, I think.

Jennifer [00:14:59]:
Yeah. That's so sad.

Jim Woosley [00:15:00]:
Yes. It was. He he was it was sad.

Jennifer [00:15:04]:
Yeah. Talk to us a little bit about your your second career. We're gonna jump around a little bit.

Jim Woosley [00:15:11]:
I was lucky that I had a a good second career. I retired after 30 years with the I retired from Louisville Metro Police. I spent majority of that time with the old Louisville City Police. But on retirement, I went to work as a contractor for the it was a contractor through the state department, but, basically, he's a policeman for the UN. And I got to go to, I did that for about almost 10 years, I guess. But that 10 years, I'd worked maybe 7 6 or 7 years. You'd work a year and a half and take off a year and go back. But I was able to go to a library in West Africa first, which, which is really a a learning experience.

Jim Woosley [00:15:57]:
Talk about poor people and not having anything. This time of Thanksgiving, we really should be thankful. They had very little, and they were were happy with what they had. They were

Jennifer [00:16:07]:
Very grateful.

Jim Woosley [00:16:08]:
Very grateful. Very grateful. And then, and I also went to Kosovo in, in in Europe. I did that twice, and then I ended up in Jordan in the Middle East, ended up going there twice, training and teaching the Palestinian police who'd come over from from Israel or or, Gaza. And, we train them over there for 3 or 4 months, and they'd go back.

Jennifer [00:16:40]:
So I definitely was the benefactory of you living overseas, so I got to see quite a bit of things. Thanks for that.

Jim Woosley [00:16:46]:
We did, we, one thing that the police department did for us, we, we got to do a lot of traveling. And I said we as a family, it seemed like all of our family vacations were were based around the police department. Where they went to FOP conventions as involved in the FOP, and we have a convention every 2 years. And they were family friendly, so we went to oh, you went to Orlando and Phoenix and Oklahoma and other places. So, our vacations were pretty much police related.

Jennifer [00:17:28]:
Well, I remember FOP convention in Louisville, Kentucky, and, we still got to stay at the Hyatt, so we were big time, you know, to be in our own backyard and get to stay at the fancy hotel. No. I mean, I think all our vacations are around that, which, again, I think is talking more about the community or the brotherhood. Just we had this conversation before, but I think it's a good thing to bring up to the podcast. You know, you retired after how many years?

Jim Woosley [00:17:58]:
That's 30:30 on the

Jennifer [00:18:00]:
30 years. And then you retired and, I don't know, 2 weeks later went to Liberia?

Jim Woosley [00:18:09]:
Actually, I was supposed to leave before I retired. I came back at Tabartos, so I won't bore you that story. But, actually, I I took a vacation to leave and, give a a friend of mine, another a a sergeant, power of attorney, so he'd retire for me. But we, while I was training, some things changed, and I hate to cut I got come back a time or 2. I ended up retiring and and, turning my gun and badge and everything in. And I came back the 3rd time, and I was supposed to stay another couple of weeks to take a vacation. I went back to work. I went down to the property room and got a badge, and I also worked another 2 weeks.

Jim Woosley [00:18:51]:
So, actually, I worked up to the day I left.

Jennifer [00:18:56]:
Well and, you know, sadly, there's a lot about suicide rates increase for first responders after retirement. Talk a little bit about, you know, maybe what your experience was different for you.

Jim Woosley [00:19:08]:
Well, I was lucky there because I fell into another job, another career, and, and I really enjoyed. I mean, I really enjoyed. I got to go a lot of places. Some of them most of them weren't very nice. I mean, they were places that were at war or had been at war, and the the political situation was good. There was a lot of unrest. But I got to work with a lot of the police from all over the world, and, I mean, all over the world. And I got to work with some really good ones.

Jim Woosley [00:19:40]:
And like everywhere else, a few that wasn't good, but but but I really enjoy bonding and working and seeing different lifestyles and different ways of doing things from police from Europe, China, Philippines, Africa. Just everywhere you can imagine. Made a lot of good friends, and and I fortunately, I got the several of them. I've gone to their home and and countries all over the world. And and I had some visit me here, and I still got communicate with friends and all.

Jennifer [00:20:16]:
Those lucky ones that got to come to Kentucky.

Jim Woosley [00:20:19]:
Yeah. Yeah. They they all of them had some German and some Chinese, and I think all of them really enjoyed it.

Jennifer [00:20:26]:
Tell the story about being on Liberia and doing the census and, finding out some people's some local names.

Jim Woosley [00:20:34]:
You remember that story? No. I don't remember that.

Jennifer [00:20:36]:
I'll use the punch line if I I can tell you that. We have to come back to that one. But, I mean, I think it's hard to retire and not have anything to do.

Jim Woosley [00:20:45]:
Well, I actually it wasn't an issue for me because I feel got out got out and jumped right back in the deep end.

Jennifer [00:20:54]:
What recommendations would you give for people retiring them?

Jim Woosley [00:20:58]:
To to have a plan. And it it doesn't have to go back to work full time, but have a, an interest, a hobby, a a job, a a plan to to keep you active and keep you busy and keep you social. Don't just go sit in your room and become a hermit because that I think it causes some people problems. They don't we are social animals, and we need to be with

Jennifer [00:21:23]:
We are herd animals. That's for sure. That's for sure. And, actually, I think that's Ashley and I's goal a little bit here at the podcast. It's just saying, hey. There's a community. So talk a little bit more about parenting. Do you feel like that there was any impact of what you did for a living in your family?

Jim Woosley [00:21:42]:
I don't think, being a police officer affected our family that much. And when I say that, I mean things like, holidays. You gotta work on holidays. But I don't think, and you may correct me on this, but the family suffered much because of that. We, most Christmases, I was there. And the only the one thing I did miss, and I don't think you missed much for but for about 5 years when I was in talking about it in the 2nd district downtown area, they had a hot they had a light up Louisville on Friday after Thanksgiving, but you all would go to the your grandparents' home, which is about 80 miles away. And I can never go to that because I always had to work on a Friday. But, that wasn't a big sacrifice, I don't think.

Jim Woosley [00:22:36]:
We

Jennifer [00:22:37]:
That was one thing I don't think that I'm like, that you weren't present in terms of holidays and things like that. I didn't really remember you not being there. I remember one basketball game you didn't come to, and I called you from a pay phone to tell you about it. It's a county school I went to, and you needed to know all the details. That's about the only ball game you ever missed.

Jim Woosley [00:23:00]:
Yeah. Don't hope some of my old bosses don't hear this because I might have been some places that shouldn't have been sometime in a ballgame or

Jennifer [00:23:09]:
a But in uniform.

Jim Woosley [00:23:10]:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:23:12]:
Making sure everybody was safe. Uh-huh. So you said that you didn't think there was much impact being a first responder

Jim Woosley [00:23:20]:
on the family? Well, I mean, you said a lot of stuff we did was around the police department, around the FOP.

Jennifer [00:23:28]:
Mhmm. A

Jim Woosley [00:23:29]:
lot of friends were in the same similar situation. But you all had your school friends, and you had your neighborhood friends. So you just didn't go around up around just first responders kids. You had the had your other friends.

Jennifer [00:23:47]:
Well, what about for you? That was actually my question where I couldn't think of it. So, you know, you mentioned that in terms of having a hobby. And so what was your hobby? What was your kind of social life outside of first responding?

Jim Woosley [00:24:01]:
Well, I'm a I've become a pretty big. I got into running at at, for physical fitness on the police department. I I did a little training for the police in that area. But that was kinda my hobby and all, and I got to officiate it. I'm still officiating track and field. Still enjoyed it, and and I still do quite a little bit of that. But, that's another thing we did. Seemed like every 2 years, they have this world play some fire games.

Jim Woosley [00:24:33]:
But I started doing that in the early nineties and and enjoyed it. And I'd every 2 years would come up, and and I'd worked pretty hard for it. And we got some good trips out of that.

Jennifer [00:24:44]:
I've seen Stockholm, Sweden because you went to the world

Jim Woosley [00:24:49]:
We the

Jennifer [00:24:49]:
PlayStation's fire games.

Jim Woosley [00:24:51]:
It was every 2 years, and it seems like you and your brother would fight and argue who'd sit get to go. And, you got the good year. You went to Stockholm, and I think got to go to Vancouver. You both looked out pretty good when we went to Barcelona.

Jennifer [00:25:05]:
You're good at Barcelona.

Jim Woosley [00:25:06]:
And then after Barcelona, it was in Indianapolis. And I think I had to make both of you go. Neither one of you wanna go to Indianapolis. I think

Jennifer [00:25:13]:
it's a fair time or 2.

Jim Woosley [00:25:14]:
A 100 miles away.

Jennifer [00:25:15]:
Well, we're probably traumatized from all the IU, track meets you made us work as children. So yeah. But, no, the you know, all kidding aside, but I think you definitely had your outlet in running and sports, which is a pretty healthy outlet to have outside of being a first responder.

Jim Woosley [00:25:35]:
Yeah. I think so. I feel like it. I I feel like it helped me get through some situations and something I still enjoy.

Jennifer [00:25:43]:
So, you know, the question comes back to, do you feel like it impacted your family? And so I appreciate you can name some positive impacts in terms of getting to go to FOP trips and conventions and then, you know, world track and field games, and those were beneficials and some important lessons in life of saying, hey. You know, choices you make impact your whole life. Those are all positives. Is there anything that you feel like was any kind of negative impact?

Jim Woosley [00:26:16]:
I remember one incident, and it it may not impacted you and your brother as much as it did your mother. But I was I was in homicide at the time. It's about Christmas time. We found a body of a newborn in the area around the mall. Well, it was a, you know, it was it was an unknown, a Jane nobody. So we were trying to figure out, first of all, who it was, who the mother was. And we got some tips and all. We got a tip on this one, and we go interview her and bring her in and talk to her.

Jim Woosley [00:26:59]:
She finally says, yeah. She it wasn't hers, but she'd had a baby. And she buried it in her backyard. So we go out and and dig up the yard and and find it. About that time, the the local news media is doing a story on on us and homicide, and they're reviewing me. And this one probably the smartest thing I ever did, but they asked me something about problems at home and and or problems with, work. And I said, my wife, talked she was a a store manager. She managed a pretty good department department store.

Jim Woosley [00:27:43]:
And I said, when you're digging up dead babies, you're not really too concerned about what your spouse's work problems are. And that was probably not a good thing to say, and, I I feel bad, and that could be why I'm divorced today. That's that's not the reason, but it it it it it it it might've helped.

Jennifer [00:28:03]:
I think that's impactful to say that, to say, you know, it definitely gives perspective about other people's experiences and trying to walk through that because I've said this before. You know, I I work with some people, and we're talking about life or death with clients and other people. They're talking about their inbox. Their email index is really full. And And, you know, that can be hard to, like, oh my goodness. That's not a big deal. And yet that is their reality. That is a stressful thing to have a really full inbox.

Jennifer [00:28:37]:
So how do you maneuver through that?

Jim Woosley [00:28:39]:
Well, like, when people call the police or the fire or any first responder, it's it's probably the biggest thing in their life. And when you get there and it's a routine and it's a run or call you make 3 times that day, it's not that big a deal to you. But to them, it's, it's huge. So you just you got to work with them and and understand that their priorities and yours are not the same, but it's it's important to them, and you need to take care of their issues.

Jennifer [00:29:12]:
Yeah. Yeah. Well, I I do think that that's hard. I mean, do you ever think that well, to share my experience, I do think sometimes she came home pretty irritable. But if he saw 2 dead babies in a day, I imagine that. So but how do families maneuver through that? Because as a kid, I don't know that. And I don't know that I should know that as a kid.

Jim Woosley [00:29:38]:
No. You shouldn't. And and we as parents should be more understanding probably. It's it's our responsibility and not the kid's responsibility. We need to be more sympathetic and and leave your problems at the door, which sounds good, but that's hard to do.

Jennifer [00:29:55]:
It is really hard to do. And I think, you know, just circle back to you sitting in Vietnam and reading this book about the Choir Boys and which reference for people that are listening. The Choir Boys is a book. They say they're going to choir practice, but they're going to a parking lot and drinking beer. That's the premise of the book. No spoilers for the book that was, you know, written in the seventies. But I think you're coming back to, let's look at the benefits in those things. Like, there are some positives in that to come together, to have a place to say I'm not alone and that it's been a hard day or that was really crummy.

Jennifer [00:30:32]:
Right?

Jim Woosley [00:30:33]:
Yeah. Exactly.

Jennifer [00:30:34]:
And then, I mean, I I I think moving our bodies is important. I think your exercise was a place that was healthy for you to kind of, you know, move some of that stuff for a long in our body. So I think that there's positives in that, and I appreciate you taking that responsibility to say as parents, it is our job. And, man, that can be really hard when you have a really stressful job. And I think it requires a lot of front loading. We kinda talked about that in an episode we just recorded, how important it is. And this is you are not a firefighter, but I know what to do if this house catches on fire. And that's not because I have a firefighter because you're not a firefighter, and I've never been in a building that's ever caught fire before.

Jennifer [00:31:19]:
However, we do fire drills when there's no fire. So I think whatever we can do in positive ways to really front load healthy things like a healthy hobby, something that we enjoy as a family together. You know, I I have a 5 year old. The reason that, he used to like me is because I gave you a grandson, and we've done some game night. And it reminds me, I mean, we played games when we were kids. Remember that? We would have a game night. So I think that there were things that you guys did to kind of, you know, give us a connection as parents.

Jim Woosley [00:31:56]:
Well, I hope so. I think one thing I'm proud of you and and your brother both are still active physically and work out and run, and and, that's part of his routine in life. And he's north military, which I guess he still has to, but but, I'm proud of that influencer I left on you.

Jennifer [00:32:18]:
Well, I think it's important to think of yourself. You know, we're not just our brains. We're not just our body. I mean, it's the whole seeing ourselves holistically. You know, mind, body, spirit is important. So I think having those. Yeah. It's my last official question.

Jennifer [00:32:36]:
You've done a great job. I haven't put you on the spot too much of it. What parenting wisdom would you pass on to a parent who happens to be a first responder? Oh,

Jim Woosley [00:32:49]:
sometimes we and I think more so than most, but you say every job. Sometimes they we put a job before anything else. So maybe we ought to step back a little bit. Maybe, our family ought to have a little higher priority and and give it a little a little higher place. Like I said, I I I tried to do that, and maybe I did it. Sometime, that's expensive. The police department is I might have come to some of your ball games

Jennifer [00:33:17]:
working. So there's some bad guys on the streets because you came to my ball game.

Jim Woosley [00:33:21]:
I tried to make every every ball game, but you or your brother either one had.

Jennifer [00:33:27]:
Well, let me tell you this because I think that's a beautiful point. And, I'll tell you a personal story. You tell me if you can relate at all. So I, you know, became a mom, and I took my maternity leave. And I went back to work, and I was kind of looking forward to going back to work. And I, of course, it was hard to have our son, and and he was the best thing ever. But I was like, you know, looking forward to going back to work, and then I was enjoying being back at work. And I reflected a little bit, and I'm like, man, I really am happy to be back at work.

Jennifer [00:34:03]:
And it hit me because you've been a police officer for 7 years. I've been a therapist for several years before becoming a mom. I was I knew what to do as a therapist. I was like, I got this. I've been doing this long enough. I know where to file the papers. I know where to make the copies. I know how to sit and be present for people.

Jennifer [00:34:25]:
I don't know anything about being a parent, and it it really kinda hit me like, oh, it's kinda hard sometimes to kind of oh, I wanna lean in the thing I'm good at, and I get instant feedback. And you definitely don't get that as a parent, do you?

Jim Woosley [00:34:40]:
That's a you, you know my mistake as a parent, but you learn from it. Your brother Yeah. He he I knew a bit more of the time he got here. I remember one time you were couple weeks ago, 3 or 4, and we had a 2 story house. And your mother, for the first time, I think, left me alone with you. I think

Jennifer [00:35:02]:
she this is being recorded.

Jim Woosley [00:35:05]:
She finally trusted me enough to to to leave me alone with you. And I gave you a bath, got you out, and and it was laid you on a landing by the steps. Had you laying on a towel, drying you off. And I needed another towel, stand up and reach to get another towel out of the bathroom, and you rolled down the steps, which is about 10 or 12 steps. And you rolled all the way down. Fortunately, they weren't padded. You were crying and all, and I didn't know what to do. I did call EMS.

Jim Woosley [00:35:36]:
And EMS comes and looks at you, and they say, well, I think she's okay. She, yeah, maybe stop crying by the end. So, I didn't take you to the hospital or nothing, but I didn't know what to do there with you.

Jennifer [00:35:49]:
Yeah. Well, I'm glad that you called in the cavalry. They always think that you can handle it by yourself.

Jim Woosley [00:35:54]:
I knew I knew to call professional help. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:35:57]:
Well, you know, we were talking about the difference of being a first responder parent. I did bust my lip open once at the track, and we weren't sure about stuff. And so we got in your squad car, and you're like, I don't know. And we were gonna go to the hospital maybe. It was before they had urgent care. And you saw EMS pulling in to McDonald's, and you pulled them over. You put your sirens over on and pull the EMS truck over to make them look at me and make sure, does she need stitches or not? So the benefit I don't think you had to pay a co pay for that either. We didn't get charged an ambulance fee for you saying Hey.

Jennifer [00:36:37]:
Does my 8 year old need stitches? So

Jim Woosley [00:36:41]:
yeah. So the job didn't pay you much, but you had some benefits.

Jennifer [00:36:45]:
Well, and I definitely think that I can see that. Like, I definitely see the benefits of you being a first responder for sure. So, well, I appreciate you letting me interview you. Anything else that you wanna tell when the call hits home?

Jim Woosley [00:37:00]:
Well, no. Just, tell you that, I think you and Ashley are doing a good job, and I I'm proud of both of you.

Jennifer [00:37:08]:
Well, I appreciate that. And, again, we wouldn't be able to do this podcast if it wasn't for you and her dad. So you guys know Ashley always does this best, but when the call heads home, Ashley and I are here for you. Thank you.