A Year of Connection, Growth & What’s Next

Jennifer [00:00:06]:
Hi. I'm Jennifer Woosley Saylor. I'm a licensed professional clinical counselor and the kid of a cop, and this is the podcast when the call hits home.

Ashlee [00:00:14]:
Hey, everyone. It's Ashlee Gethner. I'm a licensed clinical social worker, and I'm also a child of a police officer.

Jennifer [00:00:22]:
Welcome back to the podcast. I'm Jennifer.

Ashlee [00:00:25]:
And I'm Ashlee.

Jennifer [00:00:27]:
Welcome. Welcome. It is just Ashlee and I today. Why is it just us today? Because schedules are crazy, and all our other guests we've booked out, so it's just us today.

Ashlee [00:00:40]:
That's so true. We do have guests lined up, but we both have been working real hard these last few weeks. I I can't even believe we are in April at all.

Jennifer [00:00:50]:
Oh, I'm I'm I'm not okay with that. I need it to be, like, March. Like, that would be good with me if we could have just a couple more days in March before it's April.
6
Ashlee [00:01:01]:
You know what we need to do? We need to do, like, the Ellen show, and, like, we need some we need some people who will just fill in for us sometimes.

Jennifer [00:01:08]:
Like, please sit on the podcast.

Ashlee [00:01:10]:
Like, can you just actually do this for us because we

Jennifer [00:01:12]:
have weird around it? Actually, I guess it will be me and the guest host because I have nothing better to do. I'm here for this podcast.

Ashlee [00:01:22]:
Stop it. Stop it. Stop

Jennifer [00:01:24]:
it. But

Ashlee [00:01:25]:
we are excited because we were talking this morning, kinda collecting our thoughts, and, wow, guys. Like, we are literally just a well, it's been a year. It's been one year since we started when the call hits home.

Jennifer [00:01:39]:
Which is wild. You know? We were talking about that beforehand, and this was just a little seed of an idea. You know, I think, Ashlee, you and I talked about a book. Like, that's where this started. It did. Thank god I didn't have to write a book. Probably you were thinking I just finished a PhD, and I had

Ashlee [00:01:59]:
to read all these books.

Jennifer [00:02:00]:
I wanna get some payback for, like, I'm gonna I'm just gonna read my book now. Oh. So I can't believe that this, like, little seed has approached to a little sapling now in terms of it being a year for us. And we were just talking about, like, what do we wanna talk about today, and, I'll speak for myself, Ashlee. I got pretty flooded. Like, we could talk about this. We could talk about that. We could talk about this.

Jennifer [00:02:24]:
We could talk about that. And so we just wanted to come on and talk about all the things. And I think I first wanna say is we wanna talk about what you guys want us to talk about. That's definitely what we're here for. We're here for you, the listeners. I mean, Ashlee and I can just talk all day. We just don't have to record it. So this really is about what you guys want to hear from us.

Jennifer [00:02:45]:
And one of the things that people have reached out about is kind of peer support is one of the things. Mhmm. Ashlee and I have talked about after Breeze episode, just talking more about, postpartum and what happens when we invite a baby into our homes and our lives. That's something we've talked about, financial wellness for first responders and the importance of this. Are you guys here in the spectrum of things that we're, like, trying Correct.

Ashlee [00:03:14]:
Yeah. I've also gotten such a slew of, like, retirement. Hey. What about our retired officers and firefighters and, you know, first responders? And I'm like, yeah. Officers and firefighters and, you know, first responders? And I'm like, yeah. That's so true. I mean, both of our dads are retired, so we do have that, but I think we we are just skimming the surface like it's been a year, and yet there is just so much out there that we still need to discuss and and circle back to. Right? Like, these conversations, they don't just end after one time.

Jennifer [00:03:44]:
No. Not at all. I think, again, I what's most recent right now is Bree's episode and talking about what that's like to be a new mom, which was so generous of her to come on and share that and the impact of that and being a first responders family. And so I'm just like, oh, we need to talk more about that for sure.

Ashlee [00:04:05]:
Yeah. And Bree's, episode, man, we just have to thank her real quick again because we got so many messages, just so many people reaching out. She did incredible. I think she just opened that book for a lot of people to be like, oh my goodness. Yeah. I need I need to talk about this or I need to hear this. I feel validated that someone else is feeling the things that I feel too. And then so I am just extremely grateful for that.

Jennifer [00:04:32]:
Absolutely. I mean, I'm appreciative to all our guests. That's for sure. And people that are volunteering and wanting to be on episodes, and people that, you know I mean, they're giving out the most valuable thing, which is time for us to talk about some pretty serious things at times as well. So

Ashlee [00:04:51]:
Absolutely. But, yeah, let's let's circle back. Let's start with the peer support stuff because Okay. Oh my gosh. I feel like my acids are so bad today. I'm sorry, everybody. Dang Invisalign.

Jennifer [00:05:00]:
I think you noticed more than anybody else, Ashlee.

Ashlee [00:05:03]:
Oh, I can see. I'm sitting here like, oh, boy. We did get a few messages about peer support and our thoughts on peer support. And I think that we have to be mindful because we're not. Like, we're Exactly. Connections. Right? So, like, I wanna put that out there. We are not peer support isn't necessarily our bread and butter.

Ashlee [00:05:23]:
I will say that it is something that I am most recently really diving into and having this incredible opportunity to look at different policies that have been created and different things that are being implemented throughout different departments. And everyone does it a little bit differently. I am a fan of peer support. That's a Absolutely. Fans of it. Of course, I am. Because as clinicians, we know that the number one thing we can do after a traumatic event, right, to help the brain start to process is to talk, and that's not always with us. I always say in my trainings, like, look to the person next to you and just start a conversation, and you're helping yourself.

Ashlee [00:06:00]:
So I do know that peer support is incredibly important, but I also recognize that with that comes a lot of hurdles and challenges for these departments. So, Jennifer, I don't know if you can speak a little bit about, like, your perspective on peer support or maybe even take it back a little bit. I think I jumped ahead of what peer support looks like sometimes for

Jennifer [00:06:21]:
people. Performance. Well, I appreciate what you're saying because the most important thing and something I always let any client that unless I have a therapist that's a client, is that I have no clue what it's like to do your job, and that is very true of first responders. I do not know what it's like to do a dispatcher, a police officer, a firefighter, a paramedic. Like, I have no background in that. And I think the peer piece is that when you get to talk to people who know the job, I think that that is the peer part. You know? I was at a meeting, with firefighters, and they're talking about the truck. And, man, that thing is awesome, and I have no clue.

Jennifer [00:07:05]:
And, like, they're explaining it to me. And, yeah, I have two firefighters together, and they they have their own shorthand and know that language. And so I think that's the the important part of peer support is just somebody that knows what it's like. I think and, you know, I wish we maybe had a little bit of a family therapist here to talk about systems and family systems and, you know, in departments, in firehouses, in dispatch rooms, you know, there are dynamics that show up. And sometimes those dynamics can really impact a peer support team. And so, unfortunately, I'm talking about a negative impact where, you know, there's somebody there that maybe didn't show up as a peer with the best support

Ashlee [00:07:54]:
Yep.

Jennifer [00:07:54]:
Or they showed up as a peer only representing the agency and not representing maybe what ends in the best needs. And, you know, I wanna give credit to the peers because that's a fine line to walk. Right? Like, you have to think about the whole at times and not just think about the individual. And so I think those are some hurdles or some hang ups that can happen with peer support. And so I think the most important thing in this is

Ashlee [00:08:25]:
where

Jennifer [00:08:25]:
do you feel like you can trust somebody?

Ashlee [00:08:28]:
Yeah. I was just about to say.

Jennifer [00:08:29]:
Okay. You go with that then.

Ashlee [00:08:31]:
Well well, because right? Like and I don't mean we will make sure to spin this because there's so many beautiful positives too, But there is truth to that. I think what I see mostly or what I hear in my office or even just the trainings that I do and talking to other first responders is, like, trust is huge, and yet there's such distrust within departments sometimes

Jennifer [00:08:55]:
that

Ashlee [00:08:55]:
people are like, no way am I gonna go talk to somebody that I know and give them everything because then the rumor mill is going to start or they're gonna break confidentiality, and they are going to say everything I told them, and people are really skeptical of that. However, right, like, that is where we need to push as clinicians for these departments to make sure that they are doing everything they can for a strong peer support team because that didn't happen.

Jennifer [00:09:23]:
Well and I think the again, you know, to definitely promote you in your business. But I think, you know, this partnership with a mental health professional and a peer system or peer support system is so ideal because, again, you know, to have the training about the importance of confidentiality, how do we active listen? How do we do these things and approach in a way that's nonjudgmental or advice giving or, you know, those things and support that peer system to offer that to people that are struggling and building that trust. You know, I think that that's a great kind of thing. And, obviously, that's a very biased opinion to say, oh, you know, a mental health professional along with a peer support team would be great. And I don't even think it has to necessarily be that, but I think that's a good example of how that can be really healthy. And and, you know, this is just from the perspective of hearing about unfortunate events that happen with peer teams. This is not us coming for peer teams at all. They're a beautiful grassroots organic way to support your team.

Jennifer [00:10:35]:
It's just we wanna make sure that those are healthy places.

Ashlee [00:10:39]:
Yeah. So I'm gonna I am gonna give a little bit of a plug here. And, again, I don't know everything. I work in the state of Wisconsin, and so every state kinda does things differently. One thing that I will say is that I have been blessed to work with departments, one in particular who has done a phenomenal job of building a strong peer support team. Like, I look to them and I'm like, man. Like but it took them a long time to get there. And not only that, they are very, very strict with it.

Ashlee [00:11:06]:
And so in this world that I run-in in Wisconsin, right, like, in order to have a peer support team be effective, they do require a mental health professional to be there. So I think a lot of people have heard of, like, CISM training.

Jennifer [00:11:22]:
Mhmm.

Ashlee [00:11:22]:
Right? When we run our debriefs and you have to get trained in that, like, you you have to have a mental health professional for that. And that's for a reason. Right? We have you guys, like, peer support. There's a fine line between being someone's peer and being someone's therapist, and that line can get blurred really, really quick. And that's why we encourage, obviously, a lot of departments, if they can, to find that mental health professional to help with this, because there's you don't wanna cross that line nor should you because you're up here, and that's the purpose of it. Right? And so it is so important to, not only that, but, like, vet your therapist. Introduce them. Yes.

Ashlee [00:12:01]:
Like, I got interrogated when I tell you that I got three people in my office at one time shooting questions off at me to see if I was good enough to be a therapist for these police departments around here, that's what happened. Right? And every single time someone new discovers me, they send a few of their people that come do the same thing, and I and I love it. But that your therapist but, yeah, you have I I do think, like, in order to have that successful, like, broad spectrum, if you want something huge, you have to network and you have to make those connections because it is hard to manage, I think, like, peer support on its own without being like, okay. Now where do I send these people for resources if it gets

Jennifer [00:12:42]:
there? Right.

Ashlee [00:12:44]:
Right?

Jennifer [00:12:45]:
Absolutely. And I think that, you know, it's this kind of triage level as well too and knowing the difference of that. You know, there is somebody that is just going through some growing pains with their career or having just a little bit of a stressful situation at home, they can go speak to a peer and, like, done and dusted, like, things are good. And then there's other times where it's it's a crisis. You know? And sadly, it's a crisis. Like, they need to go to a hospital and because they're not safe. Like, I I mean, there's this level of of need, and all of those things need different supports and different level of escalations and things like that.

Ashlee [00:13:33]:
Yeah. I can also speak to a little bit. And, again, it's not saying this is correct or wrong or whatever. It's just what I've seen working well, would be that the departments that are really dedicated to peer support, right, like, they have a wellness coordinator who is an officer, you know, somebody who is there, and that's their sole job, job, though. Like, they have literally designated a role. And I know that's not possible for everywhere, but they designate this role of a wellness coordinator who plans all these things. Right? Like, that person's kind of their the head, like, peer support person. They get everything in line.

Ashlee [00:14:11]:
They they help with policies and trainings and all these things, and they just solely focus on that. And to me, that's so heartwarming because what does it send? It sends a message to all your people that, like, we really are trying here. We really are trying to give you something. Right? Like, we really want your mental health and your physical, financial, right, like, wellness programs almost, like, to be a priority in this department. But I do think that when I've seen departments have like, not have that, and there's always, like, that one or two or three people working together to try to create something beautiful, which, oh my goodness, we need them. Right? But when they have that job on top of all their other responsibilities, it is so hard to get it up and running.

Jennifer [00:14:55]:
It is. It takes a lot of work. And it has to be, you know, a labor of love, that's for sure, to support, which is you know, that to me is this podcast for sure. But when those wellness coordinators reach out to me, to other, you know, therapists, it's it's great because I think their job too is sometimes, like, let me do a little bit of the leg work. Mhmm. So we're not kinda going back to our previous episode, actually, when we were talking about therapists and trying to find the right therapist. You know, some of their job is trying to vet what hopefully would be a good fit for somebody that they know they can refer to. And so that is good when they're doing that leg work or creating those lists of, like, hey.

Jennifer [00:15:38]:
These are, you know, professionals that we would encourage people to see.

Ashlee [00:15:43]:
Yeah. And I think too and we are gonna have a really special episode coming soon, but I think excited. I know. Did you see, like I wish they could see our we will do video soon. I think it's, you know, it's it's warranted, especially with some really amazing people coming our way. But as soon as I said that, I like my little smile, like, because I'm just so pumped.

Jennifer [00:16:04]:
Tickets are booked. Yep. Yes.

Ashlee [00:16:08]:
But I definitely like, and, again, not trying to go negative with it, but I think something important to discuss too is, like, in terms of peer support, how much are our higher ups included in this discussion?

Jennifer [00:16:22]:
I think that's a good point.

Ashlee [00:16:26]:
It's a hard point because I get it on their end. But on a different level, like, when there is way too much involvement, again, I think the department the people within the departments are then more hesitant and suspicious and nervous about their information being shared to people of higher rank and what that look like. And I'm just gonna be obviously, we're put out there and people can judge me. I don't care, but, like, I don't believe there should be much, if any. There are times when it's necessary, but that's very few and far between that higher ups are involved with peer support.

Jennifer [00:17:04]:
And I think that yeah. I totally agree with that for sure. And I, you know, I feel like the only place that would be would be a safety concern. Yeah. And what's happening in people's relationships or what's happening with people's attitudes. I mean, those aren't things that bosses need to like, that's not a safety concern. It's not a safety concern at all. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:17:34]:
So I hear what you're saying with that. And and, you know, that and I don't think that this is just it's clearly unique to to first responders. I mean, I saw that hugely in the military about you know, and they're not citizens. Like, those are soldiers, and hierarchs are gonna know everything. And yet we wanna help people and, like, how do you navigate that? And it can be extremely hard. But I think it's this whole idea too and what you know, I I hope us having these conversations is also just about that empowerment of what you can do for yourself. Yes. Go talk to your support team, but, no, that's not the only place.

Jennifer [00:18:14]:
We're telling you there's other places that that you can find support and navigate some of these things. And, again, like, I don't know what it's like to be a a first responder, but there are a lot of things. Like, I just learned more about a fire truck. So, like, there are some things that I can talk about or an engine. Excuse me. See, I mean, I'm not even saying it right. So, like, I'm learning. So but, no, I think that there are places.

Jennifer [00:18:41]:
I also think that I don't know about you, but, again, circling back to what we were talking about with therapists. I do think we're seeing more and more people that are having second careers in the mental health field that were former law enforcement, former firefighters, former paramedics. You know, they they are kinda heeding that call for their brothers and sisters.

Ashlee [00:19:06]:
Yeah. Absolutely. Just met somebody this week, actually. Told me actually, two people, yeah, that told me they're currently law enforcement, and they told me that they are now back in school to become a mental health professional. And I just think that's so beautiful. Right? And there is so much to to say that, like, turning to somebody who gets it is so much easier, and it just feels better. And I under I mean, even for us. Right?

Jennifer [00:19:34]:
Like Mhmm.

Ashlee [00:19:35]:
Turning to another therapist and being like, oh my goodness. I, you know, I had a really rough day. And and for that person to be like, I get it. Yeah. We've been there.

Jennifer [00:19:44]:
It Yeah. Those are when we're not recording the podcast. Those are the things we're talking. Yes. Those are the conversations.

Ashlee [00:19:51]:
Don't let all my secrets

Jennifer [00:19:52]:
out. Never. Never ever. Well, I feel like we definitely focused them on peer support. Are there other things in terms of just this getting to be me and you and that you wanted to talk about today.

Ashlee [00:20:06]:
Yeah. I think something that we haven't touched on that we wanna do more of, and I'm gonna hand it to you because you spoke beautifully right before of course, we always say things very beautifully right before

Jennifer [00:20:19]:
we Yeah.

Ashlee [00:20:20]:
Before. But then it's like recording in progress, and we're both like, oh. But, right, is that we have had a lot of run ins. I don't wanna say a lot, but there are times where we have run ins where financial concerns for first responders and their families are a pretty big deal. And and I don't I don't know that we have enough support for our first responders in terms of finances and what that looks like and maybe why we do see a lot of our first responders struggle financially.

Jennifer [00:20:55]:
Yeah. Well, I am definitely not the financial expert by any means, but I think this is also what we're looking forward to in terms of as we continue in another year with when the call hits home is to talk more with experts on this field. I do see and I think, you know, we all see financial struggles. And I think that that gets more and more in trying to navigate, you know, just having financial freedom, but to manage when you have a family and your income and what that looks like can be really hard. Sometimes something I see and and something I saw in my home, you know, growing up, is I'll speak specifically for a police officer's home. You know, you you get your salary, and then you have off duty. And off duty can really supplement Yeah. Your salary in a really a positive way, you know, if it can be a positive thing.

Jennifer [00:22:01]:
And then from the aspect of a family piece, though, well, this is kinda what we were talking about before. I didn't record is just, like, sometimes, you know, that police officer is working so much off duty to provide that then the family it it can really kinda create a divide, the family. And so trying to explore that and what that looks like and trying to find balance in that. And, again, the intention is good. Like, I'm making more money. Like, we have, you know, baseball travel baseball. We have to pay for this summer. Like, of course, I have to get these extra hours in and to provide.

Jennifer [00:22:40]:
And yet sometimes we have to look at things from, like, a holistic perspective or a whole perspective of saying, like, well, what do I gain financially but give up Yeah. Connectively with my family? And so just trying to manage that and explore that. And I come back to, like, we wanna know, is that something you guys wanna hear about? Like Yeah. You know?

Ashlee [00:23:03]:
Yeah. And I think we're we're hopefully, everyone's catching on at this point to realize we're kinda celebrating that one year mark and giving you a little bit of what's to come. But I do wanna share from I love that you brought up your own personal experience because I think that I'm sitting here listening to you, and my wheels were turning because

Jennifer [00:23:21]:
I thought you were just spacing out like a little wind. No. I kinda wish. I woulda had

Ashlee [00:23:26]:
a little bit of a break. No. I'm just kidding. But I, so my parents got divorced when I was I I don't know. I think I was 15, 16 at the I was in high school. And there's obviously a lot that goes into that, but at one point, it was just me and my dad. So I lived at home with my dad, and I I will just never forget those last few years of his, like, career because he always worked his ass off to to to make the money for us girls and to provide for our family. But now that I reflect on that as I'm, you know, 31 and and in my own adult life, like, I he had to do everything because so he had the home.

Ashlee [00:24:11]:
Like, my mom had moved out

Jennifer [00:24:13]:
Mhmm.

Ashlee [00:24:13]:
And things like that. And I in that moment, like, I barely saw him because, I mean, he was pulling every every single extra shift he could

Jennifer [00:24:23]:
Right.

Ashlee [00:24:24]:
Because he's trying to pay for the divorce. He was trying to pay for the house. He was trying to pay for us girls still in in different ways. We were a little older, but still, I had sports. I had, you know, everything that I had in heat. I mean, every little event. Now nobody judge here. We we listen.

Ashlee [00:24:40]:
We don't judge. Isn't that the on one hand, like, now I'm looking back. I'm like, oh my gosh. So he would, like, literally work so much, and sometimes he would stay out in that area because he lived, like, forty five minutes from where he he worked.

Jennifer [00:24:55]:
It would

Ashlee [00:24:55]:
just be me at home, and I'll be at home, like, throwing parties.

Jennifer [00:24:59]:
I'm not

Ashlee [00:25:00]:
sure. What? What? I'm innocent. I

Jennifer [00:25:03]:
swear. Right.

Ashlee [00:25:05]:
And stuff like that. And and, you know, because he was just not home. Like, it was just me at home. But on the other hand of that, I think that when I look back on that too, like, that's where me and my dad grew super close because I respected that he was working so hard. And I would try my best between everything I was doing, work, school, sports, like, to have Parties.

Jennifer [00:25:26]:
To, like Mhmm.

Ashlee [00:25:26]:
Well, those were in there, and I, girl yeah.

Jennifer [00:25:31]:
That we need to stop recording. We need to stop recording. No. I yeah.

Ashlee [00:25:36]:
I don't know if any other I'm just gonna put it out here. This is what this is about. I, like, saw old photos the other day, and, like, me and my friends would literally take my dad's work shirts and use them as Halloween costumes. And I the other day, I was like, oh my gosh. What were we thinking? Like, but it was easy. I was a police officer for Halloween then.

Jennifer [00:25:56]:
I didn't have to go get a costume. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Ashlee [00:25:59]:
Anyway, back on track. But he, I swear some child of first responders gonna be like, yeah. I did that, dude. He I mean, he worked really hard. And so on the interim, like, I would do things too. Like, he would make grocery lists. Sometimes they made no sense. They would be like hot dogs, chocolate chips, a bag of chocolate.

Jennifer [00:26:18]:
I'm like, what why do we need this?

Ashlee [00:26:20]:
But I would go grocery shopping. Right? I would cut the grass, and I would do whatever I could to help him. And we really just kinda figured it out together. And and, like, I mean, it's on

Jennifer [00:26:32]:
one hand, when I look

Ashlee [00:26:33]:
at that, I'm like, man, it was sad. On the other hand, that and I'm like, him and I just did it. We just figured

Jennifer [00:26:39]:
it out

Ashlee [00:26:40]:
together, and we just did it. And that's probably a big reason. I don't share it often. I don't know that I've really shared that much with anybody. That him and I are so close now is because I feel like at one point, we just looked at each other and we were like, we're we're a team. Like, we gotta

Jennifer [00:26:56]:
We're gonna be against the world. Yeah.

Ashlee [00:26:58]:
But that financial pressure that he was under at that time, like, I can't even begin to understand, and I don't know that I want to. But I think his story resonates with a lot of first responders. Right? I think you hear that a lot, like child support, lawyers. Not only that, but sometimes some of these these men and women get on the job so young. And all of a sudden, you're getting all this you're getting some nice money. Looks like nice money when you're young. Right? And so, like, we don't ever learn, like, those things might come down the line and we need to save. So we start spending that money because we have it.

Jennifer [00:27:34]:
Or if you're off duty and don't take your taxes out and then what the IRS will come and get. Yeah. I mean, I've I've crazy stories about that too. And, again, you're young. Like, I didn't understand. I still don't understand taxes, and they're coming up. But you know what I mean? Like, I they that's something you have to navigate with all this. And, again, I'm not a financial expert.

Jennifer [00:28:01]:
I'm not here to kinda tell you guys, what to do or who to invest in by any means. But I think just to say, like, hey. This is a added layer and added stressor that can really happen for first responders and how to manage all of those things.

Ashlee [00:28:18]:
Yeah. And I think that we have a a cool person maybe coming on to help us discuss that a little bit more in detail. Yeah. And I I do think it's needed. Right? Like, we need to talk about it. We need to discuss it. We need to give them resources. And I'm a good person for that.

Jennifer [00:28:34]:
I'm not as with that. Right? Yeah. Yeah. And yeah. And I think also too, like, what works for your family. I mean Yeah. You you kinda have to manage that, and and and that takes that deeper work. Like, listen.

Jennifer [00:28:48]:
There is a spender and a saver in my family, and I wish I was the saver. But with that being said, like, there's good in both of those things. You know? If there's two savers, there's no fun. And if there's two spenders, there's no money. And so trying to find that balance. And, you know, I grew up in a home where there was a lot of tension around money, and that can really impact, you know, how we feel about it. And so those are all, like, deeper questions that you have to answer, which goes back to Jeremy's episode and talking about, like, that ability to kinda look in the mirror and and sit with yourself about, hey. What what's there that's bothering you? And so I think that that's something I hope that the podcast is always encouraging.

Jennifer [00:29:39]:
Like, hey. Just take some time to think about you and reflect on those experiences that you've had.

Ashlee [00:29:44]:
And I would encourage our listeners to do that now. Right? Hey. Look it. We are opening this book to let you know that we do have some things coming to help you guys, like, hopefully, write some resources or some information. Take that moment after this episode and think about that. Right? Like

Jennifer [00:30:01]:
Do you know that they say I don't know if you've heard this before. I mean, this is like a psychology thing that your belief about finances is pretty solid by the age of seven. So what you believe about money. Yeah. And and you think about that from you know, that's not a seven year old is in finance. That's a seven year old that lives in a family and how they spend money. You know? If it is a a wealthy home, it flows. If it is a paycheck to paycheck home, it's something that we have to be scared around.

Jennifer [00:30:39]:
Like, you know and for me, it was just money always causes fights. That is my belief. If we talk about money too. There's gonna be a fight. And, like, I had to work through some of that stuff. And and this episode, we're definitely oversharing. Like, my husband and I have definitely had fights over money. I mean, I think that that's what happens.

Jennifer [00:31:00]:
And I'm very fortunate in that, you know, have done some work on that and been able to make it on the other side of those, like Yeah. Hard tension driven conversations. I feel like we're much more on the same page. I hope he would say the same thing. I think he would. I think he would. But, golly, we're all over the place today. No.

Jennifer [00:31:22]:
I love it. I know some, like, superpowers. Money.

Ashlee [00:31:26]:
I'm like, we're not, though, because I feel like this is what we need to do to connect. Right? Like, I and I we've never even talked about these things together. And so, like, I can connect with you on that level big time. Like

Jennifer [00:31:37]:
Right.

Ashlee [00:31:38]:
I'm such an anxious scared human over money. It is not even funny, and and that does come from my childhood. Like, it absolutely does. But, also, on the interim, like, the other hand of that, right, like, maybe that's why I work so hard in life, and that's because that's all I saw was in order to make that money, in order to get what you want, in order to be who you wanna be, like, you gotta work hard. Like, that work ethic comes into play. And, yeah, maybe sometimes I overdo it. Right? I don't stop. We all know that.

Ashlee [00:32:08]:
But but to me, that's, like, a huge reason why. Like, I have to keep keep it coming because, yeah, like, I'm scared, anxious over finances for sure.

Jennifer [00:32:20]:
Yeah. I definitely understand that and appreciate that. And, you know, on your own business, it's its own other financial thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we won't get into that. Yeah.

Jennifer [00:32:31]:
But I hear that. And what I come back to, and this is definitely my thesis statement from, you know, this year of podcasting, is that first responder kids, like, find a way. Like, we take something and and we put it into action. So you saying, like, oh, I work hard because I know that's what it takes in order to have some financial security. So I I think that's great.

Ashlee [00:32:56]:
Absolutely. And I I know we are we're definitely approaching our time frame, but I do wanna say as we kind of transition that we have not forgotten about our retired first responders.

Jennifer [00:33:10]:
Yes.

Ashlee [00:33:11]:
That was awesome. Some very cool things in our pocket for that as well. And I'm excited to share a little bit about our next guest who will who will be a retired officer and some of the really beautiful things that he is now doing after retirement. And I think it'll be kind of fun, and I think it taps into both the retirement part of things that we're talking about now, but also the financial things that we just spoke about. So I'm I'm excited. I'm, like, very excited to have this opportunity to, like, show what an retired officer is doing in terms of kind of financial stability and just, I guess, fun.

Jennifer [00:33:52]:
Yeah. Well, I think it goes back to to our previous episode with Catherine, like, that, you know, your life doesn't stop with retirement, and you have to have a plan. So, yeah, I agree with that completely. I am excited for, yeah, upcoming guests and especially, I think, these episodes where they we get to offer bang for your buck. You know? You get two for the price of one. So

Ashlee [00:34:18]:
Absolutely. Well, I am again, one year of this is a blessing.

Jennifer [00:34:23]:
I'm It is.

Ashlee [00:34:24]:
Excited. I can't wait to see where the next year takes us now that we do have kind of a little bit more of our self like, our feet under ourselves, right, in terms of all this. I think we have a lot coming, a lot more connections being made, which is just beautiful. Yeah. I don't know. It's really just an honor. I say that all the time, but it's true.

Jennifer [00:34:45]:
Well, I I did have a funny story I wanted to tell before we wrap up. Good. Since you're mentioning uniforms, and it kinda does have something to do with retirement. So I remember my dad retiring and him having just a pile I mean, a pile. This is, you know, like, thirty year career, a pile of, uniform shirts. And he was, like, going through every one of them. And he had so his department switched names. It was, you know, Louisville Police Department, and it changed to Louisville Metro Police Department.

Jennifer [00:35:21]:
So he had two different patches and, like, sitting through and, like, taking out those patches. And, of course, they, spot notice adolescent. I'm like, why are you doing that? Like, why are you taking all this time to do like, just put them in the goodwill pile and and he was like, Jennifer, they can impersonate a police officer. And I was like, oh, sorry. Like, I didn't even think about that. Like like, you know, like, that's something you have to protect, and I appreciate that he took and that was not helping him. Like, he didn't he didn't have enough scissors. He had

Ashlee [00:35:55]:
to do it at all.

Jennifer [00:35:56]:
He didn't have scissors. Yeah. But I remember I felt kinda dumb. I was like, oh, I didn't have Did

Ashlee [00:36:03]:
you ever wear your dad's, like, fleece shirt? Probably don't

Jennifer [00:36:07]:
think so. I definitely I don't know if he'll be able to find it, but my brother definitely my dad had, like, the old it was a pretty bad bad jacket. Like, old school leather. Like, he wasn't ever a motorcycle, but it was kind of like a motorcycle leather. And I remember my brother wore that as a costume one year and stuff, but I had no interest in being a police officer for her costumes. I'm covered.

Ashlee [00:36:37]:
I was like, ah, I'll just do it.

Jennifer [00:36:39]:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. It's smart. It's very budget friendly. Very budget friendly. See, I'm the spender.

Jennifer [00:36:44]:
I wanna go buy a new costume. Pay attention, Ashlee. No. I'm just teasing. I just wanted to tell that. Silly, so

Ashlee [00:36:52]:
I love that. No. Absolutely love it.

Jennifer [00:36:55]:
But I do think in coming up on this anniversary of a year, It's I just wanna thank our listeners. Like, we're here because of y'all, so thank you guys so much for giving us of your time. We appreciate you. Love all the interactions online and post. Let us know what you wanna hear more about. And you wanna take us home, Ashlee?

Ashlee [00:37:17]:
I'll take us home. I I do agree. I think that if we can if anything, take this moment after this podcast, give yourself, what, five minutes, jot some thoughts down, some ideas down. Where are you at in life? And, give us the feedback. We wanna hear from you guys, what you guys keep the questions coming, keep things coming so that we can interact with you. But, overall, you guys already know this, but it is my favorite to say that just never forget that when the call hits home, Jennifer and I are here for you, and we will see you guys next episode.

Jennifer [00:37:47]:
Thank you.