2.4 Relaxing vs. Efforting: How to Release Energy Through Grounding | Energy Reset Part 4

For Part 4 of the Energy Reset series! In today’s episode, we explore the difference between relaxing and efforting in grounding. Often, we think that grounding requires effort, but sometimes the most powerful practice is simply relaxing into the process.

2.4: Relaxing vs. Efforting in Grounding

This is Part Four of the Energy Reset series. I'm talking about grounding, the different strategies you can use for grounding, and what grounding really is. So if you haven't watched the first three videos, I suggest you go back and get caught up.

Today, I want to talk about effort versus relaxation and which one is better when you're grounding.

The quick answer is that neither is better—it depends on what you're feeling and what you need. Sometimes you need to put in some effort, and sometimes you need to release. So today, I'm going to be talking about relaxing and what that looks like versus efforting.

I'll talk about efforting next time because relaxing is a very powerful practice—when you just relax into releasing. So what does that mean?

To recap the strategies we've talked about before: you want to make sure you're in a place where you feel safe.

You can do this standing or sitting, with your eyes open or closed. Remember, we're moving our awareness into the body. There's a misconception that you have to do this with your eyes closed, but you don't.

Many teachers suggest closing your eyes to reduce distractions since you’re not seeing what’s in front of you. However, you can keep your eyes open as long as you're able to move your awareness inward and notice what's happening inside your body.

So, you're going to bring your awareness back into yourself. One way to do that is to breathe. Take a breath in through your nose if you can. It doesn't matter if it's through both nostrils or if one is blocked due to sinus issues—just try to breathe through your nose as much as possible.

Notice the air as it comes in through your nose, filling your lungs, expanding your chest. Feel your shoulders moving, your belly expanding. All of that helps move your awareness into your breath.

As you breathe out, notice your shoulders relaxing, your tummy contracting, and the air moving out through your nose.

Depending on your connection with your body, you will feel some of these sensations as you're breathing, without needing to pay too much attention. The more you practice, the more you'll notice your awareness in your body.

Once you bring your awareness into your body, the second step is to notice what’s happening. Where are you feeling sensations or emotions? I like to think of this as where you're feeling energy.

You may feel tension at the top of your head, tightness in the back of your neck or shoulders, or maybe a shortness of breath and a stuckness in your chest. You could feel constriction in your heart center or belly, or discomfort in your lower back.

Just notice what you notice—there’s no right or wrong way to do this. When you bring your awareness into your body, whatever is most active will stand out. Whether it's your shoulders, back, or tummy, that’s what's most active.

Once you notice something, put your awareness there for just a second. For example, if you notice tightness in your chest, place your awareness there. You can even give it some dimension—notice how wide it is, how strong it is. Can you give it a color? What do you notice?

Then, start moving that sensation down into the earth. You can give it boundaries to see how big it is, and then move it down. If it's really tight or wide, move it into the earth. Follow the sensation down your body and let it move into the earth.

As you do this practice, which is part of grounding, you'll feel connected to the earth. If you're seated, you’ll feel the weight of your body in the chair. If you're standing, you’ll feel your feet on the floor and how your weight is distributed.

As you move the energy down, you might feel a sense of heaviness, like gravity is pulling you down. That’s one way to know you’re grounding—feeling connected to the earth and feeling gravity’s pull.

But that's not really what we're after. What we're after is the release of anxiety, the feeling of peace, the sense of having control over our lives, and regaining calm and clarity. We want to make sure we’re moving any sensations we feel into the earth to achieve that.

Now, sometimes we need to relax. There’s a practice called "focusing," and it’s about bringing awareness to whatever comes up and just noticing it.

It’s like when a child is playing, then falls and scrapes their knee. The best reaction is compassion. You don’t react with fear; you just pay attention and give them the support they need, knowing they’ll be okay. In the same way, bring awareness to what’s happening in your body and just be with it.

Don’t go into the emotion—don’t try to analyze it or figure out why it’s there. Focusing is just about being with the emotion.

It takes 60 to 90 seconds for most emotions to process. So if you can commit to just 90 seconds of being aware of that sensation, give it some visibility—like being there for a child while they get back up. Just notice and let it move.

Don’t go into the emotion, tightness, or sensation—just notice it. If you can be with it, you’ll notice it starts to soften, move, or even feel warm. That’s when you feel release.

When you relax into it—this is what I mean by relaxing—you’re just noticing. You’re not trying to do anything with it. As you focus on that sensation, you’ll notice it loosening or becoming like a warm rush, like a shower. These are all different ways of releasing.

Sometimes you’ll even have physical releases—like burping, yawning, tearing, or your intestines grumbling. That’s tension being released from the body.

For today’s practice, add 30, 60, or 90 seconds of just being with the sensation before moving it down. Sometimes, you won’t even need to move it—once you focus on it, it may release into the earth on its own.

Next time, I’ll talk about efforting—what to do if you focus on the sensation for 30, 60, or 90 seconds and it doesn’t move.

If the sensation gets bigger or overwhelming while you're focusing, start moving it down. The key is not to go into the emotion but to notice it. If you feel like you're going into the emotion, stop focusing.

Sometimes we just need practice to develop the skill of maintaining separation and staying in awareness versus moving into the emotion. That’s not helpful for this practice.

We want to stay as observers, in a state of awareness. Practice that for the next several days, and next time, I’ll talk about what to do if the sensation doesn’t move.

Thank you so much for joining me, and I’ll talk to you next time.