Chiropractic Meets Mental Health: Real Talk on Pain, Triggers & Personal Growth

In this episode of Operational Harmony: Balancing Business & Mental Well-being, Nikki sits down with Sheetal, a chiropractor from New Zealand whose passion extends far beyond physical health. With a deep understanding of how mental and emotional experiences are stored in the body, Sheetal shares how our posture, pain patterns, and physical ailments are often rooted in childhood experiences, trauma responses, and nervous system regulation. This powerful conversation dives into how stress, PTSD, and everyday emotional responses can affect our physical state—and how reconnecting with safety in our bodies can create space for healing, confidence, and even business clarity. Sheetal also opens up about her evolving projects and her goal to help people integrate mindset and mental wellness into daily life. This is a must-watch for anyone curious about the mind-body connection, stress management, and finding resilience in the face of adversity.

[00:00:00] My name is, Sheetal I am a chiropractor, based in New Zealand. I am. Really excited to be on this with Nikki. 'cause I see how you put business and mental health together to really help people. What was the word you used on your website? I was looking through it. I really like that. So I'm excited to be on here.

The way I practice as a chiropractor myself is, actually really understanding what, integrating the idea of how our mental and emotional health actually wires us. And because of how that wires us, it begins to, impact the way we shape our body. Like, for example, we e everyone knows, and for those who are hearing this, not watching a video, we all know that when we are feeling sad or someone talks about a victim, they'll talk about, you're rolling your shoulders forward and feeling, that's just one basic example of how.

That shapes our body and vice versa. We're feeling confident we've got our chest outs, or even if you're pretending to be confident, you'll have our chest outs standing [00:01:00] tall. And that makes you feel better. And that's just one example of how mental emotional health can impact the physical body. And when I started working more with people, I began to realize how people's stories, their past history began to do that.

And so then I began that actually, made me more passionate about it. And so now I have my Instagram page as well shine where I, speak a lot about like mindset and mental health and have a few more little baby, project babies, business babies coming out soon in the future just regarding this, because I've become quite passionate about that.

But yeah, that's me. Yeah, and what I actually began to realize is that. When it comes to some people's personalities or confidence levels and doing the things they want to do, it really gets impacted by, we all know, like our, the way we were brought up might be impacting who we are, but actually goes deeper than that.

The things that we saw when we were kids, like it's just [00:02:00] small things of, how we saw our parents, react to stress or how they, not so much what they told us they do, but what they would do. And it is seeing the people around us, whether it was our teachers and I don't know if you guys call it kindergarten, there we call kindergarten, people go, like preschool kind of time.

What they would've done, how they would've taught us things and what our parents, because we obviously looked up to our parents, how they would've reacted to us doing something that could be stressful, like crying in the supermarket or touching some, touching a hot surface. Seeing that we would learn how to respond or how to react to now when we are adults, we, our, anxiety levels, our confidence in ourselves, our ability to feel safe in our body, will begin to as, as complete reflection of what we saw as little kids, as like four or 5-year-old kids.

And when it comes to like, okay, I've got these, this rate to pay or this business, these little projects to do, how we deal with it comes from that. [00:03:00] And yeah, so that's actually what I work with. So as a chiropractor, when I'm actually working with people, they'll come in for pain and they'll be like, I've got, and of course I'll do the typical chiropractic work with adjustments, which adjustments is what we call our chiropractic treatment.

So we're doing the adjustments. But along with that, the more I get to know them and depending on how open the person is to speaking, I begin to be like, what have you, not with these exact words. Somewhere along these lines, depending on what the person shares with me, what have you gone through?

Are you the oldest child? Are you middle, are you, do you have the middle child syndrome? Or like the youngest child? And based on that, they might have been the most responsible one or they might have had neglected. And that obviously just from that young age start to shape how your personality and how you hold your body.

And then that is what makes people vulnerable to certain, because of the posture and the way they hold their selves makes them more vulnerable to certain injuries or areas of pain in the body as well. Obviously there's other [00:04:00] factors, like it could be oiling disease or whatever, but that is a huge factor and that's how side diving into, mental health.

And I know you told me that you see a chiropractor as well. Hmm, yep. I see a chiropractor every week because I have arthritis and my body dislikes me,

dislikes me. Interesting, interesting way of saying it. I usually say hate, but everybody's like, oh, you have to be more mindful. No, my body, like I can do something twice. The first time. Nothing happens the second time. Like I am, I might have to go to the chiropractor for the second time in a week. And that like, why is this happening here?

So what do you mean the first time? Nothing happens. Um, so, okay, so there's a couple of kids here that aren't normally here. They are temporarily here. [00:05:00] And the 2-year-old, I can lean down and pick her up. I. Two, three times in a day, she like weighs next to nothing. A little itty bitty little thing. And the first time I picked her up, almost flung her into the ceiling because I wasn't expecting,

like you expect babies to have at least a little bit of weight. I mean, to 2-year-old, they have weight to them. I could pick her up some days and it's perfectly normal. There's no, like, my body doesn't like react in any way, but then I can do it again.

Same way I've done it every single time. Maybe not even in the same day. Maybe it's the first time I do it in the next day and all of a sudden I'm like, oh, okay. So I'm not gonna be able to do anything for the rest of the week because now my shoulder is pinched somewhere and it hurts. Like, right. So it's kind of like, is my body gonna react to it every single time?

No. They're gonna randomly decide to have a hissy fit because I did something. Heck [00:06:00] yes. So, yeah, it's just wow. And shoulder. Sorry, carry on. So I just, I literally will walk into the room with the chiropractor and he's like, okay, what's up? And I go, okay, this shoulder is really tight. My spine hurts in the middle of my ribs, and my right hip is out again.

It's like the pain is radiating everywhere. And he just goes, you are talking about your right hip this time, right? And I'm like, yes, it's still the right hip. And he's like, okay, let's go. And we go through and he makes it better. So I. So is it always the right hip, the shoulder, like always the same thing?

The right shoulder and the right hip are, have been a constant for like the last two years. Mm. Every once in a while it decides to confuse the crap out of both of us. And my left hip will decide to do something and I walk in and I go, I got [00:07:00] news. And he's like, what's that? I'm like, my left hip hurts, but my right hip seems fine.

He just kind of looks at me like, wait, what did you do? And I'm like, know I woke up.

And that's actually, you know, I find that funny 'cause so many times he books, she'd come to me and they'll be like, oh, my left ankle or left, whatever. One side is sore. But it's the other side that can often feel quite stuck with movement and that's because of the way the body compensates a lot. So yeah, that makes sense.

Why once a random while you get news of the left side. Have you ever heard about, how the brain has, like the, some people talk about the human body of one side saw and the other side saw and talk about masculine feminine traits, and I've kind of looked into that and they talk about, okay, the brain, you know, how there's like a more artsy side and a more intellectual sciencey side.

So some say, and I [00:08:00] haven't really dived fully deep into this, but I have noticed a pattern where the clients, I see that when there's like one side of pain, then that could be, that has to do with one side of, if you constantly have one side of pain that can have to do with the masculine feminine trait, which translates to, the artsy or the scientific side of the brain and how that impacts your body.

So yeah, it's quite interesting how that happens and how that develops into manifesting in the body. Yeah, my therapists talk a lot about the wizard brain, you know, that part that the input

or whatever that's called in the back of the head that, but it's that part that is what makes it so, like for me, I can't have people just walk behind me.

And then, it's that automatic response of fear when you see somebody with brown hair [00:09:00] or, going into a building and you're not sure how to get out of it again, except for by this one door, you've just come in. Some people just react.

It's the react. It's the. Automatic reaction to something without actually thinking of it. That's where all that stuff is. And it's what causes, people with mental illnesses to freak out. That's where the panic attack starts. You feel it in your heart and everywhere else you're not feeling it in the back of your head.

That's not what I mean. But that's where it starts. That's where that's the one that goes, okay, adrenaline come online. We got something to fear. There's something happening. We don't know what it is yet, but we're gonna fight to the death right now so that we survive it. And so it creates those responses.

Yeah. And the lizard part of the brain at all, like screw off. But it's the survival part of the brain, right? It's made to survive it, it's made to help you survive and you're so right there. And that's [00:10:00] actually, I'm glad you see that because that relates exactly to what I was saying in a different way earlier on.

When I was saying people come in and we talk about pain and stuff and how it shapes the body, and I was using it from like a postural kind of example. But yeah, it starts in the brain from what it like the way your body's okay, let's the way the brain has learned to pick up signals of throat or fear.

And I think part of it could be the more we were exposed to as a kid without having, with feeling safe, without having the threats. Like the more we're exposed to in a safe environment, the more we probably the least, we probably get freaked out and have, even low key panic attacks. I'm not talking like full on panic attacks, but even we'll have less low key crap moments.

Yeah. And then that begins to change the state of the body and then that creates people's. Symptoms of like anxiety, low self-esteem. I've worked with so many people actually, in fact, [00:11:00] and now I don't know why, keep attracting these people or maybe I've just be begin to realize that is what's, underlying all the stuff.

And there's people who are, from the lizard brain or the your brain where your body, your brain's constantly in a state of oh threat. There's a threat. There's a threat. Is there something around the corner? Is that car bumper to me? Is that person actually a killer? Like, people like constantly have these thoughts.

You are in, you are constantly sending signals down to your heart, to start racing your pupil's big walking up. Yeah. And you are sweating. 'cause your body's ah, so what does that mean, your nervous system? The system that, like the body system that, actually controls the whole thing.

It's in that alert state and most humans are in that state. Being in that fight or flight, state, fight, flight, frights and freeze or fall. And they're not all bad. It's, you need, if you are driving the car and all of a sudden a car pulls in front of you to push the brakes instantly, quickly, [00:12:00] or, back in the old example, or say with tooth tiger chasing you, obviously you need to be in that run goal.

But most people are in that state constantly and that is. What actually begins to create our bodies. I am unsafeness and I need to create safety. And I can either, because they're constantly in that repeated space, whether it's from childhood or whether it's now from like adult life. The body begins to be like, okay, I don't deserve to be, safe.

Which means I wanna constantly, it's either I don't deserve to, I'm not worthy of, or I just don't know what to trust and how to trust. And it's like deeper belief systems, right? It's not like you're constantly saying it's subconscious belief system. Mm-hmm. What's happening on a neurological, biomechanical and that kind of level.

It's like your body, your brain's constantly sending signals of be aware, be an alert, what's happening. And that begins to change all the things I spoke about, which means how in the world is your body going to be [00:13:00] at peace, at ease? Obviously with all these things happening now you are releasing, like you said, the adrenaline and the adrenal, glands are gonna releasing the stress hormones.

Cortisol, hello, inflammation. Why does everyone have so many inflammatory kind of things these days? Like they're starting to people, like, I'm not a specialist in that, in the nutrition or gut or all the different things they talk about, but. So much risk is coming out now and they say inflammation is causing this.

And it's not necessarily just the food you're eating, it's the state of your brain and your body, like your body's in alerts all the time. So because of that, people's pain and all these things begin to happen. And I actually find it interesting how you just brought that up today because just last night I was speaking to my dad and I was like, man, I find it interesting.

I find it kind of challenging sometimes in practice, to speak to people and tell them your pain. Yeah. You might have disc bulging or yeah, you might have some degeneration [00:14:00] happening or arthritis for some people. Right. But while I've worked on their joints and everything, I've realized they've also told me a history of things that's happened and made me, their parents had some similar pain.

I've told me things and I'm like, I find it ha challenging in the beginning to actually be like, Hey. Do you think maybe the pain might, be also from other factors? Because, pain is a neurological symptom, so you don't Yeah, joints can be tense, joints can be a, thing weird.

But not everyone who've had a fracture or have had any kind of thing. I actually have a chart in front of me right now that talks about asymptomatic things like this degeneration, disc height loss, disc bulge, disc protrusion, joint degeneration, all the different things and how they show up asymptomatic.

And if you do a x-ray or scan, you're like, oh, you have these things but you don't have the pain because the pain actually comes from the brain and the level of pain signals the nerves going to the nerve receptors feel is based on how [00:15:00] stressed the body feels or how safe the body feels. If your body's in a threat zone or in a frightful zone constantly because of the heart and everything.

The pain levels are gonna be a lot higher versus someone who the boy's like, Hey, something's up, but you're feeling safe, you're feeling healthy, you're regulated constantly, and you're feeling good. Then the boy's, okay, something's not right. There's a bit of alertness versus out 10 out, 12 out of 10 paid.

 That's the difference that we've, began to realize. And where was I gonna go with that? When I was gonna speak about, oh, I lost track of what I was gonna say with that. Oh, yes. I've realized with this is, I see only sometimes I find it challenging and that's actually just me.

And so I know you, do a bit of like business, respect to business owners as well. And why I wanna bring this part in here is from like the aspect of being confident in yourself and what you believe or what you wanna say. That's just me thinking they won't [00:16:00] understand me or they'll think I'm talking some woo woo or something, because I'm like, oh, not everyone knows it's in the word because everyone's just like X-ray, knee inflamed.

That's where you've got pain. But then when I go to actually explain them using the language they might like, I'm like, you know what? This is the truth because there's so much research out there about this. I'll use the technology they might understand and be like, oh yeah, they're on board.

So I just thought add this on there when you're speaking about kind of mixing the idea of your own confidence with what you're saying and when you're delivering the things to whatever you're saying to a client, whether it's a package or it's a educating them or selling something, yeah. Is definitely a factor.

And just being confident what you're saying. Yeah. But I wanted to ask you, have you noticed that for yourself when you are maybe more stressed, the pain levels are higher? Yeah. So it depends. I'm gonna put it [00:17:00] this way. So yeah, if I'm stressed because of work, my neck will go, my neck gets horribly bad when I'm stressed from work and then the migraines start, it's a whole thing.

But if I'm stressed, because I am remembering from having the nightmares and all that good stuff that comes from having PTSD and C-P-T-S-D, then the pain, that's more down my spine type thing and includes my hip and stuff. So it's just different for the different ways that I'm doing it because when I am,

stress from work. I'm doing this a lot 'cause I'm going from one screen to the other and it goes off and it's fine. I get adjusted and I'm back to normal and I can keep going. But when I'm stressed about history, then it's, I'm clenching down my body because that's when I'm more jumpy.

That's when, I'm [00:18:00] not completely in control of my thoughts because, you know, the movies start playing and I don't particularly like them. Mm-hmm. So, you know, that kind of stuff where I'm more stiff all the time, that carries right down my spine and my hips tend to wobble. Wow. Yeah. You have great awareness of your body.

I love that. It's kind of been forced on me, but yeah,

I didn't have a choice. Do you, how, what do you do to choose, I'm just gonna ask you like, what do you do to choose to, do you have a strategy that you use for changing your story, or your movie that you're playing? So the big thing for me is I have trouble falling asleep. I take sleeping pills, but it still takes, I'm on some strong ones.

Okay. Like, we're not talking about wimpy, we're talking about good ones or tranquilizers almost. But it still takes time for them to take [00:19:00] effect. Really wish I could find one that like, did it and then kept me asleep. 'cause that, those are my two problems. I cannot fall asleep and I cannot stay asleep.

It's a big thing for me, but. When I am laying down and I'm trying to go to sleep, that's when you know I'm not doing something right. Because I can't be like on the computer if I'm trying to sleep, you know, I can't be reading. Yeah. If I'm trying to sleep, that's not how it works. You have to lay there. And so for me, the only thing, that time is when I'm the most vulnerable because I have to keep my mind busy in order to not go into the black hole that is back there somewhere.

Mm-hmm. And so for me, like when I lay down to go to sleep, I have an exercise that I do and it kind of sounds stupid and woo woo, but it's not. It works and it distracts me enough that I can fall asleep and be fine, but like I play through my mind. So let's say tomorrow you woke up and you [00:20:00] had way more money than you ever planned to have in your life.

Like this was not part of the plan. You didn't like win the lottery, but you just come into a big, huge amount of money randomly. What are your first steps? What do you have to do? And then like I walk myself through all of, like, I'm never gonna get that. Not saying never, but like, probably not gonna be in the cards for me.

Right. Like, I'm not just magically gonna have a cream puff worth of money in my hands. Right. But by doing that, you have to concentrate. Like what is the first step? Well, the first step is you have to get lawyers and accountants and, and investment people, because I'm not keeping all of that in my, you know, in a tin can under my bed.

That's like a work, right? So, yeah. Yeah. You kind of, you start going through the smart ways of what you're gonna do. I'm gonna have a house, I'm gonna have a maid because I'm not cleaning that house. Right. [00:21:00] You know, those kind of things to try to walk through it. And before I'm even five or six steps and I'm usually asleep.

Wow. Mind to shut up enough that it's only concentrating on those things. And then the medicine comes in, he goes, go away. Go sleep now. Yeah. That's amazing. And no, that's not, woo, what's happening there is, and I'm from pretty sure you understand that is, and I think Tony Roman speaks a lot about this.

Like what you focus on is your life is a, what do you call it? Life is a something basically life is what you focus on. And so that's exactly what you're doing there. 'cause you've, rather than your default right now, is thinking about we spoke about wiring and your default right now is all the black hole, everything that's happened, the ptsd.

And it's just a conscious, it's a very conscious. Action to think of something that's a lot more pleasant in your body, obviously, like if everyone listening right now just thinks of one thing that stresses them out, just tap into how your [00:22:00] chest feels and how your shoulders, when you feel a bit tighter to maybe your stomach, like anything that feel, feels stressing you out, whether it's your kids, if you think about like something happening to kids or your partner or your loved ones or your list of things to do, or your things to pay off whatever, and now how can you feel relaxed in that state?

Like thinking of that your body's not gonna be relaxing at all. So from there, going on to thinking about a, something that makes you so happy and for example, like Nikki does, she thinks about getting lots of like, what if you woke up next morning so much money, like you just didn't expect it and you got so much money.

What is that associating with? It's probably associating money with something really pleasant and something that she absolutely loves. It's going to probably answer a lot of problems for her, solve all problems for her, give her a lot of happiness, and somebody's like, huh, add ease. And so we are thinking about, even though there's a lot of actions to do that, 'cause we are talking about like [00:23:00] the broker and like things like, Ooh, that sounds like a lot of work to do, but your brain was associating that with like, obviously 'cause I don't know your history, but obviously compared to the black hole, that feels like a great list of things to do.

So your brain's like, okay, cool. And I don't think all of it is because, okay. Because a lot of people wouldn't think, okay, you gotta have a lawyer, gotta have this, gotta have that. But with my family history, I have to protect what I've just been given. Right. There are forces at work that would not like me to be that far ahead.

And so, I would have to protect it. So that's why my immediate first thought is, okay, obviously I need a lawyer 'cause somebody's gonna try to come at me in some way and I'm not having that. He's just gonna have to deal with it. I ain't dealing with it. And then an account. I hate doing accounting, hate doing the budget.

I hate numbers. I don't [00:24:00] like them. I was in special ed from second grade until eighth grade. And so I can do addition and subtraction. Not a big deal. But when I went into special ed, it was just addition and subtraction. And then while I was in it, I did do multiplication and division, but they didn't make me memorize multiplication like most people do.

And I have gaps in my education because we moved a lot that creates holes. Wow. I was to like 20 different elementary schools. So like that sounds 20. Yeah. That gives you gaps in your education that you have, you know, that takes time to come back from, well, by the time we settled down, I was in high school, you know, or middle school and then into high school, and so, but there was no recovering math.

I recovered in a lot of other ways. Like I can read at college level, I can comprehend at college level. I'm very, I'm not saying I'm super genius, but I'm not stupid either. [00:25:00] I am smart, but if you put math in front of me, I look like the stupidest person ever. I had somebody do an IQ on me one time, like the real standardized test that they do for an iq and right up until I was doing the math portion, I'm, he was like.

Test higher than me on this. Like he has a better IQ than I do. And then I hit math and my score tanks. But it is because I went from addition, a subtraction, simple sub, multiplication in division, not even long form or any of that. And then in eighth grade, when I got taken outta special ed, because I was now reading and comprehending at a higher level, I don't know how that turns into, okay, she can do math now.

They put me in a math class that had the alphabet in it. I walked into that room the first time and I was like, [00:26:00] what is the alphabet doing in here? No, no, no, no, no.

This is not acceptable. So I mean I did pass eighth grade coming out halfway through the year in, out, out of special ed. And I had a guidance counselor walk up to me a couple weeks afterwards and I was feeling stressed because it was like I went from needing to do like this much schoolwork, you know, some very little amount.

And all of a sudden my schoolwork was up here because now it was in normal, all normal classes. And so the guidance counselor was like, oh, don't worry about it. We totally expect you to be here again next year. What? So I kind of went, I don't particularly like that you said that, and screw you. I will not be here next year.

I would've been on the honor roll my final semester, but I had a D in math [00:27:00] and you can't be on the honor roll with a D in math. I had the grade point average. That'll tell you something. I had the grade point average to be on the honor roll, but math sucks. So the whole math port, the whole, like even thinking of a large number, like slowly, if I concentrate on the amount of money it takes to do any of the stuff I'm doing, then my brain just fogs up and I can't, like panic, attack, start and all that, it's just stupid.

But like, my brain can't think when I get stressed over numbers. So I don't think about it in terms of numbers of how much it's gonna cost. I'm just like, okay, the big things I, I have to do is buy a house and a car, right? Because those are two things that I would need. But then after that it's simply, okay, well we want this in there, we want this in there.

It's not, oh, well I'm gonna spend 1,000 thousand dollars on a car because [00:28:00] why would I, I'm gonna go get a good car, right? So I'm not gonna go get a, I don't know what the big name brands are anymore, but like, some huge costing thing that is just still a car, not getting a Ferrari or anything.

Yeah, no, that would terrify me actually, because I know how to drive and I can drive, but I can put pedal down too far sometimes. You do not want me in a Ferrari. Oh gosh, yeah, that pedal. Yeah. I'd get in trouble for that. So let's not do that to me. But I just want like a normal thing. So it's not that I'm saying, okay, well I'm gonna spend at least this much on this.

I don't know the prices of anything anyway. Why would I, I've not gone shopping for a brand new car ever before. So. I know the price of that. So it's just, this is what I want. This is the color I wanted in because like I know somebody, in Maryland where I used to live [00:29:00] who went to a dealership after hers, she got in an accident to get a new car and the only one they would approve for her is this baby puke green.

And I was just like, I'm so sorry that you're stuck with an ugly car. Baby pew, my car will be a color I actually like 'cause no. And then Fair enough. Yeah. So just kind of that type stuff so that I can, fully start to distract the rest of my brain into thinking only about that topic.

Like you don't even have to do it about getting a whole bunch of money and then thinking out every single step. But you want to be distracting yourself. So you don't want it to be about your schedule tomorrow. That's not gonna distract you. That's gonna make you have more stress. Exactly. Right. Exactly.

So maybe you think about your kid graduating from high school or college, maybe they're the first one in your family that's ever done it. So you know, you're thinking about all the [00:30:00] steps you have to do for them to be able to get to that point and walk that stage. Or, something that if you threw it out there you'd be completely aesthetic, whatever, super duper happy if you could do it.

But there are steps that you have to do in order to get to the end. And so you start specifically talking, thinking about those steps so that your brain has something to latch onto. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Exactly. Distracting your brain from the black hole is necessary. 'cause you get sucked into that. You can't get out of bed for a day or two or three or however many, right?

So it's kind of helped me stay out of that and come out of that. So, I don't know. I'm weird though, so I don't know if it's gonna work for everybody, but it's just kind of what I do, which is why I say it's woo. It's not, it's so, you're not weird, first of all. I mean, we're [00:31:00] all weird. We are all weird in our own ways.

So that makes you not weirdly weird, but, your strategy is what works for everyone. Just not just thinking you're going to just stop maybe thinking about. The lawyers and all the different things. Because I personally think, well, if I got a lot of money, I'm gonna think about that. If I got a lot money, I'd be like, okay, I'm gonna give something to my parents and to this place and to this place, and then the rest for me.

Make sure the business, put more into my business for that too, and grow and trouble. Yeah. Great. Mm-hmm. That would be my thinking. Not really, but see, like what you're doing, the, the keeping the brain busy. 'cause the brain is, it's not like your brain's ever gonna shut up. Like, and not until you're dead.

Like it's always gonna be working. Mm-hmm. But you are just con you are choosing very consciously to think about something else because you are gonna put your body into a state of stress or a state of happiness or bliss or fear or anxiety or lack of confidence or whatever, based on your thoughts, like what's constantly [00:32:00] happening in the brain.

So. It's just a matter of this is default system, like a computer has a default system or are you going to put new software in there? And that is you consciously choosing, Hey stop. We're thinking about that. We're thinking about this now. And so yeah, that works. That really works. But really thinking about it and feeling into it is what really acts.

So for people who like constantly feel like they're lacking. Confidence or they get anxious quite quickly. This is a beautiful thing to actually change because there is no one truth, right? People say fake it till you make it, or there's no one truth. And what that basically means is there's so many sides to a story.

It's not just like a coin, two sides. It's so many sides to a story. So like, one person can look a situation and there's, sorry, 10 people can look a situation and they'll say 10 different things. So just choosing what truth you wanna take from it. I'm gonna step up on stage right now and speak about something.

Okay? That's freaking me out. First of all, wait, I'm gonna take a step back. First of all, it's important to [00:33:00] acknowledge it and what you're already doing. You're already acknowledging that you've got, PD and stuff. So before everyone else, take a step back and be like, okay, what am I feeling?

Not just, I hate this because obviously that's you running away from it. What is it that you hating? Are you feeling scared? Are you feeling. Traumatizing feeling and threats and what could, you don't have to, you don't have to do a whole therapy session on yourself, but just the whole point of acknowledging it is so that you can become friends with it.

Because like we spoke about right in the beginning of this whole talk is the, the lizard brain and that brain is made there to keep you and, it's made there to protect you there. So you are, you're not going to be jumping into fire without the right gear, like you are protected. So thank you brain for telling me that I could slip up when I'm on the stage or thank you brain for saying I could forget things.

But that's only a. Possibility. There's also the possibility that I'm going [00:34:00] to be rocking it. I'm going sell the product. I'm going to influence people. Whatever your goal is, I'm going to say things and if I do slip, I can make that part of a story. If I do forget what I'm saying, I can say, oh, I forgot what I was gonna say.

Let me look at my notes. 'cause I do have notes or I do have this PowerPoint, or I can just skip that and see people tell people. Hmm. And I do that personally. Hmm. I forgot what I was gonna say there. I'm gonna come back to that if I remember and if I didn't have notes, because sometimes I think I'm cool and I won't have to need, I won't need the notes.

We all forget things. We all get a bit of like, oh, stage fright sometimes. So yeah, that is really important. So acknowledging, becoming friends with it and then like, 'cause it, the fear is part of a protection response for your body, or anxiety is part of that as well. But it doesn't have to override you, it doesn't have to overrule you.

And once you've done that, you can like, okay, I wanna focus on the other side of it. Let that be the ruler. Like, all these things can exist. Actually, you know what, just jumping [00:35:00] before jumping on the, podcast, I was actually doing a story on this on my Instagram about how so many truths can exist in what we're feeling and experiencing.

So you can feel anxious, you can feel happy, you can feel nervous if you feel, excited and feel at ease. And so in the situation, what we spoke about was going on stage or some, whatever it might be. You could be feeling anxious, you could be feeling freaking nervous, and there can be so many of those kind of feelings.

But you can choose to focus on, become friends with that, and then focus on mo, mainly on the, on the idea of like whatever your wire is. For some people they're like, I really gonna make some money here. For some people it's, I wanna make an impact here. Or some people it's I just wanna step outside my comfort zone.

That is a big enough why for them. Great. Focus on that. And then so when it comes to the sleeping situation of, or socializing situation, why are you there? Or why, or I need to get rest because I wanna make sure I, this doesn't really work for people with a sleeping one for [00:36:00] so many people. Just, it's not like the biggest why.

'cause if you have a issue going to sleep, you wouldn't be like, you wouldn't even have an issue going to sleep in the first place if this was a big pull. I need to get to sleep because I wanna get X, y, z done tomorrow. No. So yeah, that's why I said don't concentrate on the schedule for tomorrow, because that Yeah.

Worse. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. No, that is a huge thing. Sorry. Go. For me, if I'm nervous about what's gonna happen tomorrow morning, if I have a super important 9:00 AM meeting, I'm not sleeping the night before. And it's not because I don't want to, is I can't, I literally can't. I could take my sleeping pills and still stay awake because I'm like, I have to make sure that every moment is gonna be right.

I have to think about every single, like it's, I have my days, but, so asleep for me is one of those things where sometimes my body just kind of goes, yeah, we're not doing that. [00:37:00] And I have no say. I can lay there and go completely through everything I can think of on my list of things to do, and still it's just like, ha ha, I'm not doing that today.

But. So it's not even, consistency. So if you do that enough, as soon as you start thinking about it, like you'll get to like maybe the second or third step and you'll fall asleep on good nights. Yeah. Yeah. If it's good, if it's a bad night, you have to acknowledge it. 'cause sometimes you're gonna have a bad night, even if you're doing wonderful, even if you don't feel like there's any stress there for you to be worried about.

Sometimes your brain is just like happily in that dark void and there was nothing you did to put it there, but it doesn't mean you're gonna be able to get sleep or whatever it is you were hoping to do, done. Right. And it's just accepting that. Yeah. And accepting that because of course there's ways to work through things and it's a long term.

It's a [00:38:00] long process to eventually get there. There's so many, when I say this, it's not to say. The point is to acknowledge your, where you're at right now. Mm-hmm. Yep. It's a journey and I only say that of course things can get better because I know there are so many multiple ways in the world to quote unquote for like later to fix something, right?

But it's just what way works for the body. We might not have seen that right now. Maybe it's a journey approach to unwind or go through. So acknowledging that, because if you are like, damn, this is a crack night, and you just sit there in that and you're not actually accepting it. Then it's just gonna make you stress more.

And that's probably body more into stress, more into low turmoil, more into everything you spoke about your, tomorrow you're gonna be sweating and probably have some gut issues and probably have like more a heart rate high and everything like Yeah. So accepting it makes it that tiny bit or 50% better even maybe.

Mm-hmm. So, [00:39:00] yeah. Yeah. The key to most things, whether it's mental health or business, that I have found the biggest key, the biggest thing that will unlock the secrets of the universe is identifying whatever it's so, mm-hmm. You have to identify, okay, I'm having a bad night. That doesn't mean you're a bad person, it doesn't mean you are whatever happened.

It just means you are having a bad night. This happened even in normal people, normal-ish. 'cause I don't know that normal is a thing, people, you know, you look at some people and you're like, they have their life together. I'm telling you, they have had bad nights. Have had, you know, even Tony Robinson, like you mentioned before, you know, they're guaranteed.

He had something, you know, he had a bad day, he had something fall through that he was looking forward to happening. Guaranteed. A hundred percent know I'm talking truth and I don't know the guy, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah, because that happens, whether it's business or life, it [00:40:00] happens. And so identifying where it came, you know, where you know that it is there and saying, okay, I'm having a bad night, and then making a choice, because that's the other part of it.

You can identify the crap out of it and just be like, yeah, this is a bad night. This is a bad night. Well, I can't do anything about it. It's a bad, no, you can do something about it. Go. If you're trying to go to sleep and you just can't because it's a bad night, go do something for an hour and come back to bed and try again.

Walk away, go take a, I'm not saying go take a walk 'cause I don't know how safe your neighborhood is at midnight, but you do you

like walk around, you know, walk in circles in the living room? I don't know. Those types of things. I don't know what you can do. Go back to your computer and play a game. Go find, there's games that you can play that aren't hard. Like, I'm not saying you have to go play wow for an [00:41:00] hour. Go find solitaire.

That'll make you mad. That might make it more easy to fall asleep. I know. I'm pissed off. You know, I get mad enough, I'll be like, okay, well I can't do this anymore. And I go pick something else I go read. That's a little dangerous. Just as a caveat, it's very dangerous to say, oh, I'm gonna go read. 'cause if you get it to a good part in that book, good luck putting that sucker down.

Can I add though? I would say if I get a good book, I would still fall asleep. For me, reading is like easy. I'm like, I'm gonna read this book so much, but it's the easiest way to fall asleep for me. And, you know, the tips of like gaming and stuff, in the ideal world, you don't wanna be walking at the screen, but if the, blue screen wakes you up, not great, stimulates the brain.

But in the world of the brain is really hyperactive, what works for you? If you want, you kind of chill, relax, get the brain to come down. [00:42:00] Ready to calm down. Oh, I feel like I'm saying the wrong thing there. But, put your mind to kind of relax. So the body to come into different states, to go away from that black hole that we, referred to earlier, then that could be something you look into.

But ideally what you definitely wanna do is find a way to get your body feeling safe. And that's actually how I even began realizing all this stuff is because, there's so much, we learned back in chiropractic college that doing adjustments regulates nervous system changes, the brain activity.

They've seen how the prefrontal cortex begins to open up. And the body, the way the body responds to stress changes. But the more I delve deeper into this, and now the more nervous system has become a topic, the training topic or TikTok in anything, I began to realize. As I worked with people and they're like, oh, I struggle to sleep.

If I, with adjustments to help bring up the nervous system right after that, sometimes I might get them to pop their hand on their chest and their belly or something. I'll work on if it's the right time telling them, like thinking of what makes them feel safe. Because if [00:43:00] I just say, Hey, say I am safe.

That's just saying something random that's, that doesn't really relate. Yeah, that's the rule. Rule. Yeah. But if thinking about what makes you feel safe and as they breathe, and it can be really hard before some, if I've worked with 'em, obviously they've created relationships with some people, it might be their husband, might be their childhood home, might be thinking of their.

Parent or grandparent that's passed away. But so obviously it becomes emotional for them, for some people. But then they tap into the feeling of feeling safe and then they breathe into the chest. Because when we as humans, when we like hug someone, if you are a hugging person, as kids though, we, that's how we did feel safe.

So holding your own chest and just breathing into that area, allowing the, allowing your breath to kind of go through the chest. Why say through the chest, is because so many humans now just breathe in the shoulder and chest area rather than going all the way down, which is the body's way of being in a stressful state.

Because when you are running, you breathe up, up here in the chest, you're not running, breathing into the abdomen versus when you're [00:44:00] relaxed, your body's completely in a parasympathetic stage, should be able to breathe into the core. But yeah, feel thinking about what helps them feel safe and then if they want to either them choose what they wanna say as like a remembrance because.

We need an anchor. Like when we go to certain places, anchors help us remember, get, tap into certain feeling and emotion. So if they want to use, a certain statement, then at that time, I feel safe. Then if they wanna say that, because that's like an anchor so that they can use that when they are going to sleep.

That works. But it takes a bit of work and you need to get the body in a regulated space to then come find that safe memory, then tell your body, okay, we are safe and this is what it feels like to feel safe. And that's why the brains like, okay, I can sleep rather than think about all the things that it needs to get done.

All the things from the past. 'cause that is associating it with unsafety. Like your heart rains and your brain's gonna be active. So yeah. safety is huge in the body [00:45:00] and brain. Oh yeah. I'll tell people that I have a huge need to feel safe, so please don't touch me. when we first moved. Into, ward, I was, the ward is a church building, but my hair, I usually always have it in my braids because my hair is down to my waist.

It is way better and way easier to manage when it's in the braids. Of course, my braids, but sometimes on Sunday because I have migraines, I can't get my hair braided because it's, my head hurts too much. You're pulling on my hair 'cause I might elbow you type deal, because of the pain. So I wore my hair down one Sunday and somebody sitting behind me decided that was a great time, put their hands on me.

I had, I locked myself in so I didn't like. Try to hit backwards or anything. But, I was stiff as a board the whole [00:46:00] time she had her hands on me because I actually thought it was her very, very old husband that had their hands on me. It took me a full minute to realize it was a female and that I was okay instead of it being the guy, which I would've probably gone, Chucky on.

Just because I have my issues. But, so my friend who was there after I'd been touched, I like leaned on her for a second because I can make the choice to touch other people, and I know that she's fine with me doing that if I absolutely need to. But at the same time, I didn't ask nor want that touch, like it wasn't welcome.

Mm-hmm. And so I've had a lot of that in my life where people are just like, oh, I get to touch you. Especially with long hair, people are always like, oh, I could touch your hair. Oh, that's not here. How'd you grow that? Yeah. Yeah. You get pregnant. Everybody expects to be able to touch, you know, rub your belly like you're the Buddha.

[00:47:00] I don't know you like people walk up to you in a grocery store and start rubbing on your belly and I'm just like, the heck are you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh wow. That's weird. People actually. Just Random people. Yeah, random people. If you're pregnant, you can expect with random people to be like, you're bringing a beautiful life into the world.

It's so wonderful that you're pregnant. Like the whole time they're talking, they're rubbing your belly and oh my gosh. Amazed. I didn't go to jail. I dunno, people, I've seen people do their hair bit when people see long hair. Well, I've got long hair. How do you do that? Like, I've seen that, but the belly, that's so, I feel like that's so, intimate, like that's really on.

Wow. Yeah. And that you are also touching the baby. Have you asked the baby permission by doing that? Oh, I mean, and then, the baby comes out and you're, and then you tell kids, [00:48:00] if you ever think about it, we tell kids that they shouldn't allow touches from strangers, right? Yeah, yeah. Then we bring them to a family reunion around people they've never met before.

You start demanding that they go give that person a hug because they're family and you have to, what does that tell them? First of all, there's no choice with a safety and this is a stranger. Like, yeah. Okay. Wow. I mean, those kind of things can happen with strangers, but it can also happen with people inside the family.

And if you're teaching your kid that they have to allow anybody in the family to do whatever they want to them. Not exactly the best look.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Anyway. Some people get like there, people are like, you can't do that. Uncle Tom has to be able to have a hug. No, uncle Tom doesn't need to have a hug. Not [00:49:00] from a 5-year-old, not from a 10-year-old, not from a 15-year-old who doesn't want to, yeah, my body, my choice. I get to choose. And it's not even about all that kind of thing.

I'm saying I get to choose who touches. I get to decide who I'm going to give and isn't it interesting, like this is where our confidence actually comes from. If we can't choose, then how do we have confidence in ourselves to do anything else in the world? 'cause mm-hmm. We had to do something we found very uncomfortable.

And I can say that some of the things that I've had happen to me in my life, would've been easier if I knew I had a choice. Mm. That's powerful. You know, where if I knew that my voice mattered, if I knew my opinion mattered. If I could say something to somebody and they would believe me, some of the things that happened to me wouldn't have happened.[00:50:00]

Hmm. Because I was constantly not given a choice when I was growing up. Now that's Lala. You have to go give her a hug and then they pinch your cheeks off. And it's funny because grandma's not gonna do anything probably to you. Right? They're gonna pinch your cheeks and you get a hug, whatever.

At the same time, there are abusers in families. I would love to be able to say, not mine, but I can't. Yeah. Like we all wanted to not be our family. And then we find out way later that, oh, I didn't protect my kid when this person came to town, even though my kid detested it when they came to town. And now I find out why my kid detested it and now I'm guilty and all this other stuff happens.

And it could have just been avoided if you listen to your kid. Yeah. Most kids, there are some kids [00:51:00] who are like, oh, well I can, no, we're in a thing, I'm spoiled and now I can get my parents to do whatever I want. There's those, but most kids, if you say Carma and grandpa are coming, and they're usually ecstatic or they mumble about it being boring because all they're gonna want to do is play with mommy and daddy and play cards.

Right. Play. But they're not really opposed to it. Right? Yeah. Yeah. They're not saying no. Mm-hmm. But if your child automatically starts crying and is very upset, or if even if they don't cry, because some kids won't, you can tell that they're upset. They start acting out because aunt and uncle, whoever are coming over, then maybe you should listen to that and try to figure out what's happening.

Not maybe. Definitely. That was a very sarcastic, maybe. Okay. Yeah, no, I know. Yeah. So [00:52:00] I mean, it's just, and people don't do that. They're always like, no, but they're family. My kid has to give them a hug. I had one of my sisters, when I moved back to Maryland at one point, tried to tell her teenage daughter that she had to give me a hug and that she had to say she loved me.

And I'm going, I don't wanna hug. Please don't touch me. And second, I haven't been a part of this girl's life. What do you mean she has to hug me? What do you mean she has to, she doesn't even know me. Why would you think that? And so then it's, oh, but I'm your sister. I can give you a hug anytime I want to.

And then she'd pin my arms. She's probably the worst part of hugging me. Like, if you pin my arms, I'm automatically pissed at you. That's definitely sending your body into like. Stays. [00:53:00] Mm-hmm. Listen to your own body. Like I didn't like one day wake up and go, oh, my shoulder's tight.

Maybe that's because I was hunching over and when I was, you know, 'cause I do tend to hunch 'cause I leaned down on my desk. But listen to your body. Listen to what it's telling you. When I breathe some days I'm gonna go, maybe I should make sure I have my inhaler with me before I go anywhere.

'cause my lungs seem a little off. It's not that I can like quantify it. Like if you listen to my lungs, you'd be like, oh, there's nothing wrong. You're fine. But I know that I am like this close to going off. So if I meet somebody who has a lot of perfume on, it's gonna get done. Oh yeah. Perfume sensitive.

I'm very sensitive perfume. Not, not from that breathing point of view, but just. Smell point of view. So for me, my asthma is triggered in two different ways. My asthma is triggered by strong smells, and it doesn't have to be [00:54:00] perfume, but that's just the most prevalent way. Like, I can't go down the laundry detergent aisle at Walmart.

Oh, wow. I can't, that I can't breathe. Mm-hmm. It gets bad, going down the highway or whatever, those trucks that have the black smoke coming out of them mm-hmm. Because they're hot, whatever. Yeah. Sometimes they have the black smoke. If it's not on recycled air in the car and we're just breathing car air, I will have an asthma attack to the smell of that because it's so strong.

Driving by somewhere where a skunk went off, have an asthma attack if I'm that close. So, oh, bad. I can make sure, I mean, I always try to have it, but I obviously if I'm like, oh. This could house the potentially to be bad. So I make, you know, I double check that the inhaler is in there and that it has plenty of puffs left, right to everyone listening.

Whether you're listening [00:55:00] for the mental health part or you're listening for a business. If you're listening to, listen, Nikki dropped a really good bomb there with saying, listen to your body. It's literally one of the. And the more you practice listening to your body, the bigger or the bitter you become.

It's not just about whoever might have asthma, your breathing, but, or it's not just about how you feel around someone really want to let them into your space. But the more you do it, the more you begin to, it actually helps you with I think my body thrives off sleeping at this time, not eating these foods, doing my work.

I'm more productive at this hour. Like, listen to your body, what your body is actually more productive. And the more you listen in, the more you practice, the better you become and the better you become to recognize even when your brain's just trying to be lazy because you actually want something else.

And when you are actually, it's your body speaking like, hey, this is a most productive time. You, so then when you practice, then we begin to recognize those different things as well. So listen to your body. I love that. Mm-hmm. [00:56:00] And listen to the people around you. If you have kids espouse, listen to them and not just their words.

Because people will show you how they feel about you with their actions. So listen to their actions. Listen for what they're doing, for what they're saying. You know, maybe Uncle Joe, Bob isn't the best one to have around kids because even you, with some of his comments, sometimes wonder what he means, right?

Like, you are uncomfortable around Uncle Joe. Bob, why are you making your kid go near him? And then listen to your spouse, because obviously if you're in a relationship and married to that person, you've, chosen to spend your life with them. Why are you gonna make everybody miserable by not paying attention to each other?

Hmm. Not knowing, oh, he's really stressed out. I should probably let him play the [00:57:00] game for a while instead of fighting him every step of the way and making him more stressed. Yeah. And there's that whole thing where if you're not a gamer and you marry a gamer, leave the dude alone. Leave the chick alone.

Just, if it becomes obsessive and that's all they ever do, then maybe, but there doesn't need to be an argument over playing a game because yes, some games require time. Not saying they should have all their time in it, but sometimes Sure. I doubt any gamer's ignoring you if you married them, because Sheika, do you know how many gamers actually get married?

No. Especially to a non gamer. Like it's not a real high thing there, but they do have a lot of divorces because all he ever wanted to do was play games. He played for an hour three times a week. I think you need to shut up, kind of a thing. Wow. You [00:58:00] know, like it's a hobby. Just like you have your sewing or your crocheting.

Yeah. How much time do you spend doing that? Boy, that's true. Yeah. You like going to go, you know, you like going wandering around Michael's every Saturday for six hours. He spent less time gaming that day than you went shopping. Right. You have your hobbies, he has his stop being all weird about it, but Yeah.

Very. Yeah. Good point. You made there understanding each other's hobbies. Right. And then, 'cause that's what helps you bring the best you to the partners well.

Okay. So for the business side of things, it kind of dovetails in. 'cause I wanted to do, work life balance. So it kind of goes right off of what we were just saying.

If you're listening to yourself and you're listening to your spouse's actions and [00:59:00] words and stuff, then kind of know, your balancing act, right? Because we have to work because work is whatever it is. And if you are a stay at home mom or whatever, you may not work, but nine times outta 10 in the US anyway.

Moms who work at home maybe do blogging or they do other things to try to create income, to try to buffer the family. So they're still doing work. It's just differently handled because they have a kid on them the whole time. Kudos. I couldn't do it. I'd have to go put my kid in a dog tunnel or something.

I would not actually,

but like I just can't have people hanging on me. That's a thing. But, so that kind of gives you your line. Okay. So husband leaves at 5:00 AM to go to [01:00:00] work. I don't even have to get up until seven or eight with the kids. Well, he's already been working for however long, right? So there's that.

Yes, parents deserve breaks too. So if you are a stay at home mom, you should totally have, some time either Saturday or Sunday to go do something you want to do so that the kids stay home with dad or who, whoever the other partner.

There it is. But there has to be balance between always doing your main job, whether that's the husband who's doing a main job, the wife or both. And then the family, because maybe you have dinner every night at the same time and your husband tries to make it home every day, at least a half hour before that time starts so that, he can help corral kids and set the table.

Doing different things like that to support each other and, still [01:01:00] make sure that work is work and life is life. Because even me, okay. And I live for having things to do, even I, towards the end of the day, which for me can be seven or eight o'clock at night sometimes. I then relax.

I'll go read, I'll watch videos on YouTube. I'll play games because yes, I am a gamer, right? And so I do those types of things to try to relax and to take a step back away from work. Because if I only had business in my mind all the time, I'd burn out. And being burnt out is no joke. Coming back from burnout is just as hard as coming back from trauma because your brain is willing to keep doing.

But it's like that executive function thing that ARS and autism people talk about where they want to do the thing. The thing is right there, and [01:02:00] it would be easier for them to do the thing, but they can't, they cannot get their body to do. And I have those times too where I'm just like, no, you have to do, you have to get the thing done.

You have to stop not moving go, because my buddy's just like, yeah, no, we're not doing anything today. You know what you're doing to my plan.

So, at the end of the day, it has to be the end of the day. You have to have something else that you're doing and you're taking your mind completely off of work. And I mean that for the busy executive as much as I do for the janitor . I don't mean that janitors are less important than that.

I'm just saying, wherever in the company the hierarchy you are, it doesn't matter if you go home and pull out work and just do work, you have no friends, [01:03:00] you have no hobbies, you have nothing, you're gonna burn out. You will, I'm guaranteeing it. You're going to, and then what are you gonna do?

Because you're not gonna be able to work a hundred hours a week forever. Your body can't do it. But you need those breaks. Even if you do have home, work, you had to bring home from work.

What you then need to do is you come home. Without everything laid out in front of you. Go get something to eat, go do something else for a short period of time, right? Distract yourself for a little bit. And then what happens is when you come back to work, you're putting fresh eyes on it because you've refreshed your [01:04:00] brain.

Your brain is more, okay, now we can do some more work. Right? And then you get back into it and you'll see it a little bit differently. Make sure you get rest, make sure you do the things, so it's, I don't, this is a quote, I'm not really preaching anything, but through small and simple things, all things are possible.

So if you're brushing your teeth, going to bed at a decent time, doing the simple things, eating right, that kind of thing. Then you're less likely to burn out because you're taking time away from the work side of things to maybe get things done. Right? You have your brain on something else, so you're less likely not likely.

Caveat that saying if you brush your teeth, you're not gonna burn out, because that's the stupidest thing I've ever not said.[01:05:00]

I just wanted to add on there. Make some people feel like, think their brain is wired to just keep working and like I don't feel tired, I don't feel like I need to rest. But then they'll be chugging on coffee and need to drinks, or they might not be doing that with brains, like in a hyperactive state.

So then brushing your teeth and having a shower would also mean they're constantly thinking about that. So make sure when you are taking your time away to make sure you actually are gonna be more productive, like you are literally gonna be more productive by doing this, by doing something you love, having a hobby, even if it's, watching, sitting down, watching nothing, or gaming or cooking, whatever it is, just kind of switch off the brain for that.

It's not that your work is a bad thing, it's so that your brain is able to have creative time because your brain's, your creative is like so many different characteristics. So, to get more productivity and more creativity and more, [01:06:00] better outcomes and business, I.

It's so important, so crucial with what she said to take those breaks. But those breaks doesn't mean that while you're taking a break, you're on holiday or whatever, you're driving a long drive or going out for a run, but you're still thinking about that. Yeah. It's fine if you are on a run and your brain like all of a sudden gets an idea, maybe pop it down your phone and then think about something else again.

Just wanted little add that. Yeah. You want, yeah. When you're doing your other thing, it's not, oh, I'm going to go, you know, eat, but I'm only going to think about the problem I'm thinking about for work. Because if you do that, you're not actually taking a break. That's not taking a break. Who lied to you.

But that is not a break.

Definitely not a break.

I love the way you put things. Who lied to you? It doesn't have to be the same time [01:07:00] every day that you leave work. It doesn't have to be the same time. Like you don't wanna be too strict with your schedule either, right? If I don't leave at 8 0 2, then I'm a bad person and I'll never be successful in my entire, what the heck?

No, no. First of all, you should probably be leaving closer to five or six if you're working an office job, because why are you leaving at eight o'clock at night? But even if you are leaving at eight, you want to actually leave work. Work for most people, should not follow you home. I mean, if you're working an office job, seriously, you don't get paid enough to take work home with you, guaranteed.

Right. So, or if you're working from home for a corporate job, get your work done during the hours that they have specified that they need to be done. And [01:08:00] then don't go back to it later. No. Why be bored. Go do something interesting. Go learn how to crochet or knit or a full door origami, or put a puzzle together.

Pick something, anything. I'm pretty sure you can even learn how to put like little sticks together to make boats and put them in a, in a wine bottle. There's all sorts of things you can do, but it has to be completely separate from work so that your brain can think about, oh, if we put this little tweak here, that'll look really, really good.

And it'll look like the mass of the shit right. So there's plenty of things to do that can distract you. And if you have a family coming home and going into an office away from your family to do more work, you're cheating [01:09:00] your family. You're cheating them right outta time with you because you've decided that work is more important.

Work is important because that's how you make your money, but it's not more important than your family. Never can be, never should be.

So when you come home, be a mom, be a dad, spend time with the kids, help them do their bath, or maybe, I don't know how old they are, like obviously if they need help with the bath, help them get a good nighttime routine going for them. That forces you to not think about work. You gotta read them a story or you know that you have to do something with them and you're creating memories for your kids.

It's not about, oh, I have to be off from work right now. Mm-hmm. Yes is fine. Whatever. It's more, I'm creating memories with my kids. And my kids will remember this for the [01:10:00] rest of their lives, that my dad came home from work and he was there for me, or my mom came home from work and she didn't get mad at me when I said that.

I lost a tooth. I just lost a tooth. And I had this special routine I did so that the tooth Perry could give me money. You do whatever it is you do, you put your life together in a way that makes sense to for you, but while you're doing your job. Just know it's a job.

Even for me as a home, as a business, I'm not a homeowner as a business owner. Like it's a job. It is something that makes me money. It is not my entire world. Mm-hmm. Okay. It is just a part of your life. It's not your whole life. Yeah. And I mean, no, I'm not a super passionate lawyer or whatever, like I'm not trying to defend people from legal problems, but what I do is still important for the businesses that I do that for.

You do what is important [01:11:00] for you to help your patients. Yeah. I call them practice members. I call them practice members, and people call them clients, and people call them patients, but yeah, I don't know these words. Okay. For your practice clients, you know your people, like it's still a job.

You are doing a job. No matter how much it's from your heart, and this is the only thing I ever wanted to do. Guess what? If it's making you money, it's a job. You can call it a career, but it's still a job. You're just as much important to importance to some people as the cashier does at the grocery store.

You're not better than anybody else. No. You job that pays you more than some other people, right? There are other people that make more money than you, unless you're Steve Jobs. Apparently not. Steve Jobs. What's the other's name? Amazon, uh, what [01:12:00] is his name again? Completely. Um, gone Through My Mind. Yeah, that's a good one.

One of the names is, but this is not the name by Elon. What? That's another name. No. Musk? No, he's Tesla. But yeah. Makes lots of money. And your money is your money. You have to pay your taxes and that kind of thing and probably donate something. But your money is your money. So stop telling them they can't have their money.

Like yes, it's an obscene amount of money, but it's their money. They earned it. They did the thing, they created whatever, and now they get the money for that. Just nepotism. Come in on some of those. Probably not my problem. Not your problem. Just do your job. Do whatever it is your job. Stop thinking about nepotism.

Nobody cares. Just keep doing your job and going home to your family or just going home and doing a hobby. Do something. [01:13:00] Because if all you do is go to work, come home, go to sleep, get up, go to work, come home, get sleep. That's not to be rude, but that's very boring. That's very boring. That's not a lie. And you can't sustain that.

You shouldn't sustain that. Even if you're like, but I've been doing it for however long, it's fine. No, because you're probably lonely. Even if you have friends at work, they're not real friends. Right. Nobody's a real friend at work. So have that balance. Create it. Mm-hmm. And things can go differently for you.

You'd be surprised how different things can be, can go and in your work as well. Not just in your health and your life and your happiness [01:14:00] levels, but in your work as well, things begin to change because you are actually more. Life's more wholesome, even though you feel right now. And this is this is so questionable.

Those people who think they, don't need that experiment. Just remember, you are not your work. Your work is just a part of you. Your parents are a part of your life as well. Your kids, if you have kids, your partner, if you have a partner, your friends, are a part of you. Your hobbies are a part of you.

So we do things that actually give you different emotions as well, because you're a human, you're a robot, you have different emotions. We experience all of that. Then your body actually isn't in a state of stuckness because imagine this, if you do work in an office and then go home, sit down, same kind of state.

How are things flowing? Your body, you're stuck. You are pretty much being a robot. We already have those things created. You are created to be human. So go and explore all the different. Ways of your life or parts of your life so that you can actually be more productive, more creative in your own workspace as well.

If [01:15:00] you are someone who's like, work really excites them, really it motivates them being, if you are even productive at work, go engage with other things as well. And of course, like you said, I love how you see creating a life for your kids. And I just wanna add there, if you still have your parents, you're a big part of their life, so maybe connecting with them at times, if you, if they're far, giving them a video call, FaceTime or something, and just connecting with 'em through that as well.

At times, that's having maybe like a weekly schedule for that or daily, whatever works for you. Ouch. But yeah. Yeah. Your face for a split second was like, oh, that hurt. Okay. No, it's great. I hit my elbow.

Your face, like registered it and then wiped clean and like, Nope, nevermind. I'm not thinking about that. We're in performance by right now. We good face smile.

Yeah. [01:16:00] I actually do that a lot. This is the room where I have my consultations when people come for the first time. So I'll be talking and I'll explain things with my hand as I'm doing right now, using my hands a lot explaining. And he'll be like, yeah, like you hit yourself. Ll hit my hand. Like it actually like, ooh, ow.

And the person, they'll have like no emotion. I'm like, calm, calm yourself down. I'm like, Hmm, yeah, and I'll try carry on. But I'm like in a lot of pain. Yeah. This time it wasn't this time we missed the funny voice. We were lucky.

I have, obviously I have seen issues. One of my problems is my depth perception is off. And so if you walk me down a narrow hallway, I'll bounce off the walls like a drunk.

Oh, wow. And my body just doesn't know where to be and I can't like, tighten down and just walk because like my [01:17:00] eyes are like, no. So yeah, it gets interesting. I have like, where I go to do my meds for my mental health, very narrow hallway. And so the person will behind me and I'm pinging off and every single time I go, I'm like, I'm not drunk.

I do not drink. This is just my eyesight. I don't have chronic death perception issues. Like, oh gosh. Yeah. Wow. But I'm forever, hitting my shoulder on doors. Or my hands on doors, corners. Walls because of Makes sense. Makes sense. We always get short shoulders. Yep. So, I mean, my chiropractor does the wrist thing and I always want to hit him because it hurts, but then it feels a lot better and I'm just like, okay, it's fine.

You know what would be a good test? 'cause it would be to like, go into those halls where you're bumping off the walls and then after an adjustment, once your body's processed the [01:18:00] adjustment, just seeing if that changes, because sometimes that's actually a test we do here. We'll get people to close the eyes and much on the spot.

And then after, like over time. A couple weeks later, we do the testing again and that they've become, so the first time they might walk a meter, walk into the wall and stuff, and then after six weeks, 12 weeks, they pretty much stay on the same spot or just rotate. But yeah, like things begin to change. And so that would be a cool test to just try out personally for you, yourself.

So my, bio dad was in the military. My stepdad was in the military, so I went to military doctors. Wow. And, when I was, just learning how to walk, I would high step and then fall because like for me, my vision, the fall, the floor. Oh wow. I was trying to step on the floor and then I'd fall and hit my head because I had a big head.

So, they could not figure out what was wrong with me at that time. [01:19:00] They did spinal taps, they did all sorts of testing, right? They did at least two spinal taps. So I've had at least three in my entire life. Don't recommend them at all. But, I got all this testing and they kept telling my mom, we don't know what's wrong with her.

We don't know what's wrong with her. It's weird. We know something's wrong. We don't know what it is in the US Anyway, when you first start school, you have to get an eye test done and a hearing test done. Guess what that's when they found out. Yeah. She, they, she can't see. And then I learned that I have astigmatism and that kind of is where the death perception issues start from.

It took you a few years. It took me a few years, but, wow. Yeah. But hey. On a very silly note, you can use that to scare people off. Just walking into war, if you feel like you're a threat and someone might [01:20:00] be scary, you can just look like you are some scary drunk person yourself.

Okay. So do you have any final thoughts? I would just like to add on everything we see or summarize is, I think everything we spoke about really just linked into each other with creating safety in your body. If your body's in a 'cause that will help you sleep, that will help you be productive as well, that will help.

And. Creating a life balance, work-life balance also means that your body doesn't feel like it's in the go go go zone. Because for most people, 99.99, nine 9% people, I'm sure they might be that random 0.001%, that's gonna say they work in a very zen space. Work can relate to-do lists, and that means your body's in a, the whole thing we spoke about, where your body goes into the, sympathetic state, heart rate goes higher, eyes, brain, or everything we spoke about sweating, [01:21:00] tinting muscles.

That means your body's not in a safe space. So it's in a go, go, go state. It's in the space. If you're running it from a tiger, that's what your body does. So making sure that's why the work life balance also becomes very important. And that actually cream that balance will help also your, the way the body feels, which then means the brain feels, so it will feel actually.

Like it can be more productive because if you come into a calmer space, you're going to be able to tap into your body more. And like we said, listen to your body. 'cause if you're able to listen to your body, you'll be able to know, oh, I am feeling anxious. Why I'm feeling fearful or nervous or scared.

And yeah, they might sound like the same thing for some people, but for different people, they don't relate to the same words. Someone might be like, I'm not angry, I'm mad, or I'm not mad or angry, I'm just irritated. Like different words in different things. So recognize it and become [01:22:00] friends with it. And then work with and choose your focus and with the focus that again, we spoke about.

So I think we had some really good, points that you noted and I loved how you also linked to listen to your families or people around you, their body language. That was really cool. But yeah. Thank you. This is really fun. Thank you. I enjoyed having you here