Challenging Perceptions: The Ugly Bug Effect

Are your opinions holding you back from seeing the beauty in the world? In this thought-provoking episode, we dive into the "death of opinions" and explore how our perceptions shape our reality. Join Kim and Jill as they share a unique experience involving an "ugly" bug that challenges their views on personal truth. Discover how letting go of judgments can lead to deeper understanding and compassion.

Key Takeaways:
- Our personal truths are often just perceptions, not absolute facts.
- Holding back impulsive reactions can foster better communication and relationships.
- Compassionate perspectives allow us to see beauty where we once saw flaws.

Tune in for an enlightening discussion that will inspire you to rethink your own beliefs!

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Hello, lovely listeners, and good morning, Kim. Good morning, Joe. Good morning, everyone. Get in a quick yawn.

So today we have death of opinions. We're going through a lot of endings. The death of our perceptions, our opinions, what we thought were our truth. And yeah, Jill had a very amazing experience just a little bit ago that really brought this up.

Yeah. We were gonna go a whole other direction. As a matter of fact, we were in the midst of going a whole other direction when this very not so beautiful moth buggy thing entered my reality through my cat hunting it. And I had to cut off the call because I had to cut off the hunt and save this. Try to save. Anyway, I think I saved it. This all called a bug, which I then took a picture and sent it to Kim. And I was like, my opinion. I'm like, it's ugly. I'm like, no, it's not ugly. It just is like, I'm like, okay, my brain doesn't know how to not have an opinion about this. I'm gonna say it. Ugly bug. I mean, he's ugly. But that... I... I'm struggling, Kim. How can I drop my opinion? Because it doesn't matter. Right? And to him, probably from his viewpoint and his culture—his culture, his bug culture—he's beautiful.

Yeah. He's like the top of the top.

Yep. And we're over here judging him on how he looks. Shame on us.

And that's... It's like, that's what's happening. We are the judgments or the perceptions that we have towards other people or other belief systems—that's all being stirred up—and it's actually like getting put in front of our face.

And we need... and it's changing that. There's a death there. There's a death of how we're viewing things. There's a death of what we think our truth is.

Because we think that's ugly.

No, no, that's not dying away. We gotta make a different choice.

And that was actually our original topic: about our personal truth, our truth, speaking our truths—and how we were saying that a lot of times when we speak our personal truths, there's actually very little truth in that.

What's going on there?

It's like just because we call it personal truth doesn't make it a truth at all. It's still our perception; it's our opinion; it's what we think; it's what we believe.

And we're arguing that stuff with people; we're arguing it with ourselves sometimes; we're engaging things with people; we're sharing our—I'm going to quote it—personal truth with someone.

And when in fact what we're doing is we're putting fuel on a fire and we now created a horrible disagreement with someone.

Exactly.

And Jill and I could, if we think about that bug—we can argue.

And I could literally tell her, "No, that bug is beautiful."

And you're like, "No, it's ugly."

I don't understand how you even think this is beautiful at all.

And then I'm over here trying to tell her how I see from my viewpoint, my perspective, my opinion, my truth.

And you're just like,

"No."

It's kind of like the term agree to disagree.

Yeah.

But it more comes down to: How is your opinion? How is your truth actually benefiting the situation? Is it actually creating peace? Creating calm? Or are you literally adding fuel to the fire?

And it's time for people to really start looking at—

In my eye when I say people I'm talking...

We need to start looking at—

I'm trying to save a bug right now.

Yep.

I'm not kidding. I'm sorry—I don't have a train of thought. He's moving and the cats are moving back in again.

I love this.

This is Jill's compassion everybody—you need to understand Jill has so much compassion for the life around her—not only this bug but people too.

Like you want a compassionate person and you're like you need to have Jill in your life.

She sees; she actually does see a lot of beauty and really listens to people's truth—and yeah she's just amazing.

So I—

That bug is like—with the right person—

Thank you Kim.

And you know as I'm watching him—I mean you know my truth: I'm judging him as ugly—but at the same time the more I step away from that I'm fascinated; he's just got the oddest body wings—I don't know what it is—and then you just watch it and just can move into fascination with it rather than judgment and opinion and clouding our perceptions where it's like well what does it matter?

He is what he is—and like you said he could be the best looking one of these—I’m thinking it might be some sort of cicada—you know I'm really not sure but that would be my guess—and in his or her world they're amazing—they're like beautiful—and I'm starting to see some of the really cool things—the wings—there's a shimmery in the wings—like now that I'm looking past what I judged as ugly there's some cool stuff—there's still some stuff that creeps me out

Yep

And he's going up against some pretty formidable cats—which I love cats—I love cats so much—and I really don't love their hunting instincts—I respect them—but wow

All right

Yeah it's—

But you know for every—we thought this bug might die—there's a death process—but in reality here he's coming out of it with strength because he was showing compassion

So how can we show compassion to other people and allow them to actually thrive?

And it's—

You're going to get the same thing back

Right

Allow other people to give you compassion too

Yep

Just go farther with it; just go farther with perceptions; with judgments; and you know just go farther with it—to understand—as you said there's another space we can go into with it

One of them is non-action

You told a story about that Kim

Yep

Where you just didn't say something—that was your truth—that was your personal truth—and you just didn't say it because you knew it was going to cause—it was going to light up a fire—and you didn't want the fire

And that is a beautiful thing—that's beyond going into that next space

That's what this—

This guy—like here we are looking at him trying to save him—he just had an experience to go into his next space and see what happens

Yep exactly if you sit there—

Yeah

I—

Yep I could sit there and say all the things I want—to push my truth onto another person and say what I want—to make them possibly feel—or from that I'm not validated or heard oh wow this gets deep you guys what's—

What we're holding on to

And instead I did—I held back—and I asked in my head how does this serve anything? Where is the outcome of this? What is your intention by saying this?

And there was no good intention—it was just proving a point—and how is that going to get anywhere?

That I had to learn a different style to communicate with that person—and I did—and it flowed very beautifully

Yeah

And both were honored

I—

To me the key words—the key words are—to hold back—hold back for a moment—just hold back for a moment—you know I'm holding the cats back from this bug right now and—

No but I mean really—and I have a lot to learn about this—I have a lot to learn about holding back when something crosses my mind had been very compulsive very impulsive—you know—and I'm looking forward to holding back more and just pausing and giving a little more consideration to my perceptions my judgments and allowing more space—to get into that beyond place—to get into that maybe this ugly bug is actually kind of fascinating—which means in the end this is very cool because in the end my memory with this will be yeah there was this ugliness to it that did freak me out initially but there was also fascination that came with it too and that really changes the entire takeaway so cool

I love this

All right Kim well thank you too your cats for giving us a beautiful experience this morning into the bug—to being present into the bug into the ugly bug that Jill calls it—and to everyone for listening thank you so much thank you Jill thank you everyone all right thanks Kim have a great day and until next time