20230223-Better Practice Podcast Ep 1-Sarah Westcott "Social and Professional Networking"

Lisa Sretenovic [00:00:00]:

You. Lisa Sretenovic.

Sarah Westcott [00:00:04]:

The Velocity Detective.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:00:05]:

And this is the better practice. Podcast. It's where we empower entrepreneurs to create a thriving business while they focus on their families. And today we have a special guest, Sarah, with us. Sarah, tell me a little bit about you.

Sarah Westcott [00:00:26]:

Lisa, thank you so much for having me on your podcast today. It's so much fun to be here. So I have been a solopreneur in my own coaching practice for the last 15 years. And an interesting thing happened way back in the day when I started my practice because I am generally an introvert, I'm generally not a people person. And I started my business 15 years ago with the idea that if you build it, they will come. And I learned really quickly that that is not necessarily the case. And I could even have national paid advertising spokespeople saying my name on the radio. And it still wasn't necessarily enough to grow my business to the point that I could feed my family, let alone focus on my family. And so I had to begin to brave other ways to get my name out there, to build what I call visibility that would lead to some credibility that would hopefully eventually lead to some profitability or dollars in the pocket, actual paying clients. And so I began to braid the networking scene and it was not pretty in the beginning. Again, I'm naturally an introvert. The idea of having to meet new people in an unfamiliar situation and oh, gosh stand up and speak in front of someone and try and tell or a group of people and tell them what I do, it was not pretty. I was sure people could see the sweat marks under my arms and I'm standing there shaking like a leaf. But a funny thing happened along the way. I got good at it and I got good at what works for me. And what I learned is what works for me isn't necessarily going to work for everybody, but there's always going to be something that will work for you. That's my journey is that I have spent 15 years growing a business as a solopreneur and have built to the point that I don't have to do a whole lot of sales and advertising in order to do what I do.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:02:19]:

I love that as business owners, one of the six divisions is, of course, sales and marketing. And we need systems in order to help us in each division create that time that we need to get out of it. And so having something that is systematic, when you think about networking, it makes it so much more intentional. And when you have that intentionality, you've got a little bit more focus and that gives you that extra time. One of the things that you mentioned was that you were kind of this introverted and kind of scared a little bit maybe to do that networking. I'm an extrovert. I love to talk to people, but one thing that I find just really, really icky about, especially about open networking events, is when somebody comes up to me and immediately starts that used car salesman group right?

Sarah Westcott [00:03:30]:

Yes.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:03:30]:

Makes them feel so I don't want to come across that way. How can I talk about my business without giving off that salesy vibe?

Sarah Westcott [00:03:43]:

Love that. So here's the thing. I start with this foundation of thinking about being a networker as a very organic experience, and it really is about how can I connect myself to other professions or professionals who can help me get to where I want to go? But networking has to be really a way of life. And so I'm really thinking both in terms of my warm social network of family and friends and how can I talk about my business to them. Those should be low hanging fruit in terms of people who already know me, like me, hopefully trust me, who want to be part of my success story. So how do I network in the concept of the context rather of my warm family and friends and people who already know me? And then how do I network in a professional environment with people I don't even know yet, who I want to build professional relationships with? And it comes down to this idea of changing the mindset. Many of us, when we network, when we start wanting to talk about our businesses, immediately want to go into sales mode and hunt down the next client. And so I often encourage clients to think about networking in terms of instead of hunting, we're farming. How can we build some farming relationships that take time to grow and build and cultivate, but that over time build up that trust factor that leads to ongoing referral opportunities. And so when I'm thinking about that in terms of my warm family and friends and network, that's the low hanging fruit. The one thing I always say is be prepared for the question, hey, I haven't seen you in a while. How are you? Or, what's going on in your life these days? And you think about that. You've got this, Lisa. Most of us think of that as a throwaway question, and so we give a throwaway answer. How are you today, Lisa?

Lisa Sretenovic [00:05:34]:

I'm just fine.

Sarah Westcott [00:05:36]:

Right, exactly. And then we go into the weather or the football scores or what's going on with my family and kids. And those are all good things. Yes. But also we talk about the things we're passionate about. And so I encourage us just to start being excited about what we're doing in our businesses as naturally talking about it as we do, how our families are, how our favorite football team is or anything, or I had a cold last week, or we talk about our health and the weather. And so for me, it's about, how are you? Oh, my gosh, I'm doing really great. My business is really thriving right now. I'm working with these great new clients that I'm loving and just it's raising the awareness of, oh, my gosh, Sarah is a business owner. But did it sound like I was selling to you, Lisa? No, I'm just talking about I may be sharing a little bit more intentionally about this is the kind of clients I'm working with, and this is the challenge that I have. I had a client call me last week, and they had just had a baby, and they called me from the hospital to tell me that the reason they missed their appointment was because they'd had a baby and it was a high-risk pregnancy, and she was in intensive care. I mean, who calls from the hospital to call their financial coach? But what they said to me was, this is the first time that this life crisis is not also a financial crisis. Thank you so much. And so, you know, in the 30 seconds it just took me to share that story with you, that's the kind of cool thing that I'm sharing. That was something fun that happened to me last week. What have I told you? I've told you a little bit about my kind of clients. I've told you a little bit about the transformation I have with them, whatever. And it's just a natural conversation. So that's kind of thing number one is, how do you do the other piece? Then? How are you doing in professional settings? It's going back to that mindset of instead of hunting for someone to sell to, educating on, who do you work with? What does your ideal client look like? Why would they buy this thing from you? Why would they work with you? What's the challenge that they're facing for which you're the solution? And that's a great way to be able to talk about standing at the open networking event. Well, what do you do? Well, I work with suddenly single women who are trying to start their own businesses but are feeling overwhelmed with all the things they need to do to take care of their family and run a business at the same time. Did I just sell to you? No, I explained exactly, but I didn't tell you about multilevel spreadsheets. I didn't tell you about cash flow. I didn't tell you about anything to do with business coaching or strategic networking or finance. I just told you who and what their challenge was. And that then takes away the salesy approach to that networking thing. It's also, by the way, a great way to turn the conversation around. If you've ever been at a networking event where you get cornered by somebody who's trying to sell you their ginsu knives, that's really interesting. I don't happen to be in the market for that right now. But tell me more about the kind of people who buy what you sell. What are the challenges that they why is it that they buy what they're buying? That way, if I come across someone who'd be a good fit for you, I'd know better how to introduce you. And again, I'm turning that conversation around so that they're no longer selling to me, but I'm asking them to educate me on who their clients really are because I'm not their client. I didn't go to that event to buy their knives or their card processing system or fill in the blank, but I would love to know who is your client and what are the things I should look for and listen for that might indicate a good introduction for them.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:09:33]:

I like that. It gives me a way to not have to say no, but give them value anyway, right?

Sarah Westcott [00:09:45]:

Escape the conversation. Run away. Run away.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:09:53]:

So awesome. Let's go back to your knives guy, right?

Sarah Westcott [00:10:02]:

Yeah, maybe.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:10:07]:

I know a couple of people that are in the demographic or whatever that he's trying to sell to, but this.

Sarah Westcott [00:10:22]:

Is the one, the next step. You want to know what that next step is? Yes.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:10:27]:

Relationship with this guy, right?

Sarah Westcott [00:10:30]:

Yes.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:10:31]:

Because as it turns out, we like a lot of the same things. He's indirectly associated with some of my ideal clients.

Sarah Westcott [00:10:42]:

Right.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:10:43]:

So I think maybe there could be something there.

Sarah Westcott [00:10:46]:

Right.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:10:47]:

So how do we get that started beyond, okay, here's my business card.

Sarah Westcott [00:10:54]:

Right? Exactly. Because we go to these open networking events sometimes, and it's the business card shuffle. And how many of us have ever made it home with a pile of business cards that we never look at again, or it's just that awkward spam that comes afterward? Either we're sending it or we're receiving it, or they don't know us from Adam, and we haven't built up enough credibility yet for them to even want to take it to the next step. So I have a dear friend, Amy Kilpatrick, who came up with this always get-a-yes technique for open networking, and it's one of the most brilliant things I've ever used, and it just works all the time. It works in lots of different circumstances. But the scenario basically is this. Yes, I've met someone at an event it's a professional who may share my ideal client using the suddenly single moms, a divorce lawyer who's working with suddenly single moms, for example, or whatever. And I'm sitting here saying, that seems like someone that I need to build a relationship with, that we could probably have some good referrals back and forth with the language I'm using, then, is what we call the always get a yes technique. It's would you be interested, Lisa, in getting together further at another time so that I can find out more about you and your business and who you serve so that if I have clients who may need what you offer, I'd be more comfortable introducing you.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:12:24]:

And so think about that.

Sarah Westcott [00:12:25]:

Again. I love it. It's just absolutely I wish I could take full credit for it, but I use it all the time and think about that. Because here's the thing. Would you be interested in getting together further so that I can find out more about you and what you do? Who doesn't want to talk about what they do? I've already set the stage that I'm not coming to try and sell to you. I want to find out what you do, who you work with, because I think we may share a similar type of client mix, and I want to find out more about you and who you serve, and how you do it. So that if I have people who would be a great fit for you, I'll have the confidence I'd be more comfortable being able to refer you and to know how to refer you. So I'm coming in with this idea of how can I give and become part of your center of influence. How can I help you look like a rock star? How can I help you grow your business? And then in turn yes, in the process of we get together later, we're both going to share some opportunities. This is what my client looks like. This is the things you can look for to help me grow, too, that givers gain. If I want to be part of your success story, you in turn, over time, will naturally, probably want to be part of my success story too.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:13:38]:

And I like that better than just, hey, can we get together for coffee or cocktails? Because it's already set the stage for what the conversation should be about, and there's at least some expectation that it should be a two-way conversation. Yes. I'm asking you to give me some further details about really who your client is. Not the high level, but the really nitty gritty and how you do business.

Sarah Westcott [00:14:14]:

And what your values are.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:14:16]:

But naturally, as you pointed out, with the potential referral side of things, but even at that very beginning of conversation, there should be a reciprocal, hey, if you're going to tell me about your details, you'll want to hear about mine, right? That's not what I'm saying initially, and if it doesn't happen, that's okay, we'll.

Sarah Westcott [00:14:44]:

Have another opportunity to get together, right? Generally speaking, once they've had a chance to tell me about their business and they feel heard, and again, I'm going down a path here, but I'm taking notes. I'm asking them questions about who and what I should be looking for and what a good referral, what an ideal client looks like. If I could pass to a home run referral, a home run client, what would that look like? You'll work with anyone. A lot of people will say, oh, I work with anyone. Yes, that may be true, but if you had a choice, what would your favorite client look like? And so when I've gone through that process of asking them and they feel heard, even if it's just a polite thing about what you do. Sarah and maybe we will have run out of time and I'll say, you know what, I don't want to take more of your time today because it's been like 3 hours and sometimes that's the case, but let's get together further. I'd love to share more about that with you or yes, we still have plenty of time left, but I'm so glad you asked. And then at that point, again, I'm going into training them, educating them on who and what, not selling them on my thing.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:15:54]:

Right. Again, especially if you're looking at it from the referral partner perspective, even if they are an ideal client of potential.

Sarah Westcott [00:16:06]:

Right. Yes. They will self-identify if they're the right. And I have had people absolutely. When I'm sitting and explaining my ideal clients say things like we make great money, where the hell does it all go? And they say, oh my gosh, we say that all the time. Maybe I need to work with you. That's great. But that's like the cherry on top of the ice cream sundae. That is not the meat of what I'm doing here. I would much rather teach you how to send me a steady stream of clients like that. And it will just be a bonus if you happen to become one of my clients personally.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:16:38]:

Absolutely.

Sarah Westcott [00:16:40]:

There are two other pieces I want to jump in real quickly so they go back to this idea of would you be interested in getting together further so that I can find out more about your business? Not only does it set the stage for that, but instead of just inviting to coffee, there's two things that also happen. Number one, we're setting the stage that I want to find out more about your business and not sell to you. But number two, and it bears saying I have had people misinterpret or before we use this and I think I'm accepting a business meeting and they think it's a date. So that's just another little subtle thing. I know that's off the topic of referral networking, but for women in referral networking when we're speaking with someone that we don't necessarily know, this language also helps very clearly set the stage. I'm not looking to date you, I'm not looking for cocktails or coffee for anything other than I want to find out about you and your business. So that if I have clients who need what you do, I'll be more comfortable referring you. It keeps it professional.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:17:46]:

I love that.

Sarah Westcott [00:17:47]:

For what that's worth. Little bonus tip there.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:17:56]:

Now we've kind of shifted the idea of actually selling when I go to a networking event to instead looking for a potential referral partner type person. Right.

Sarah Westcott [00:18:11]:

Yes.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:18:15]:

So I found this person that I think would be really great to refer to me, that in your scenario, maybe that divorce lawyer but most of my people are already divorced, so I might not have a lot of people I can send their way. Now I'm going to feel like, okay, I can't give back to them, and it would only be a one-way street. How do I get past that in my head?

Sarah Westcott [00:18:45]:

That's a great question. Let me give you a couple of examples. One that I often get is what if I need I'm new in my business, so I don't have anybody to refer out yet. That's one. Or do I need more than one divorce lawyer? I need more than one kind of professional in order to get enough referrals for my business. How do I do that if I can't send everybody back to that person? And that's a really important question. So where I'm going to start with that, Lisa, is how many people do you know casually? Friends, family, acquaintances? Do you think people who know your name?

Lisa Sretenovic [00:19:23]:

Oh, my gosh, a couple of thousand, probably.

Sarah Westcott [00:19:29]:

The average American knows, at least in a warm setting of some kind, four to 600 people. People who would know you. That's the thing. We don't always have to have a formal client to be able to refer over. We already know our warm network of family and friends and people, and our job is just simply to keep our networking ears open so that when someone says, I have a need for I'm looking to remodel my kitchen, eventually, we'd love to be able to go buy a new house, whatever it is that they're saying. I'm going to be in the natural habit of thinking through my mental Rolodex of who do I know that I can introduce them to. I want to be I got a gal. I want to be the one who, when someone says, I have a need, I got a guy, I got a gal, I want to be the one that people know, Sarah knows someone. If I want to remodel my kitchen, go find Sarah, she'll know somebody. I don't care what the industry is. And so that's also what I'm doing. Let me reverse it for a moment. That's really where I want to go reversing that, which is, even if I can't send you, Lisa, a single client, I can help you look like a rock star to your circle of influence. Because when you have a network that you're the one that everybody knows, Lisa's got a guy, Lisa's got a gal, it's building your credibility. And so not only are you helping people just with the specifics of their business or just with the daily life of helping them get a meal or something, but you're also the person who's got the connection. And how grateful are they when they have to rehome a turtle and Lisa knows the person who might be able to help them rehome a turtle? You've made their life easier. Right. And so when you build a strong referral network, outwards, it makes you look like a rock star to your network. And so even if I can't ever send you a client, I can, in fact, do a great job of making you look great to the people you send to me. So even if it's not an equal sending back and forth relationship, I'm going to help you set apart by Sarah, I mean, Lisa referred me over to Sarah and Sarah took great care of me. Lisa couldn't do this. That wasn't part of her business, but Sarah could. And I'm going to go back to Lisa because she took care of me in the broader sense.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:22:08]:

In the broader sense.

Sarah Westcott [00:22:10]:

And when I'm thinking about choosing Lisa versus some other professional to do that, you've got better credibility because you've got the network of experts that built you up. So I don't know, I hope that makes sense. But that really is the heart of referral. Relationships don't have to be a one to one and you build up each other's credibility in multiple ways. So my job as the person you sent to is to treat your clients and your referrals the way I would treat my mother. And that makes you look good.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:22:47]:

I'm glad you love your mother.

Sarah Westcott [00:22:50]:

Yes, assuming I love my mother. I do.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:22:56]:

Awesome. I feel empowered to be able to go into a networking event and this works whether it's in person or online or quite frankly, even if it was like an e introduction over email. Right. So it doesn't have to be this in person, but at my next opportunity to have an introduction to somebody instead of directly selling to them, it makes more sense to utilize them in more of a referral way. Especially if I can get them to tell me what they do. Right. Instead of just saying, I'm the Velocity Detective and I empower entrepreneurs to create a thriving business while they focus on their families. Not about me, it's really about them. And when I can do that, I don't feel so salesy.

Sarah Westcott [00:24:00]:

It's about not the what but the who I work with. You know, I work with entrepreneurs and I work with entrepreneurs to help their businesses thrive while still focusing on their failures. And it's it's explaining the who and the challenge you solve or the benefit that you're bringing to them. More than I am a business coach and I help people with all of the things.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:24:26]:

Just because my program has a very specific thing to it. But that's not the outcome. And really, even though, yes, I want them to know what it is that I do, it's really important that I get it from them.

Sarah Westcott [00:24:44]:

And it gives them the opportunity then to say, oh, that's very interesting. Tell me more, what kind of entrepreneurs do you work with? And then you can begin to paint the picture of, are you working with solopreneurs? Are you working with entrepreneurs who've got such and you can give them more of the details to paint the picture? And then they begin to think in their head, it's something the reticular activator. They begin to think about it in their head. Who do they know that looks like that picture? Yes, maybe they'll self-identify, but they're not feeling sold to, which puts the wall up. Instead, they're beginning to think about, oh, well, I know Julie, and she started her business two years ago and she's feeling overwhelmed and like she doesn't have time to spend with her kids. They begin to think about Julie and say, oh, I've got this friend you need to meet. Julie yeah.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:25:36]:

Sarah, we're about at the end of the podcast. Tell me how we can get a hold of you.

Sarah Westcott [00:25:44]:

Thank you for asking. So, yes, I am on both LinkedIn and Facebook. It is Sarah Westcott, the Wealth Coach Personal CFO. You can find me there as well, and I can give you all the contact information to make sure that that is there as well. I've got a website which is Sarah webwestcot.com. Sarah with an H. Westcott.com and it's my passion to help impatiently, successful, ambitious professionals who are great at what they do, but maybe need a little bit of extra help figuring out how to get more clients and how to get more referrals. That's my passion to help people who are great at what they do grow their businesses without feeling salesy in the process.

Lisa Sretenovic [00:26:28]:

Oh, I love that. Thank you so much for being on the Better Practice podcast. Totally. I'd love to have you back.

Sarah Westcott [00:26:37]:

Thank you. I would love that as well. Thanks for having me today, Lisa. Absolutely.