Healing, Growing, and Connecting: Mental Health Lessons and Building Real Relationships in Business

🌟 From Basketball to Breakthrough: Dwayne Morton’s Inspiring Journey 🌟

Join us in this powerful episode as former international basketball player Dwayne Morton shares his incredible story of overcoming adversity. Diagnosed with a rare blood cancer at 29, living under a misdiagnosis for 18 years, and surviving a traumatic police shooting, Dwayne’s resilience and faith have shaped a life of purpose.

Find Dwayne Here:

https://www.facebook.com/dwaynemorton;

showup2win.com

🔥 What You’ll Learn:

• How Dwayne reframed his mindset to thrive through adversity.
• The role of faith, discipline, and visualization in achieving success.
• Tools like hypnosis and automation that helped him recover and grow.
• Practical insights into entrepreneurship, authenticity, and connection.

🚀 About the Program: Dwayne introduces his transformative program, "Show Up to Win," launching on February 1st, aimed at helping individuals overcome challenges and achieve their goals.

🎧 Don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, and SUBSCRIBE for more inspiring stories and actionable advice. Share your thoughts in the comments below—what resonated with you most?

[00:00:00] This is Dewayne Morton, and I'm, , very thankful to have you here as a listener. I know that you could be anything else, and so I appreciate you taking your time to hear me. And so I want to thank, the host, Nikki, for inviting me to, be able to share my story.

So just to let you guys know a little bit about me is, I'm Dwayne Morton. I am a former international basketball player. And, I'm here to tell you about how, as a former international basketball player, I had, had to overcome a few, adversity, adversity type situations. And so that's what we'll be talking to you about.

And so, I was diagnosed with a rare blood cancer at 29. And, through my journey, there's some things that like I had to push through. And so at 29 was really where I faced my biggest adversity. So then, will be three years in May. I was involved in a police shooting as a bystander. And so I [00:01:00] had been dealing with PTSD and survivor guilt.

So, that's what I'll be talking to you mostly about, and then we'll talk about 2024, which is how I found out I was misdiagnosed with a blood cancer and how I actually have become to take this journey from being misdiagnosed and having lived my life on hold. To now where you're going to get to see the Dwayne version, the 2.

0 version, the show up to Lindbergh.

You said you were diagnosed with a rare blood cancer. Like, how did that come about? What happened? Okay, yeah, great question. So, I was living in Louisville at the time, in Louisville, Kentucky. And so I just moved there probably less than a year. And I had, actually like I stayed with my fitness routine.

So it was like running, things like that. And what happened was I was going to work and I could get [00:02:00] up three flights of stairs. And I knew that that was an issue because I just ran two miles the day before. And to just kind of give you a little bit more of the backstory is, is like, you know, one test led to another test.

That test led to, hey, we're sending you to an oncologist. And then it was like, why am I being sent to an oncologist? You're just saying, like, I just have this, I'm trying to figure out what, what I have. You're sending me out to an oncologist. And for some of the people who, aren't familiar in oncology as a cancer doctor.

So, you know, that I was freaked out. And so also the other thing that I will share is, uh, my grandfather passed away from a rare blood cancer. So that was part of the, like, how do I deal with this? What can I do? Right. But yeah, so that's how, that's how I found out. Were you going through any treatments for it?

Or for those three, you. Was it three years that you were going through that diagnosis or? [00:03:00] No, so like, so it wasn't, it wasn't three years, it was 18 years. So what they did was they, I was told that I was, three years ago was the, was the shooting. For 18 years I was, I was diagnosed in 2006. So for all this time I felt like, you know, up to 2024 is when I got misdiagnosed, but.

One thing would lead to another, but as far as treatment, I am very fortunate. The type of blood cancer that I had was where they could only do like phlebotomy or bloodletting, which, you know, was just getting rid of blood. And so what would happen is, is my red blood cells would expand. And if you look at it this way, if I was a barge that is floating on a river.

Right. So there's one or two like it's not it doesn't situate the momentum. Right. Barges and ships can. You can [00:04:00] go through that river. Well, but what happens if it's like 10 wide? Then they're all jammed up and they, there's just friction. There's no way that they're going to move really slow. And so that's what was happening with me.

just a lot of ease, which for me, I was terrified of needles. And so I had to get over that fear, too. Well, you know, yeah, it's very interesting. I had to face a ton of fear. So. Yeah, I don't like needles at all and I have to do this. I have to take shots every month. So it gets fun. But, so going into getting, you know, told that you didn't have that.

Cancer like what was what happened? Oh, yeah. So Nikki, what happened was was in March of last year Is it's getting really close to that commercially honestly, and so I went in and I found out that My oncologist actually [00:05:00] moved to Chicago and that was like, okay Well, I really needed the treatment is it I was waiting for, I forgot what it was, but I think I was sick, like, just had a cold, and I was like, I didn't want to bring it in on, you know, cancer patients, stuff like that, so I waited until pretty much the last minute, but I do, I was really tired, and I really needed one, needed a treatment, and so I walked in there, and I was like, hey, I'm gonna get this treatment, feel better, and they were like, no, we have a new doctor, and like, he, you know, prefers to see people before, you know, they, they, you know, we do a phlebotomy, And so a phlebotomy is what I just said.

It's just bloodletting, the listeners that aren't aware. And he, you know, I was, I left that office and I was pretty upset. I was like, Hey, I'm like, I got away a week. It puts me more susceptible to a stroke or a heart attack. So for that whole week, I was freaking out. And then, you know, it's kind of crazy, but you'll find out a week [00:06:00] later that I'm misdiagnosed.

And so, you know, he, he told me, he was like, I just do not feel you have this. I feel like you either have COPD or sleep. And so. He, he released me and so I had to go back to, you know, my primary care doctor and get, you know, set up for a sleep study. Where was your mind after that? Because that's kind of a, like, you're going through all these years thinking you could die at any moment and now you're like, oh, it's just sleep apnea.

Yeah, so when I first was diagnosed, they gave me, like, my parents and my brother, that's why I know that, like, this is a, It's like, and my brother just reminded me a couple of weeks ago. I was first diagnosed with five years, like five. And then it was later on, I moved to 15, but like, that was the kind of things that, so, I mean, I was extremely, extremely grateful when I found out that news, but I also was extremely confused because I've been told for such a long time.[00:07:00] 

And so that's, the thing is, is like, I had prayed every night to get rid of And then when that miracle happened, I was like, Are you sure? That was my first words to the doctor is like, are you sure? So, you know, God granted me a miracle and I still doubted it. I mean, and that's what we do. That's what we do as humans, right?

So it was a moment of hallelujah. Thank you. But it also was a moment of like, I want to see the results like I need to see something. And so, someone, I actually knew someone in the front desk and I was like, tell them about it, about the situation. I was like, I just wish I could see some documentation.

Like, I need to see something where I can understand wrap my head around it. But really, you know, the whole thing is, is that he is that whole 18 years I've learned so much. All these different things and I'm sure we'll go back, go into [00:08:00] detail on that, but I just wanted to share like my mindset was better, but like my mindset took major, major hits over 18 years.

So, I mean, you're getting to see what I call the show up to window. So you're going to see my optimal mindset. But, you know, over the year is where that part built. And so it got built off of me being misdiagnosed to help. 

So for me. I went through a lot growing up and then I had some real hardships a bunch of years ago and it kind of broke my mind and I was in a very dark place for a very long time, right? And when I finally came out of it and looked back, I don't understand how I stayed alive half of it. Like I don't understand where it came from for me to still be here.

And when it came back into my mind and I could actually start doing things again and I could start. You know, getting better, like, [00:09:00] me now versus 2020 even is completely different. So, when you look back, do you have those times when you can go, Oh, yeah, that was a really bad year, but this one was really good.

Or it was all bad, but like, my mind was starting to learn to look for the good kind of a story. Yeah, so, you know, this is a great question. So, I would reframe, like, what you're So for me to have the mindset I have, like I have to reframe everything. So I'm not looking at things happening to me anymore. I'm looking at them.

I'm not even looking at them to the aspect of they happened for me. Like they got me to this spot. No, like things happened through me. So like things happened and it went through me so I can serve and so I can facilitate. Right. But like, it took a, it took a tremendous amount [00:10:00] of work to get there. So what I would say for you is, is like, you were talking about how you didn't know how you got through the past.

So for you and your listeners, what I would tell you, what I would, my advice, is to say, give yourself grace. You got here because you got here. Let's don't, we, we are trying to be complex all the time. We don't need to be complex. Like, let's be something. You got it. So whether it was through someone dragging you to the, to that point, or if it was something that you were just like, every day you broke down crying and then you were just like, time healed wounds, right?

Like you hear that all the time, but like it does. And so it's kind of like that. He is, you just gotta be. You've got to be aware of like what, what, what you do, which you don't have to always like, you don't always have to look at it. When you concentrate on [00:11:00] the past, you get depressed, you get sad. But like if you use that to fuel you, then you're more concentrated on the present.

So the present's the gift, like that is the magic sauce, okay? But what happens is, is usually we try to target our past. Let it fuel us. And then we think about the destination. So just to let you know, like I take a runner's mentality type of, I take a runner's type mentality in my path. Okay, so all I'm doing right now is like I am concentrating going forward.

All I'm doing is is focusing on left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot. I'm not focusing on the destination. I'm just more focused in the direction that I'm going toward that destination. And I think what we do is us as human beings, we overcomplicate things. And that overcomplication doesn't allow us to use our instincts and our God given ability to actually be adaptable.

Does that make sense? So it's like when I talk about having a runner's mentality, let's just say I [00:12:00] got a bill that I wasn't expected. Or, you know, if I was working in, a 9 to 5, like I lost my job. Like those are piles. Those are life. Life is going to happen. Life always happens at some point, right?

So, I look at them as potholes. So, my job is just to run, and when those things happen, I swerve. You have to swerve. You have to be adaptable. Does that make sense? Mm hmm. Yeah. So, I think I answered parts of your question, but I also, like, I also feel all of that 18 years prepared me for me to be here. So, I'll say that again.

All of those 18 years prepared me to get me here. I'm not saying it wasn't challenging, because it was, it was very challenging, but what it did was it allowed me to know, hey, I got through this, how I got through it does not matter, I got through this, and this [00:13:00] put me to where, in a spot where I possibly, in my 18 years, if I was healthy, couldn't have got to.

Does that make sense? Yes. How did you develop your mindset? Because not everybody has that mindset. So where did that come from? Well, so part of it was for sports. I was very self disciplined. Now, did I go through parts of my life and parts of my athletics where I wasn't self disciplined?

Yeah, there's absolutely. But here's the thing is like, those were choices. Those were decisions. So. No one made me go outside when I was four years old and I know this was us four years old. We didn't have basketball goes where you took the height down. Okay, so I practice on typical. So I would go out there [00:14:00] for hours at a time and I would throw this basketball up at the hoop and I was just trying.

I was trying. I wasn't trying to get the shot. I was trying to hit the net, correct? And then once I hit the net, it was to hit the room, hit the room. Oh, maybe it might go in. And so that's the thing is, is we have to change our direction, our trajectory. Does that make sense? So that's what I did. So it created a self discipline young, young boy.

And through that, now, through that, as we go through life, and as we go through, that's where we start going into our fears, our limited beliefs, and stuff like that. So I'm like, I was going through the same thing as everyone else. I had those things that like were setbacks, like your setback is only to set up your comeback.

And so throughout my athletic career, there was these challenges, and either I met [00:15:00] them or I didn't, but I didn't lose. That's what I was going to say, is through this, they weren't wins and losses, they were lessons. And so I either learned through my experience, I learned through someone else's experiences, or I learned through someone else's experiences.

And that's where I learned self discipline. The more hard, the more stricter self discipline. Like, if I want this, if I want those type of results, then I'm willing to do x, y, and z. Does that make sense? Yes. And so, that is how I actually got to the place I'm at, where I got to go play basketball, because my basketball journey is not The typical path by no means like I didn't play my junior or senior year in high school.

I quit my junior year. My grandmother passed away. I didn't know how to deal with that. I didn't know how to deal with, having somebody, a family member that I was close with, like not be there. And so that's where I found my spirituality. That's where, you know, I found my [00:16:00] faith in God. And I think that's The turning point for me to become a better basketball player, to be more disciplined, to be more Christ like, was really what fueled everything else.

And when I, when I accepted Him as my Lord and Savior, that changed everything for me, because I found, hey, I didn't, I wasn't doing it just for me. I was doing it for a higher purpose. I hope that, I hope that really resonates with people, is that, and so I would go outside and do drills, and I would be Man, there's no way I could go to college with that.

There's no way. There's no way I could ever. Like, there is no way. There's no path. What God told me to do was there'll be an opportunity. I just need to be ready for it. And so when there was an opportunity, I was ready for it. And that's, that's the thing. It's how I got overseas. It's how I signed to an agent.[00:17:00] 

All of that happened because I had to prepare, but God gave me the opportunity. I just had to be prepared for opportunity.

Where did you play? Where did I play? So I grew up in Western Kentucky, I'm from a small town. I played at two high schools. I played one year at Marshall County. Which is a pretty career high school in this area. And then I transferred and went to a smaller school in the same district, called Callaway County.

And that's where I actually, got my, diploma. So through this, this is where I was going to tell you, Nikki, too, is I taught myself visualization. I didn't know what that was, like, so it started as a kid, a few years earlier, so whenever we learned how to type, right? I learned how to type, and then I would go and I'd see the words on like TV or, and I would think about that keyboard, [00:18:00] I'd visualize that keyboard, and I would remember where the letters went, and I would use my hands, right?

So what I did was I took that concept that I taught myself and I applied it to basketball. So I would go and I would do my workouts in basketball and then I would sit at home, you know, in a lazy boy and probably playing probably Nintendo or Sega Genesis at that point. I don't remember which one was out and I would ice my knees because I had two really bad knees so I could, you know, as I'm doing this, I decided, you know, like I probably shouldn't play video games.

I probably should try to figure a way to do the drills in my head. And so I did that. So I closed my eyes and I would do the drills in my head. Up and out to me, I found out that I get the same experience and confidence as if I was in my backyard doing the same exact drill. [00:19:00] And in my mind, guess what? The shots went in.

The shots always went in my mind, you know, outside the shots may be with this sometimes, but You know, the shots always went into my mind. And so that was the thing. So I drove by confidence that made me a better basketball player. So that's, that's really the most important aspect of it is like, I basically did the drills twice.

I'm sure your niece appreciated that you didn't physically do them twice. Yeah, absolutely. My niece loved it. And so, you know, it's just like this podcast. Like, I would visualize that me and you have this conversation the night before, earlier today, just like, it gives myself confidence experience because I'm new to this.

Like, I'm absolutely new to this. I'm, you know, I'm a completely raw, just authentic. And, you know, I know I have a high trajectory, but like, I know I have to have a starting pattern, too.

While saying you have a high trajectory, there are a lot of [00:20:00] people who are famous for speaking on stages and stuff. When you get the chance to go beyond those stages, what does that look like for you? What are you going to be speaking about? Oh, I think it's overcoming adversity. I think it's that I think it's using sports to show people how to overcome things like so my ideal client is someone who's an athlete or ex athlete who's dealing with a diagnosis medical or dealing with like, just a right.

And just need help to get some momentum movement. So movement creates momentum. So that was the thing is like, I always move. It might not have been a lot, but I knew I moved that day. It didn't matter if my parents or my brother or someone else recognized it didn't matter. I moved. The trajectory and stuff is like, I'm not worried about how it gets done.

I'm just worried about allowing it. So when I get the opportunities to take them and not be scared, Because that's the part that stops [00:21:00] everybody. I'm just gonna push through 

also on purpose, girl, I want to help people. This is not all about me. I have been either way. You look at it for me. I look at it as fortunately, other people might look at us. Unfortunately, I've had to go through two very traumatic experiences to put me where I'm at. And so, It would be really sad, I would be really disappointed if my time ended and I didn't use my gifts and my talents for a purpose.

If I don't do it because I'm scared, that's even worse. I had to learn that fear is, fear is holding you back, but your courage to keep moving is what everybody's going to see at the end of the day. They're not going to see how scared you were at, at 6 a. m. or whatever time you wake up for me. It's not 6 a. [00:22:00] m. but they're not going to see when you first wake up that you're like, oh, no, I have whatever to do today.

It's going, you know, the courage you go and going up and doing every single day is what people are going to see. So, so I have an exercise to teach people about courage.

Turn off all your lights and have a flashlight in your hand and just think how everything's dark. When you turn on the flashlight and you're able to eliminate parts of it, you start feeling more secure. So we can look at it back in the caveman days, same thing they had when they had fire, they had torch, you know, and they were able to explore the caves.

So that's the thing is, is like courage is that, that light. And so it can be either God given, like we can pray for it, or like we can, establish it by [00:23:00] eliminating light to know, to know the area that, you know, before it was dark, we don't know the area. Hey, there's a table, the chair, or, you know, a shoe. Like, just think, think of this.

If I shut the light off in my bedroom, and I just threw a pair of shoes out in the middle of the floor, I set up like a trap, right? And I don't even know where it's at. Like, I was just, But if I had the flashlight, I can go and I can locate him. I could find the shoe and be like, okay, take away the trap.

Does that make sense? The same thing. It's just like, our, our, our minds are so powerful. It's our limiting beliefs that stop us, but our limited beliefs were there to be there for security. It's just our, we live very complex lives compared to like how humankind and human nature was built for. So when we see a bear, like When we're, in the caveman days or a dinosaur, it was a really good fear.

It was to keep us [00:24:00] safe, but like public speaking or being on your podcast or being on someone else's podcast, like those are pretty minimal fears, but that's the ones that are terrified of people. And then there's another aspect of it is we ask students every day to do stuff that most adults are too afraid of or too scared of.

But we expect an 8 to 10 year old kid to, hey, get up and like, tell us your favorite thing. Hey, come to the front of the class. So, isn't that kind of, isn't that kind of odd that we're asking these kids to be courageous and brave, and then most adults can't do it, or won't do it. I'm not a, I don't like the word can't.

But they won't do it. Yeah, that, now you see that when the, those, Maury Povich used to have guests on that were absolutely [00:25:00] like, couldn't see a spider, they'd fall apart screaming and crying and he had one, you know, they had different people, you know, different things people were afraid of that they would do that to.

And then they had somebody that would help them get over their fear and they'd show them coming on later and like not reacting to the spider. And while I was still reacting to the spider, even though it was on TV, and I want to know piece of that, like, no, no, no, keep that in the box. But, it was wild to me, first of all, that they had that strong of a reaction to whatever, because while I may not like a spider, it's not going to make me cry.

I'm not gonna well, I'm gonna start yelling for somebody else to come get it So I used to be very careful with snakes And it took my friend who's a master hypnotist And I want to share that because that's part of my mental health journey is I went through talk therapy, you know after shooting They didn't really do much for me It actually like kind of pissed me off more than it really [00:26:00] helped Because I had to think about it going there and had to think about it but also, hypnosis took it from like a level nine or 10 to just even.

I'm indifferent about it. I'm not. I can talk about it. All those type things where before, man, I didn't want to do anything. But just to give you my experience with hypnosis, I think everyone should do it. It allows you to overcome certain things. And it's pretty, it's invasive. That's the other thing, but the other aspect is like, I was very fearful of snakes.

And the very first day after I went through hypnosis, I actually sit and watch a snake at our, in our family's pond. And I normally would have been like, got cold chills, all that. I was just like, I just observed it. I didn't see it as like, Oh, I want to go over and pet it or hold it. No, I didn't want to do that.

And, you know, people that have pets for snakes or [00:27:00] snakes for pets, cool. Like, that's your thing. But like, I don't want to do that. I just want to know that if I see one, I'm not freaking out. Because when I was a kid growing up, if I saw them in a textbook, I would just drop the text. I was not a happy camper when we were like going over to science class and they were like, and you know, going over a snake and I'm like, yeah, I just would drop the book.

And then I tuned everything out. So,

But yeah, so I mean, people who have fear spiders, all that stuff. And so, our mind is extremely powerful. It's us that like stop it. And so I wanted to share that because I think that's a really big part of my story is how I helped, how I overcame it. And then that built this mindset that was already there.

And it just like strengthened it. All I did was I just went to the gym and it just, lifted and worked that whole body. Through this to build this type mindset. Okay. So, when you help [00:28:00] people, what is the, what is one little tiny gem you're willing to give away? Like, what is something everybody should do that they're not doing?

And that when they get to you, it's the first thing you have to, like, curb or whatever. Okay. So the first thing I do is I tell them to begin. Can't do anything without taking the first step. So that's the thing. It's like they come to me, they're willing to take that first step. So I'll help them take the first step.

And then we create a program that like works for them. So it's not even a program. I call it a playbook. So everything is a playbook to me. Everything is based off of sports or like for me, I like to use basketball. It's a playbook, you know. We have all kinds of plays and all these things are supposed to happen, but most of the time, when we run a play, a lot of those plays don't really happen the way they're supposed to happen.

For the people who aren't familiar with sports, they just don't happen. So, [00:29:00] I give people a set amount of plays. So, like, let's say I give them 30 plays. So, out of those 30 plays One or two that they don't like, or that doesn't fit them, correct? Let's say if I said, hey, you got to wake up at 4 a. m. I don't tell anybody what they have to do.

These are suggestions, these are guidance. So if I read, so if I went and I picked up a self help book that's behind me, and I read it and I applied everything to the fullest of the author's intention, the self help book is going to work, correct? So what happens is, what happens is we don't do everything that the book says.

So We put our own little adjustment. So what I've done is I've created this program that allows you to pick and choose a little bit. They're not these big, huge things, but they're, it's adjustability into people's lives. Okay. So I wanted to talk to about the [00:30:00] shooting, just because we haven't really addressed it yet.

So just to give people a better idea of the shooting is. I was involved in a police shooting. I had my three year old niece in the backseat. A criminal took a hidden gun and shot an officer and through that there was a shootout. I got caught up in the crossfire as I was driving by. So a bullet hit the truck.

The bullet never hit me. Okay, the bullet hit the seat pillar, which is where the roof of the truck and the bed of the truck, there's a piece of metal where those, those meet, okay? And, if the bullet woulda went to the left, it kills me. If the bullet takes, goes to the right, kills my little niece. So I was dealing with PTSD and survivors guilt for, two and a half years until I met the hypnosis.

So I just wanted to kind of give you guys a better, broader spectrum. So when I found out I was misdiagnosed, [00:31:00] I really was dealing with the aftermath of the shooting because I couldn't understand, well, what purpose do I have if I'm going to die? Because you gave me 15 years and I can't live past that aspect.

Does that make sense? That's where my mindset was. Also, Nikki, there was these different things and challenges all throughout 18 years that like were building blocks, like Legos. To how my mindset is now. So it was like, whenever I'm on a podcast and stuff, they say, there's some people that are close to me and say, I don't talk about the challenges of enough.

I don't talk about the negative part. Well, there's a whole 18 year span. I take the parts that are usable and positive. And I use that to create my Lego castle. I don't have to go talk about the dragons that I slayed. Correct. Like they're there. I promise they were there. There was times where. There was times when the girlfriend broke up.

[00:32:00] There was times when, you know, the rent couldn't get paid because, like, I was sick and I wasn't able to work. I mean, there's things that like people just don't understand. There was all types of challenges. I just wanted to be, I'm a very transparent person. I'm telling all this, like, it's all going to be in the book.

Most of the time, I don't have enough time to really go into that type of detail. So I just wanted to let you know, and let your listeners know, like, there was challenges, there was tons and tons of challenges. There's days that like, what I want to emphasize, The most important thing out of all of this, through the challenges, I never was suicidal.

Never once I knew that other people had it worse. Whatever my nightmare is, is someone else's dream. And there's an aspect of like, in my past, when I played basketball, when I was on the trip of being overseas and playing basketball, I met this young boy who was five years old at the time. [00:33:00] So at 19 years old, I learned my number one lesson in gratitude.

And so this boy had not eaten in three days, and he had eaten rock so his belly didn't hurt. So I never had to worry about food, water, or shelter ever in my entire life. So I always knew someone else had it worse. So when I got diagnosed, same thing. Someone has it worse. When the shooting happened, someone has it worse.

So that has always driven me. That's always inspired me that, like, I have more pieces of the puzzle than someone else. I might be talented more than someone else. So I really want people to really reframe that like our resources and the things we do not have is usually our focus point. So we really don't need to focus on what we don't have.

We need to focus on what we have so we can build what we are dreaming to make. 

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We are going to talk about kind of what entrepreneurship looks like in 2025 from what people are thinking of anyway. Right. So, so far, everybody is saying that, 2025 is the year of making real connections.

It's not about having, I mean, AI tools are [00:35:00] there, you're going to run into them, but it's about having a real connection with people, real connections with the people on your social media on your email list, that kind of thing, because. Not everybody on your email list is the same person. They all have their different things.

So breaking them out into sections or whatever, however, that works for you and sending things that are maybe a little bit more personal to those groups is better than just 1 to the whole group. Or, on your social media, making sure that you're replying to people that comment, you know, saying, oh, thank you for being here or whatever, their comment is, maybe making a more points on it or, you know, just interacting with the person because, 

but we, we want to actually interact with our audiences, and we want to build on that and make sure people know that there's a real [00:36:00] person behind the brand, like, you sharing your story for people now, the people who come to you for coaching know more about you before they ever get to you and they know that you are the person they want and they're going to be willing to support you.

To pay the money to to do that, because you're out there and you're building the Know, Like trust without even knowing that you're doing it. So, entrepreneurship is extremely important to me. I was very fortunate. My parents owned a small business when I was like, 4. I think my dad was self employed when he became self employed.

I believe is extremely important, especially in today's terms. To be able to take responsibility to take ownership of what you want and so my parents gave me that gift of seeing the hardware. So, my dad owned a, [00:37:00] exhaust business. So, he put on car mufflers. So, here's the other thing I'll tell you.

Like I said, I'm 100 percent transparent. Neither of my parents went to college. My dad was actually a high school dropout, went straight to the Navy. So I've learned these valuable lessons that they told us. Like my daddy said, Hey, you need to get your eyes going for sure. He's like, unless you want to work with your hands, like me, like if you want to make money, it's hard work.

That was his part of the mindset that was given to me, but through, through my childhood and through different aspects, like I learned how to grow a business, but how to maintain a business. Most people can start a business. Most people who grow a business, most people challenged, are the most challenged, with, maintaining the business.

And that, honestly, [00:38:00] that's because they're not ready to be a business owner. I'll just say it. Most people who are business owners that don't understand how to be sociable. So here's the thing. I treat people like how I want to be treated. So, somebody can be an asshole to me and I'm still going to be pretty.

I won't be flexible. There's going to be points where I'm going to have to have posture and I might have to be like, Hey, I don't want to work with you. Like, that's the other aspect. So throughout business, we have to learn these lessons. And if you don't learn the lessons that are given, then guess what?

You're going to get more lessons, more struggles, more challenges. And that's part of the problem with. Entrepreneurs is that they don't want to learn. They just want to do the thing. You can't just do the thing and make and make money. You have to be personable. Authenticity is like the number one thing.

But most people will tell you it's like it's [00:39:00] not. But if someone actually likes you, that I don't mean that from like a people pleaser side. I just meant like they respect you. And as long as they want to do business with you and you do business and an admirable and consistent, and also in a servant type of manner, you're going to have a successful business.

But let me ask you a question, Nikki. If you sent me an email about your podcast and I let it sit in my inbox for three days and I didn't say, Oh, hey, I'll get to you later, right? How You're probably going to lose some like, know, and trust, right? Mm hmm. So apply that to a business person. Like if I said, hey, I'm looking for X, Y, Z, and I send these e mails or I send a message and, you know, over 24 [00:40:00] hours, they don't, they don't comment.

You see where. That's part of it. It's like we have to do on to others as we want others to do on to us. Mm hmm, and I feel other people don't live by that golden rule or It's just basic Simple common sense stuff and we live in a world where common sense is very lacking But if you just apply business that practices on common sense, you're gonna be really successful But if you treat people the way that you want to be treated You It's going to be treated like there's times when there's you can give it.

You should give a refund There's times when you know, if you don't deliver, does that make sense? Like if you don't deliver Then that person came into a contract to get that delivery. They want results and results you Promise to to get them to so that's the thing. I think [00:41:00] that just most people They're more wanting the money.

They're wanting the greedy part if they don't realize that it comes with a attachment of a service that they have to provide so I do something that I That I know a lot of people that I know who are entrepreneurs don't do Is in my inbox right now. I think I have five emails that i've read and i'm holding them back because I need to be reminded of them to take You Not to take care of them later, but because they're not ready to be done yet, but there's only 5, you know, they're red emails.

If there's any unread emails in my inbox right now, they have come in since. 11 o'clock this morning when I started doing meetings, right? So, and I will go in later and I will get rid of them. I will put the ones I need to into folders. And, you know, reply back to people who I [00:42:00] need to reply to and do the work that I need to do that are in some of them.

But, my email never has that little thing on it. That says 550, 000 emails on red because every email that comes in gets handled wherever it needs to go. After I've read it, so, I don't have that hanging because it was hanging over my head and I was missing things when I had a. So, let's let's take away hanging over your head.

Okay, we don't want to take that. So, here's the thing is a lot of the things that we use are actually like, kind of bad or negative for us, but like, hanging over your head. Let's don't just hanging overhead. Guess what that means. That means like, if it falls, it's going to crush you. We don't want that. It's sitting beside me.

It's sitting beside me. It's ready for me to handle rather than hanging over your head. So like, let's just, let's take that and just like, so another one of my mindset things, is just, [00:43:00] I like to be like a little kid. I like to just rip the piece of paper up, you know, wind it up in a piece, you know, a ball and just throw it in the trash can.

And so you won't believe like how great of a mindset trick that is for you. It's like, it just, When you see something you don't like, just think of it as mentally, like, just widen up that idea as a lighter piece of paper and it's still instructive.

One of the entrepreneurs I have a connection to because I know them I know that she says, her husband laughs at her all the time because she's always got, like, a bajillion emails waiting for her in her inbox. When I was ignoring my inbox and it was full of just everything I was missing things that I needed to do because it was getting buried by the things I didn't need to do.

So, I decided on my own to go into my email and take care of it [00:44:00] because I needed to be able to get those items that I needed to work on quickly. And that happens when you only have so many things in your inbox, right? It's not going to get missed that way. It's very difficult communications, that's the other thing, especially with business owners like communicate, but if you just I'm really big between making a difference between reason and excuse.

Okay. So if you call my phone, I don't get it or it doesn't ring and I don't get your message. That's a reason that something didn't happen. Okay. Okay An excuse is if you kept calling me and I didn't call you back So same thing is is like people who let their inbox full of business inquiries And they're like they're not prioritizing the things that's called an excuse And are they [00:45:00] prioritizing their business?

No, they're not. I mean, and so and i'm not saying you don't have to The other part is i'm not saying like you have to be business business business There's a point where you got to prioritize, make some time management stuff, and get to things in a timely manner. Here's the thing, I didn't get into entrepreneurship to just work 24 hours.

No one did. There's a lot of us that work a lot of long hours, but we, you know, we, we did it for the time freedom. We did it for, you know, our family, ourselves. Some of us like to eat a lot. Some of us like, you know, different things. That's the reason we're doing these things. We'd like to have a roof over our heads, things like that.

So I think that that's very important is when people struggle with doing the simple business task. [00:46:00] This is what am I prioritizing over? I can't prioritize the Netflix show. I can't prioritize like watching the, you know, A football game or a basketball game. Does that make sense? Like yeah You gotta you can take the time to do it You just have to make time to do the other stuff that's going to help your business.

As an entrepreneur yourself, Do you have? This says side hustles, but you know other you know, you have your main thing. Maybe that's coaching Do you have other things you're doing to keep money coming in in case the main thing? Nikki, I'm glad you said this because this is part of my story, you know, so I did network marketing for years because I had to, I had to have a team built around me to be able to do things.

And so I think the problem with people Is like they want to judge what someone else does. I feel like that's like a [00:47:00] it's a trash mindset It's a a thing where we don't know what other people are going through So it's really hard for us to be able to say. Oh, I don't like this person They shouldn't do this or like the other thing is is like I don't talk about doing sales.

I don't do sales I do service. But yeah, I know The other thing I was going to say is your network is your true network You Like, man, my network is insane. You would be so surprised at the names that are in my list and who I'm one person away from knowing, you know, I'm one person for Donald Trump. I'm one person from Michael Jordan.

I'm one person from all these big names. Cause I've known these people and I've built those relationships. So as I'm growing this, getting ready so much. I'm following C3. I'm I've got these relationships already built to be able to magnify it. My reach so that [00:48:00] I think that's really important and you have to be consistent at doing something Like I was talking about earlier about the runner's mentality like left foot right foot like that's consistent movement So

for some people that's making one phone call a day That's either giving one business card out Like all these things are just consistent actions that grow on and grow on and they get people to bigger steps and so I want to really Yeah Challenge people out there to like find something that you can do every day, small steps to increase your visibility.

So I love automation. Okay. I love automation software. My friend owns an automation company, and when he showed me it, I was like, Oh, Nicky, my automation software is how I got my first speaking gig. [00:49:00] Everybody tells me that speaking is like such a really difficult struggle, right? I got my first speaking gig in three days.

I was saying, hey, you know, I see, I see myself as a speaker. Oh, like three days later, like someone actually reached out to me. there was someone else, like someone, sorry, someone else recommended me. My comment was right above a Facebook post that they had, that was in that Facebook post, that comment. So my comment was a little bit ahead of theirs, and they were like, Hey, yeah, ask him.

He just started speaking. He'd be really good speaker. He's got two tremendous stories. So visibility is the key. And so the more visible you are, the more people will know that you're out there doing what you're doing. So for me, I do automation. I love AI. I'm also connected to some two. Very, rare air people who are in the space.

But I'm always looking for like side hustles and that type of stuff. Because guess what? [00:50:00] I find that people who really need my support. Maybe no need to know some coaching some business coaching things. I'm not afraid to listen. I'm open-minded about business opportunities. That's what I was gonna say.

So far for me, the only side hustle I have is, well, I have a couple, but, my podcast is a side hustle at this point because that's where it's at. And I do affiliate. So, some of the programs that I use, when somebody asks for my opinion on something, I'm like, Hey. I have an affiliate link, but I wouldn't be using it if it didn't actually work and was good.

So here you go Right. Absolutely. I love affiliate stuff like affiliate stuff is really good and, there's a lot of companies that like do affiliate stuff. So also like, I won't tell you about a new program that I have, like, I haven't told anybody it's not been on any other podcast as far as, so I have a [00:51:00] relationship that started last year about this time.

And as I was talking to him about building my 501c3, I was trying to get someone in the credit space. And I remember that I was, I was introduced to some people and became pretty decent for as acquaintances. So I was like, Hey, I'm gonna reach out and see if they would be interested. And so the first people who like was like, Hey, I want to work with Dwayne Morton and this type of type of way where I get on podcasts and I'll talk about it is a a debt elimination company called Trident Financial.

So What they do is they're, they're not a big one size fits all, you know, like type consolidation company. They're actually going to look with you, their mom and pop. They're very small compared to other big companies, but it's not a one size fits all. They're actually going to give you the advice that you need to have to be able to make the decision [00:52:00] of like, whether this is for you or not.

So if you have 20 K worth of credit card debt, give them a phone call. I'll have the link. I'll give it to you, Nikki. We can drop it. But I feel like it's a way to help people because there's 60 percent of Americans right now that have over 20 K of credit card debt. And they don't understand that like, Those interest rates are going to smother you.

You're going to be in debt for a long time on those, like, You know, when you get a past 20K worth of credit card, it's like, Hey, if you can get a lifeline, most people would be like, yeah, I'd love to have a lifeline. And so they teach you how to do it. And then once you're done, they're going to help you repair your credit.

It's all built into the system. And so if anybody wants to To know more about it, Mikio dropped a link and, you know, we can either get on a phone call with me or with some of our guys and their company. So I just want to [00:53:00] share that. It's the first time I'll share it. I just thought, hey, this is a great place to share that.

And so, but I think financially, a lot of people really struggle, especially over the last ever since COVID. And things had to get work. So, so Nikki, most people would not have looked into like a side hustle or that type of stuff until COVID. No one cared because they were like, well, you know, I got this job I go to, and they were always balancing the security rather than the actual benefits of doing other stuff.

So I think that's really important. And so in this day and age, which we have that. Those type of things, especially the internet. It's incredible. And so the other thing is like I use automation and the reason I use automation is is when I was sick, I wish I would have had it because I would have been able to compete with the other people when I was doing different things, so just wanted to share [00:54:00] that I started my business Well, my business was started while I was braindead and I was helping, somebody I met who was like, oh, can you do this for me because I know how to use a computer and he's not the best at that.

He was always trying to give me things to do and, like, the smallest tasks would overwhelm me and take forever to get done. And then once I came back to my mind and I was able to do things, it kind of grew from there. And so my business has always been kind of one of those things that I did because it's It helps me in the way I need it to for my mental health like I need to stay out of my head and just keep helping other people get things done for them and it's helped me be able to live life, obviously, because I make at least a little bit of money at it.

Nikki, I was [00:55:00] gonna say is like I have a friend of mine who she has cerebral palsy, and she started using AI because she was able to actually have a voice. And she was pretty much mute, you know, most people wouldn't pay attention, pay a lot of attention to her because of the way the online space with AI, she was able to facilitate that voice that she didn't have.

And so I cannot tell you how many people who have had, some type of, I don't want to use the word disability, like I just don't want to use it. But like different challenges, and so what we're finding out is people who are autistic or they're, they're, they identify with something, they're able to be seen and heard in a different way because of AI, because different types of software, I think that's extremely, technology is such a beautiful thing for people like that, that actually have struggled or like they've been [00:56:00] limited.

Because of, like, a health or, you know, something like that, so I just wanted to kind of share that. I feel like with you, with your brain injury, I probably have met more people in the last year, year and a half, with people with brain injuries. So I have friends who had it for a very short period, and I've had friends who have been, have had it for, for a longer period, and it actually really had changed their life.

So my mother,

she was involved in a really bad car accident when I was. 18, 19 years old and, her brother run a car accident and my mom's middle capacity has not ever been the same. Like she's, I don't know, one of my inspirations of like, you know, when it gets into business type things. So I always worked in the back part of the business, like [00:57:00] the office manager stuff.

Like I helped like accountants, accounts pay, accounts payable, receivable, and did those types of things with her. I love math, so that was kind of part of it. But my mom, when she had that car accident, she's had to have a couple back surgery, the neck surgery, and so she's had these challenges, but her short term memory has always been something that's been a struggle.

And so in the last year and a half, I have been

reminded by great people like yourself that remind me about the situation that my mom was in, or my mom isn't, right? And so, It is not lost on me that other people face different things and have to go through a different challenge to get to whatever they're doing. And so I just wanted to share that.

But I also wanted to tell people, I am so mindful, [00:58:00] I listen, I hear you, and I don't know, maybe Nikki and me will get together, we'll try to figure out another way for my, for a 501c3 or something like that we can do to help, but

I think I need to build the financial part first, but I feel like that's maybe like a next step, but I want to be able to help people, that's the whole thing, and like, you just made me really think of like, hey, there's a part of a story about, you know, my mom had a brain injury and, you know, You know, through a car crash and like, there's so many auto accidents that happen all the time.

I actually have a friend of mine who's a really, kind of a really, really good friend of mine who had, you know, more of a short term brain injury, but like she had resources that, sorry. She has a resources that I, you know, most people don't have to and like the network. So maybe me and her, I would get together and figure out something to do for for everyone.

So, thank you for having me. [00:59:00] Thank you for the listeners for giving their time. I am building that program. I call it show up to win. And so I tell people I don't just show up. I show up to win. I'm showing up with intention of winning anything I do. I want to be, you know, I want to make a clear intention.

That like I'm showing up with intention like and that's not that's not bad. That's the other thing. It's not an arrogant or anything like that. It's just hey, like, when we do things, we should do things with the intention of getting whatever the things that we need or want. And so, I tell people all the time I practice like it's a championship game.

So the championship. So, I built the program, the program show to win the community. It's going to be like a live brand. It's gonna be something like Livestrong I believe. And I'm building that community. Keep me consistent, consistent. So if you would like to know more about it. It's not [01:00:00] officially launched, I believe I wanna launch on February 1st.

But you can go up to go to show Up to Win I nfo. Now the, it's not to, it's the number two. So show up the number two win I nfo and go in there and put your information in. You know, it'll just not, it'll notify you when the site goes locked. And so I'm, I'm really hoping, praying to get this thing up February 1st.

And there, you don't have to put your phone number in, but if you put your phone number in, there's probably a reason, probably a really good thing. I'm probably going to reach out to everyone and give them a call and just find out how, how and why they want to go to this program. And so that's, and then also like, I have automation tools that, for business, that most people feel like automation is probably too [01:01:00] costly for them.

So I, you know, we can, you can get my info through Niki. And, you know, I'll tell you a little bit more about how I might be able to automate their business or show how to use AI. And, thanks for everybody to tune in and, thanks again for being such a gracious host and asking me wonderful questions.